Am I the Asshole?

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A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that's been...

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Muted_Major3648 on 2024-01-11 19:17:15+00:00.


So my newphew (7) repeats a lot of shit he sees on the internet. Recently he’s been calling Asian people “Ching-Chong”. This has gotten him at trouble at school but his parents don’t actually care about, they only told him not to say it and not that’s it’s degrading and racist. When I brought it up to my sister that he still says it around family, she simply said I’m too much of a snowflake (ignoring the fact that she’s blown a gasket over “reverse racism”). So I’ve decided to teach him myself. At first I told him that it’s mean to say that to people because what if people made fun of him for being white. He said he simply didn’t care, however he is incredibly self conscious about his glasses so I decided to use that instead in a different way. Yesterday my sister asked me to pick him up from school and when I arrived at the pick up point, a group of Asian students passed by and he started pulling his eyes back and saying Ching Ching. I then said loudly “nephew, at least they can actually see without needing big ass glasses!” And one of the students said “yeah my grandmas needs glasses too but they’re not as big as yours!” My nephew was visibly upset after this and on the way home, he cried and yelled at me. I told him now you know how those students feel but he wouldn’t listen. After I dropped him off home, I told my sister what happened and she got visibly upset and yelled at me saying that was too far and i shouldn’t have done that. AMITA?

EDIT: damn this blew up. So thanks to all the comments, the next time I pick up my nephew, I will explain To him that how he feels now is how those Asian students felt when he made fun of them.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Longjumping-Tower100 on 2024-01-12 05:13:04+00:00.


My (21m) gf (21f) had soup with red chili oil in it. A friend with the same soup put on her coat to protect her clothes from any splashes of soup and stains. My gf then asked for my coat to protect her sweater from the soup.

She thinks that since stains in my grey and blue coat would be less noticeable and potentially easier to clean than her new white sweater, I should’ve given it to her.

However, I thought that her solution to not getting soup on her sweater was to get it on my coat. And I did not give it to her. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Advanced-Bowler3494 on 2024-01-12 05:09:09+00:00.


AITA for standing up to my dad?

I’m completely torn here. I 20 female stood up to my dad Boxing Day 2023. After years of dealing with favouritism.

Let me start from the beginning, I told my dad that “my auntie wasn’t in a good place mentally and once I knew she was safe I would come up because I didn’t want to lose my auntie” my dad’s response to this was “well lose your dad instead” after that I focused on my auntie.

Once I got her home safe and dealt with. My dad text again asking if I had set off yet. And with shit hitting the fan that day and I had enough I have been living with my auntie for 1 and a half years now and my dad isn’t happy about that. So my dad told me that “he wants me home permanently” and I had told him that that wasn’t going to happen then followed by saying I was sick of the way he had treated me over the years all in all I told him if he was going to talk to me the way he did then I wasn’t coming to see him and was tired of the favouritism between me and my sister.

My sister then one hour later messaged me telling me that I was wrong for saying what I said to him. Now I feel like TAH

But AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/kuritaylo on 2024-01-12 05:06:24+00:00.


This is a new account I made just for this. All ages are also the current age of each individual and not the age at the time.

Early 2021, my aunt (58 F) called my mother (56 F) to inform us that her Ex-Husband of 20 years had just died. I am 19 M, so I never have or would've met the man ever, but from all I heard about him from family members and my aunt herself, he was very hated.

Of course my parents were very understanding about the news as they knew him and knew my aunt would be having a hard time, so they tried to be as supportive as possible, however they may have lacked in that department as they assumed she wouldn't have been as fully affected as she was, and eventually, my aunt went no contact with the whole family, including my grandparents, who are her parents.

After this happened, my parents and grandparents tried to make it up to her as they understood maybe they weren't there for her as much as they should've been, but it was no use, and she was in no way responsive to any of this. This continued on for months with little to no change, and my mother and grandparents were getting increasingly upset.

My aunt has always been cold to my family members, especially my father, who she has always seemed to try and break him and my mother up in such stunts as accusing him of stealing money he didn't steal, and she had tried to ruin things for me and my little brother too, such as accusing a family friend of my parents of grooming me and my little brother, which never happened. However, every time these events occurred, my family and grandparents, excluding my parents, would side with her, and would refuse to talk to us until we did what she wanted. As these things and much more had been happening my whole life, I had grown resent for my aunt, but I adored my cousins, who were her kids, so I tried to forget.

Fast forward to August 2022, she was invited to my older brother's wedding, and attended. As we got there, everyone was anxious on how any interactions would happen. During the day, there were slight "hi's" and "how are you's", but nothing more. However, she was friendly with me, as she said I hadn't done anything wrong so there was no reason to be mad at me, and to save the sake of my brother's special day, I didn't want to cause a scene.

However, at my brother's first dance with his wife, he played a song that meant a lot to our family, so my mother cried and went to hug my aunt, who yelled "GET OFF OF ME!" and pushed my mum to the ground. Only I and my cousin saw.

No one caused any more of a scene, but when I told my grandparents and father about it, I said she was dead to me and I never wanted to see her again. And even though 2 years later things are no better in family terms, I have been told by many I was an asshole to say that, even after a lifetime of problems caused by her, including at my mother's own son's wedding. So, AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Ambitious-Neck-754 on 2024-01-11 19:07:29+00:00.


My boyfriend (M32) and I (F29) are supposed to be getting married in December 2024. We have been engaged for 1.5 years and decided to wait another year before getting married to incorporate all of our family's varying schedules but most importantly my boyfriend's sister's (FSIL - F29) exam schedule. for context, FSIL is a doctor completing her residency in another country. Her exam schedule was messed up because of the pandemic and therefore, we tried to find a date as far out as possible to avoid a potential conflict.Now, we just found out that her exam might be around those dates (not same day because weekend wedding but might be on Friday or Monday). She wants us to change our wedding date even though the venue is booked with the initial deposit payment.So we decided to reschedule to mid-November for her benefit. Given that she already knows the tentative dates for her exam, she has this entire year to study and prepare barring our wedding weekend and a couple more days for shopping/ pre-wedding stuff around that weekend. Also, she will have 2 weeks after our wedding to revise and get in the groove to give her exams.She's still unhappy about the new wedding date and claiming that we don't consider her and her exam important enough and don't want her to attend our wedding since we're not scheduling for after her exams. She claims that 2 weeks is not enough time for her to study and will make her perform poorly. She wants us to move the wedding to January instead. She directly targeted me and told her mom and aunts that I don't consider her exams important.Her mom (FMIL) is now claiming that we can get married whenever we want and FMIL and FSIL will not attend.I'm furious with this attitude. This is a girl who has continuously tried to make me get my wedding outfit and my entire wedding theme, food, etc. according to her tastes (we have VERY different styles and tastes), increasing my guest list to include almost 10 of her friends and other such things.Not to mention, she is planning to get married end of 2025 and doesn't want to share her wedding MONTH with any of her cousins - ie, if her cousin wants to get married in November 2025, she won't marry in the same month.FMIL says I need to learn to compromise and to give in because that's what you do when you join a new family and that none of this is FSIL's fault and that education is more important than weddings.My boyfriend and I have had to jump through a lot of hoops with our families and come a long way from fighting with each other like children and have finally learned to live as a happy couple.So we're both on the same page and are frustrated with this new problem cropping up.

AITA if I tell her to stop acting so entitled and making my wedding about her?

EDIT: We can't pick a date before November 15th or between December 16th - January 15th due to religious reasons (same religion for both families). Our original date was in the 2nd week of December. While postponing one more month is technically not a big deal, it's about principle... we're just so tired of waiting.

EDIT 2: Our parents are each contributing 50% to the wedding cost. It's in our home country where SIL resides. We will be the ones flying home. The wedding is in the same country as SIL just a different city. And I have to add, regardless of my SIL, MIL up until this point has been the pinnacle of grace and kindness and has been pretty nice to me.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Embarrassed_Dark_711 on 2024-01-12 05:02:21+00:00.


So I (17F) go to this private high school that's considered really prestigious, like all the kids there are super gifted and were accepted into the school because of that. It's customary for the students to receive school-issued tablets when they arrive, so all of us in our current year obviously have one. The tablets have their own messaging system, and our whole graduating class is part of one big group chat for the year we graduate.

Some of my classmates were talking about where they were for the break, since our winter break recently ended a few days ago. At one point, one of my classmates, Arlo (18M) said something about going to bed, but it was only 4 PM where the school is located and at the time, we weren't aware that he wasn't back in the country yet.

At this point, this is where the situation happened, and the conversation went something like this:

Arlo: time to sleep, good night

Sori (17F): it's 4 pm?

Arlo: exactly

Komatsu (18M): that's hardly bedtime.

Me: goodnight at 4 pm? i mean, you do you

Masahiro (17M): The break just ended, so some of us are bound to still be in different time zones.

Me: learn to read, arlo said "exactly" when sori questioned the time

Masahiro: Well, you all tend to joke around a lot, so I assumed that you were all currently joking.

Me: maybe just shut up

A few other classmates who weren't involved in the conversation but saw it happen PMed me afterwards to say that I had been rude to Masahiro over something so small. Honestly, I don't see the issue since it doesn't take a genius to figure out when people are joking or not. But no, apparently, because Masahiro is autistic, he needs to be told when someone is joking or being serious. Like come on, he's not a fucking idiot, I think he can figure it out for his own damn self.

Some people have been saying that telling him to shut up was mean, but I don't think it was that big of a deal. Am I really the asshole here??? I don't really think that I am, tbh.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Dull-Wish804 on 2024-01-11 18:51:24+00:00.


4 years ago I married my now husband who has a son. His son is 24 years old and his university graduation was last Monday. My relationship with his son is not strong considering I married his father when he was away for university ,however, we are on good terms of mutual respect. I am always present at his important events and he was also for mine.

His graduation was supposed to be not on this past Monday but the Monday before (so 2 weeks ago) but it got postponed for this past Monday. The problem was my childhood best friend whose literally my sister birthday was this past Monday and she was traveling the night of her birthday so we had the birthday af afternoon. I am also one of the party organizers and this girl is my closest person even closer than my husband and I couldn’t leave her at the same time it is the graduation that got suddenly postponed while I already had plans.

Knowing this I texted my step son saying sorry that I will not be able to show up , congratulated him for his graduation and he responded nicely. My husband thought was annoyed at this and wanted me to skip the birthday to attend the graduation I told him I can’t and that it is not my fault the graduation got postponed. I also told him that we are hosting a graduation party for his son and his friends at the house and I am coming so I am still celebrating him just not on the official day but that’s because I do have my plans too and it is the graduation that got changed, if I knew before that the graduation was gonna be this past Monday I would’ve asked my friend to have the party after she comes back she wouldn’t have declined that at all because she wants me to be present as much I do. But we already organized everything and invited everyone we couldn’t just cancel last minute.

His graduation party came , I gave him his gift and congratulated him again and he looked fine but his father and his mother too kept side eyeing me the whole night like I am a criminal for not throwing away every plan I had. My husband still gives me shit for it so AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/haionequastion on 2024-01-12 04:44:26+00:00.


(sorry if this is rambling, I’ve never made a reddit post before) I lived with my three roommates (I’ll call Abe, Betty and Conrad for simplicity) for ~3 years

In that time period, I regularly refused to do dishes, take the trash to the dump or even empty out the can, dust, vacuum, or EVER clean off the counters. I really mean ANY joint chores. just refused, and while none of them ever complained to my face, I do Know they were talking shit.

BUT.. if they would have cleaned up their own mess in shared spaces I would have been naturally willing to do my part, but I refuse to enable cesspits

So I hope you’ll hear me out

Before moving in together, I had previously been with a multi year long abusive relationship with a hoarder (which all of them knew about) where I’d spent way too long cleaning up after people who wont appreciate it and so I have developed the mindset of clean up after yourself, anyone elses mess is their problem. I have made this mindset known & frequently spoke about why I refused to be the one cleaning up everones messes, which is mainly why I feel justified.

I had known Abe and Betty since highschool and knew they were both messy people, especially Betty, but I had hoped (and theyd vaguely promised..) that moving to a new city, away from their families, with roommates (including Conrad, who is…also not the neatest) to take into consideration.. that theyd grow up and pick up after themselves as they promised they would (I forgot to mention, but the ages range from 22 to 28, so these are not Kids I’m talking about) but this was clearly not the case.

So when dishes are piling up in the sink, or general shit is piling up on the counters, when theres cat fur or piss or whatever all over (because they have 8 cats btwn the three of them, did I mention that? many of whom piss on the furniture or any clothes you leave lying around?) and I’m?? for some reason supposed to help out???

that pile of dishes has nothin to do with me since I hand wash mine ((disclaimer I Would occasionally forget or leave a pan or too to soak but I still don’t think that entitled me to dealing with that whole mess)), that counter IS a pile of garbage I agree, but none of its mine.

And yeah I do walk on this carpet to go to & from work but not enough that I feel I should have to be part or cleaning all the piss and fur off of it..and obviously I do contribute to the trash, so I should at least help with that, right? I disagree. I was told that since I drink more than them (Abe and Betty in particular smoke more uhh.. grass.. than basically anyone but rarely drink) I had to take my own trash to the dump so the booze remnants didnt stink up their car? ok. so I always took my personal trash and (shared!!) bathroom trash to the dump myself. is the kitchen trash overflowing??? not my problem, sorry if it smells.

I can tell I was being massively passive aggressive in refusing to clean.. but AITA?? genuinely? from my pov I made my stance on cleaning up after yourself clear and ALL of them chose to ignore… (for reference I’ve lived on my own for about half a month now and magically have had none of that mess piling up….)

EDIT: would like to clarify I have since moved out!! I now live on my own, I would just like to know if my response to their.. lifestyle(?) is justified or too harsh!

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Disastrous_Front_725 on 2024-01-11 18:17:35+00:00.


Edit: TLDR at end.

Posting on throwaway because there’s enough info you could figure out on my main if you know me.

Ok so I’m in high school and this was in my english class. Our real teacher is on paternity leave and we have a long term substitute. So yesterday she was telling us she wants us to write personal memoirs about something very important in our lives, and she goes about listing various examples for different students. She told me I could write about being adopted and how I felt when my parents told me.

Now I must have made a face then, because I’m not adopted. I have two dads but they had me through surrogacy. So technically there was a legal adoption for my non-bio dad, but one of my dads is my bio dad, and my bio “mom” is my other dads sister who donated her egg and carried me. I think it would be a stretch to call me adopted, also the sub has no basis to even know any of this because as much as I’ve written in class is just that I have two dads.

Anyway, she’s kinda old school and doesn’t like when we talk too loud (which to her is talking at a normal indoor level on group assignments), make any normal faces, and whatever. She basically called me out on making a face and was like “OP if you don’t want to write about being adopted you can choose another important topic to your life, maybe how you help your dad at home?” (one of my dads has cerebral palsy and is mostly blind from optic neuropathy, I did write briefly about that in the intro assignment with our other teacher so he must have left them with her to get to know the class).

I was confused so I said “I’m not adopted.”

She just put her hand over her heart and goes “oh, honey.”

So now my brain which was lagging caught up and I realize she’s only thinking I’m adopted because I have two dads. So at this point I’m like whatever, I’ll just play into it, so I look upset and I’m like “I didn’t know I was adopted!”

She’s kind of panicking a bit and telling everyone to just start writing something. A lot of my friends are laughing under their breath because they know I’m not adopted so she’s telling everyone quiet down and it’s not funny and to get to work. I’m like “what do you mean I’m adopted?”

She’s trying to tell me not to worry about it and just ask my dads when I get home. And I’m like “how can I be adopted?” So she just sends me to the school counselor, and I told her this story basically and she basically gave off the vibe that it was a shitty thing to mess with the sub that way and I could have just explained I’m not adopted because now I’ve made her worry unnecessarily and embarrassed her. I don’t think parts of my life are up to her to decide what I want to share or not, and I feel like its on her if she feels embarrassed for assumptions she made, maybe that makes me the asshole?

TLDR. Teacher assumed I'm adopted because I have two dads. I pretended to be upset like I'm learning for the first time, from her, that I'm adopted. Btw I'm not adopted, dads had me though surrogacy.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Dry_Tax_2352 on 2024-01-11 18:17:05+00:00.


I’m sorry if there’s any mistakes english isn’t my first language

My daughter (16f) was always very loud about her femininity, she always had glitter on her, her favorite color was pink, she had bows in her hair, skirts and dresses were her favorites clothes, she was very gentle and shy, she was like those princesses from the books.

Almost a year ago she started to change, slowly she stopped wearing pink, dresses and skirts and went to over sized pants and t-shirts. She stopped wearing makeup and it was rare to see any color on her that wasn’t dark. I tried to talk to her but she would just shut me out, she became a different person. I put her in therapy and it had helped a little but not by much. I didn’t know what to do anymore so I just let her be but made sure that I was there for her and to continue her therapy.

Two days ago my daughter finally broke down and admitted that her brother has been picking on her and laughing about her. She said he kept talking about the sentence “lipstick on a pig” around her.

I was shocked, I never thought my son would act like that but I knew she was telling the truth from the pain in her eyes.

When my son came back home that day I told him that my daughter told me what he did and that he’s grounded until his 18th birthday (it’s in 5 months), I took his phone and computer and told him that he would get his phone before school and that I will take it back when I get home (I get home around the same time as him since he have a long school day and basketball practice).

He tried to protest but I just asked him if she was lying and he wouldn’t answer me so I took that as a yes and hasn’t talked to him since except for when I have too.

I don’t know how to deal with all of this, my daughter seems to get worse since I grounded her brother but she has told me that he hasn’t talked to her since and that she just feel bad.

I’m starting to feel bad too, both of my kids are miserable now, I’m barley talking to my son and I don’t know how to even begin to explain this to my family since my husband side of the family has heard about this and has been sending me angry text along with my SIL coming to my house to scold me about not listening to his side.

My husband supports my punishment but he works long hours and isn’t home too much so it’s all up to me.

I need to know if I’m in the wrong here?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/BoiledGoose108 on 2024-01-11 16:45:53+00:00.


I'm the sole breadwinner in the house. I asked her to take care of the baby while I take a nap before I go to work at around 10:00. Half an hour later, I hear a loud banging sound that wakes me up. It takes me a few minutes, but I realized that it's the baby kicking her feet on the back door (it's a sliding glass door). So I come out of the room and tell the baby to stop kicking the door and I see her sitting on the couch playing her game. So naturally I comment on how I asked her to watch the kid and how is she supposed to do that when she's playing her game, to which she replies "sorry I didn't realize how hard she was kicking the door." For one, of course you don't realize how loud the baby's being, your attention is on the video game. For two, I asked you to watch the kid, how are you supposed to do that when you're investing your time into a video game. So I go back and try and nap with little confrontation and when I do I pause thr WiFi to my PlayStation via my Internet service app because this is a regular occurrence (her playing games instead of watching the kid). Once she realizes, she storms into the bedroom pissed off and saying I'm controlling her and how she's gotta leave the house and cool off because she's so pissed off when all I want is for her to watch the child while I take a nap before I go to work. I don't play videogames unless I'm home by myself or the baby's asleep. Her argument was that the baby ran to play in their room. My argument is that the baby is two and doesn't need a parent preoccupied with videogames when the baby climbs on furniture and kicks on windows and pulls cat's tails.

Since she's stormed out of the house, I've put kid shows on and the baby and I have been cuddling on the couch, keeping warm, which tells me that the baby was annoyed that momma was playing her games instead of interacting with her.

Am I the asshole for disconnecting my PS5 from the WiFi so my baby could be properly watched?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Sad_Satisfaction_477 on 2024-01-11 15:39:33+00:00.


Hi so I am a 32 F married to my husband who’s 35. We have been married for 6 years now with 0 kids from our marriage. My husband tho when he was in college he and his past gf had a child but her family and she had the custody too.

Since my husband and I got married his son came for sleepovers. I personally never liked the boy’s behavior he was a bit rude but I never interfered with him and let his father talk with him whenever something bad happened.

However, some months ago I caught him peeking into my undergarments stuff , mind you he is a 16 yrs old now and we never had the mother-son bond that would justify such an act. He begged me not to expose him to his father and I agreed. I agreed and warned him about. Another day, he was at the house after his school and I saw him hurriedly getting out of the bedroom I then entered to see what he was doing and found that my undergarments drawer wasn’t closed properly, I opened it and noticed that 2 of

my bras were missing. I went and opened his school bag saw the stolen bras and confronted him about it then while we were fighting his father arrived and learned about everything.

All that happened 5 months ago and the boy was restricted from coming into the house without his father’s presence and his father also took away his keys. Now the mother is traveling but she can’t take her son with her because of school, and he can’t cook , clean or anything so he can’t stay alone and she wants him to stay with us for the month she’s traveling. I told my husband that I won’t feel safe at all and that I can’t have him for a month. I told him he could go stay with the boy in the mother’s house for the month while I stay here but I cannot have him with me for a month. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/HorrorCap6745 on 2024-01-11 15:04:43+00:00.


I (f18) have two brothers (m26) and (m28), they're both married.

Well, I still live with my parents, I had a big announcement to make for my family. My boyfriend and I have gotten engaged, and I also will move out to live with him because I'm pregnant.

The thing is that I wanted to tell the news to my whole family all at once, so last Saturday I told my mother that I was going to make dinner, I invited my two brothers, but asked them to come alone (without their wives or my oldest brother's children). My oldest brother was quite annoyed and asked me why his wife and children could come, I told him that I wanted to have a family dinner with just us (parents and siblings)

Well, I cooked dinner last Friday, they came and then I finally made the announcement. I was surprised by how unsupportive my family was... But anyway, at some point my brother asked me again why this had to be with just us? Why couldn't his family come too, my other brother agreed that it wasn't something worth being so secretive about.

I told them that I wanted to have dinner with my family, and their wives aren't. They got very upset over that, telling me that I'm insensitive because their wives are their family, and I should consider them that as well. My oldest brother got even more upset because he said that I don't consider his children my family. It all went down and my brothers and I had an argument, my parents tried to calm my brothers down, but my oldest brother accused them of "spoiling me"

I was feeling very stressed, so I left, I texted my boyfriend so he'll pick me up. The next day my oldest brother's wife called me the next day to yell at me too because I'm supposedly not including her in family events, I told my parents that and they got very angry with my brother. I don't think I did anything bad to be honest... My brothers misinterpreted my words to try to make me seem bad, but I just wanted dinner with my family... Am I wrong?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Funny-Distance9785 on 2024-01-11 17:08:07+00:00.


Okay I have 2 daughters (16 and 13). About 4 years ago my husband passed away. I put both my children into therapy but after a year my youngest decided that she didn’t need to continue the appointments. However, my eldest has continued the appointments throughout, she feels like it helps with dealing with stress and other issues.

My youngest was diagnosed with a serious illness and the medical bill is way out of my budget. Therapy is already very expensive but I was able to manage but therapy and medication is too much especially since I have no other support.

I sat my eldest and told her this but I told her in 6 months she should be able to go back because that’s when the treatment ends and hopefully so does my daughter’s illness.

She became very quiet and upset and has been giving the cold shoulder ever since this Monday. Today my daughter’s friend mom called to tell me that I’m favoring another daughter over my daughter and how it’s not fair each child doesn’t get their own needs.

I’m actually so lost because I don’t know what to do am I actually favoring one daughter over the other?

AITA

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/EnvironmentalWave740 on 2024-01-11 13:33:21+00:00.


My legal name is Flora. Not Florence. My parents chose to use just Flora when I was born and I always liked my name a lot. But for most of my life I have been Florry to most people. Even at work my co-workers call me Florry. I will answer to either Flora or Florry. And some people prefer to call me Flora which I'm totally fine with. But ever since I first met my ILs 2 years ago they have been so weird about my name. They started out by asking me a hundred times if my name was actually Florence. Then they asked me why my parents chose to give me a nickname (Flora) as a legal name instead of the full name Florence and call me Flora instead. But what really bothers them is the fact I use Florry and somewhat prefer it over Flora. They told me they cannot understand a professional woman using such a juvenile sounding name. They said every time they hear the name they expect a 6 year old and not a 28 year old woman. My husband has been wonderful about shutting them down and telling them to stop and calling them out on being disrespectful. We have distanced ourselves from his parents due to this.

But now whenever we see them at family functions they call me Florence. First time I really hoped they were talking to someone else. But no, it was me. My husband told me to ignore them if I wanted and so I did. My husband's siblings all think their parents are being ridiculous and all of them call me Florry in an effort to piss their parents off (some used to call me Flora and Florry but even Flora doesn't exist to them now lol).

We were all together for a New Years party and my husband's parents brought some friends. They and their friends all called me childish, among other things, for refusing to answer to Florence. My husband got so annoyed he went over to tell them they were being ridiculous when Florence isn't even my name. They told him Florence could be seen as just another nickname and I am being unreasonable and rude.

I felt very called out but honestly the anger and way they talked about me made me question if I am being a tad unreasonable and if I shouldn't just let them call me Florence. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/SheepleGoesPlaces on 2024-01-11 16:48:29+00:00.


My father was asking people and found someone he used to know back in the day. He said he can help my brother in law get a really sweet position. (Everyone believes he is telling tall tales.) The catch is that he wont give away his contact, even if he has been humbly braggin saying their position (only one in the whole country) to my father.

FFW he finaly said they will call the contact and arrange for my brother in law to talk with that person via the phone. My father said they can meet somewhere public (coffeeshop) but this guy insisted they should meet somewhere private. The only place close by is my house and my sister called me to ask if its ok to give them the keys to have their meeting while I was at work. I said no cause I feel this whole thing smells bad... AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/whutchamacalllit on 2024-01-11 16:35:32+00:00.


A few weeks ago my mom came over and explained my dad had confronted her about my conception. He was watching YouTube and a video was talking about calculating a baby’s due date by conception date. He did the calculations and thinks my mom cheated on him because he was out of town that supposed conception day, based on the due date the Dr gave my mom. My mom asked if I would take a paternity test so that she has proof I am his daughter, and then he would stop bring it up. I was shocked. I said I would, but now that he bought the test, and is asking me to take it, I am having doubts. My dad has always been paranoid and accused people of wild things. My mom obviously didn’t cheat on my dad since due dates are a guess. If I don’t take the test he will keep bring it up, he can’t let go of intrusive thought. WIBTA if I told him no to the paternity test?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Sad_Satisfaction_477 on 2024-01-11 15:39:33+00:00.


Hi so I am a 32 F married to my husband who’s 35. We have been married for 6 years now with 0 kids from our marriage. My husband tho when he was in college he and his past gf had a child but her family and she had the custody too.

Since my husband and I got married his son came for sleepovers. I personally never liked the boy’s behavior he was a bit rude but I never interfered with him and let his father talk with him whenever something bad happened.

However, some months ago I caught him peeking into my undergarments stuff , mind you he is a 16 yrs old now and we never had the mother-son bond that would justify such an act. He begged me not to expose him to his father and I agreed. I agreed and warned him about. Another day, he was at the house after his school and I saw him hurriedly getting out of the bedroom I then entered to see what he was doing and found that my undergarments drawer wasn’t closed properly, I opened it and noticed that 2 of

my bras were missing. I went and opened his school bag saw the stolen bras and confronted him about it then while we were fighting his father arrived and learned about everything.

All that happened 5 months ago and the boy was restricted from coming into the house without his father’s presence and his father also took away his keys. Now the mother is traveling but she can’t take her son with her because of school, and he can’t cook , clean or anything so he can’t stay alone and she wants him to stay with us for the month she’s traveling. I told my husband that I won’t feel safe at all and that I can’t have him for a month. I told him he could go stay with the boy in the mother’s house for the month while I stay here but I cannot have him with me for a month. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/throwaway1113377 on 2024-01-11 12:37:27+00:00.


My boyfriend (24m) and I (20f) both really enjoy theme parks. We've always wanted to go to Disney and made plans to do so, but since its a kinda long drive and its expensive we just planned for 'sometime in the future'.

Now my whole family is going, 30ish people, and they invited my boyfriend too. I thought this was great, I don't see my family often, plus it's a free trip to Disney. Amazing.

But my boyfriend has concert tickets for the same week, and said he'd rather go to that. I asked if he's sure, he was. I said I'd bring him souvenirs and take pictures, and he was suprised I still wanted to go. After all, we said we'd go together and he wanted to experience it for the first time together. I reminded him that he's still able to go if he wants, and we can still go together at a later date. But he doesn't want me to go at all.

I don't feel this is reasonable, I don't see my family a lot since they're all spread out and don't get together much. Besides that it's just a fun trip, I would love to run around with my nieces and nephews there (they're all younger) to make memories. I understand being a bit sad that we don't get to go together, but if the situation was reversed I'd really want him to go.

WIBTA for going even though he doesn't want me to?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/HorrorCap6745 on 2024-01-11 15:04:43+00:00.


I (f18) have two brothers (m26) and (m28), they're both married.

Well, I still live with my parents, I had a big announcement to make for my family. My boyfriend and I have gotten engaged, and I also will move out to live with him because I'm pregnant.

The thing is that I wanted to tell the news to my whole family all at once, so last Saturday I told my mother that I was going to make dinner, I invited my two brothers, but asked them to come alone (without their wives or my oldest brother's children). My oldest brother was quite annoyed and asked me why his wife and children could come, I told him that I wanted to have a family dinner with just us (parents and siblings)

Well, I cooked dinner last Friday, they came and then I finally made the announcement. I was surprised by how unsupportive my family was... But anyway, at some point my brother asked me again why this had to be with just us? Why couldn't his family come too, my other brother agreed that it wasn't something worth being so secretive about.

I told them that I wanted to have dinner with my family, and their wives aren't. They got very upset over that, telling me that I'm insensitive because their wives are their family, and I should consider them that as well. My oldest brother got even more upset because he said that I don't consider his children my family. It all went down and my brothers and I had an argument, my parents tried to calm my brothers down, but my oldest brother accused them of "spoiling me"

I was feeling very stressed, so I left, I texted my boyfriend so he'll pick me up. The next day my oldest brother's wife called me the next day to yell at me too because I'm supposedly not including her in family events, I told my parents that and they got very angry with my brother. I don't think I did anything bad to be honest... My brothers misinterpreted my words to try to make me seem bad, but I just wanted dinner with my family... Am I wrong?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Illustrious_Gas3265 on 2024-01-11 12:22:27+00:00.


I (21M) was the second of five kids and the only one born without any disability. All of my siblings require lifelong care. None of them are capable of being intendent and some have more physical sicknesses than others as well. Growing up my parents prioritized my siblings and never put any time or attention into me. I was expected to be okay missing out on everything and my parents excuse for my lack of opportunity was that they had no money or they would straight up say I didn't need to have those things in my life. I have some really great friends who I was close with back then. Some of their parents would offer to pay for me to attend field trips or to go to an amusement park or for a weekend vacation and my parents refused every single time. They told me I was not allowed to accept the help from others. Once I told my parents I was going to say yes no matter what they said and they yelled at me and told me I was their kid and they could stop me going if they wanted to. I think that was the time my best friends family wanted me to join them Christmas shopping in another city and my parents were not okay with that.

I resent my parents for that. I will admit to that. I feel like they denied me those chances because they couldn't have them and they felt if nobody else in the family was getting those experiences then they weren't going to let me have them either.

I also wasn't allowed to work because I was "needed at home" which meant helping out with my siblings or with household chores. A home nurse used to call in on occasion to help and she was only allowed to help my mom or dad. If she tried to help me my parents would pull her away.

When I finally turned 18 things were still kinda recovering from Covid and stuff so I worked retail for a while until I got a job where they were willing to train me and help me climb the ladder through training and working. That has been a huge life changer for me and I am finally starting to make better money. I started to spoil myself some. I bought a PS5 for my 21st birthday. I went on a couple of cheaper vacations with my friends. I'm making up for lost time honestly. I even finally bought myself a car.

My parents heard about my life from some of their friends who see me on social media. They weren't happy for me and in fact, they shamed me for forgetting all about my family while I'm "treating myself like a king" which is a direct quote from my mom. They told me I should be using what I have to help my family and giving them time off since their full time lives revolve around working and caring for my siblings with no down time. They told me I was taking my childhood resentment out on them which wasn't fair because they did their best when faced with challenges I could never understand.

AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/EnvironmentalWave740 on 2024-01-11 13:33:21+00:00.


My legal name is Flora. Not Florence. My parents chose to use just Flora when I was born and I always liked my name a lot. But for most of my life I have been Florry to most people. Even at work my co-workers call me Florry. I will answer to either Flora or Florry. And some people prefer to call me Flora which I'm totally fine with. But ever since I first met my ILs 2 years ago they have been so weird about my name. They started out by asking me a hundred times if my name was actually Florence. Then they asked me why my parents chose to give me a nickname (Flora) as a legal name instead of the full name Florence and call me Flora instead. But what really bothers them is the fact I use Florry and somewhat prefer it over Flora. They told me they cannot understand a professional woman using such a juvenile sounding name. They said every time they hear the name they expect a 6 year old and not a 28 year old woman. My husband has been wonderful about shutting them down and telling them to stop and calling them out on being disrespectful. We have distanced ourselves from his parents due to this.

But now whenever we see them at family functions they call me Florence. First time I really hoped they were talking to someone else. But no, it was me. My husband told me to ignore them if I wanted and so I did. My husband's siblings all think their parents are being ridiculous and all of them call me Florry in an effort to piss their parents off (some used to call me Flora and Florry but even Flora doesn't exist to them now lol).

We were all together for a New Years party and my husband's parents brought some friends. They and their friends all called me childish, among other things, for refusing to answer to Florence. My husband got so annoyed he went over to tell them they were being ridiculous when Florence isn't even my name. They told him Florence could be seen as just another nickname and I am being unreasonable and rude.

I felt very called out but honestly the anger and way they talked about me made me question if I am being a tad unreasonable and if I shouldn't just let them call me Florence. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/StatPaddingORiley on 2024-01-11 12:15:17+00:00.


I (19M) live with my Mom (39), Step dad (36M) and my 2 younger brothers (15M, 3M). My mom and Dad split up during the pandemic which took a hard hit on me as I was close to my dad.

Three months later she started dating my step-dad who we'll call Steve, I liked Steve at first as we had a lot in common and he has done a lot for me but over the past few months I've started to dislike him. He talks about respect a lot and he expects me and my brother to respect him because of what he does.

We had moved house recently and I was excited as it was the first time I had my own room as I had always shared with my brother, I had asked both my mom and Steve to knock on my door if they were coming into my room which I don't believe is a hard ask. My mom has always done this but Steve never does, he always swings my door open and I always ask him to knock, a few days ago I asked again to which he replied "when you get your own house you can have privacy", this bugged so I responded with "you're a grown man, knocking a door shouldn't be hard for you" this set him off and he started raising his voice saying "I'm the reason you have a house over you head, I don't see your dad paying any bills", I then told him to not speak about my dad like that as he had nothing to do with this, I told him that for a guy who expects respect off everyone he's the most disrespectful person I've ever known and that he should earn my respect, too which I replied he hasn't earned yet and he never will. He told me to leave which I did.

I'm currently staying with my dad and have gotten phone calls and messages from the other side of my family telling me to go back to their house and apologise to Steve, but i don't feel like I have to. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/throwaway1113377 on 2024-01-11 12:37:27+00:00.


My boyfriend (24m) and I (20f) both really enjoy theme parks. We've always wanted to go to Disney and made plans to do so, but since its a kinda long drive and its expensive we just planned for 'sometime in the future'.

Now my whole family is going, 30ish people, and they invited my boyfriend too. I thought this was great, I don't see my family often, plus it's a free trip to Disney. Amazing.

But my boyfriend has concert tickets for the same week, and said he'd rather go to that. I asked if he's sure, he was. I said I'd bring him souvenirs and take pictures, and he was suprised I still wanted to go. After all, we said we'd go together and he wanted to experience it for the first time together. I reminded him that he's still able to go if he wants, and we can still go together at a later date. But he doesn't want me to go at all.

I don't feel this is reasonable, I don't see my family a lot since they're all spread out and don't get together much. Besides that it's just a fun trip, I would love to run around with my nieces and nephews there (they're all younger) to make memories. I understand being a bit sad that we don't get to go together, but if the situation was reversed I'd really want him to go.

WIBTA for going even though he doesn't want me to?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Notmychildnyoubitch on 2024-01-11 08:09:41+00:00.


Hi I'm 37F. I have a 10 year old son. I'll call him Sam.

My son was invited to a sleepover from one of his classmates, lets call him Taylor. Because I didn't know his parents very well, we got together a few times so we could get to know each other. We eventually set up a date and the other mother which I'll call Lady for now on, insisted on hosting the event. I agreed and later dropped my son off, telling him to behave and all that jazz.

Toward the end of the day around 9-ish, I got a call from my sons phone. He has a basic flip phone for things like this. He was upset and wanted to come home. I asked what was wrong and he told me that Lady wanted to put him in a diaper.

I told him to put her on the phone and she answered it in a huff telling me my son wasn't being stubborn and misbehaving. I could hear my son in the background saying he just wanted to go home. So I told her I'd be there in a few minutes and hung up.

When I got there i was let in by her husband, he apologized for the trouble and I went to find my son. He was still upset when I found him sitting at their kitchen table along with Taylor. Asked him what was going on and he explained to me that because Taylor wet his bed Lady wanted him to wear a diaper as well. I turned and looked at lady and told her Sam doesn't wet the bed and didn't need to put anything extra on for bed.

She argued back that it wouldn't hurt him and would make Taylor feel better. To be honest I kind of understood where she was coming at and even considered asking Sam if he'd be willing to do it for his friend.

That was until I saw the thing, I was expecting a pullup. But this was what looked like a thick adult diaper meant to fit kids. Then the shocker came when my son told me she tried me make him take off his pants and lay on the floor so she could put it on him. I turned back to Lady and told how inappropriate this all was and collected his things to leave. She got belligerent and said Sam didn't have anything she hasn't seen before.

So we left, Taylor the pore boy looked crestfallen. Not that a blame him at all. But my problem and the reason for this post is do to the fact Lady put what happened on facebook. Most of the commenters are on her side.

So am I the asshole for taking my child home?

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