this post was submitted on 27 Feb 2025
768 points (99.0% liked)
Greentext
5281 readers
2156 users here now
This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.
Be warned:
- Anon is often crazy.
- Anon is often depressed.
- Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.
If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
In high school I had a crush on this girl who had something on her Facebook about really liking gummy worms. I read that, thought "this is my in" so I bought a bag of gummy worms. Honestly, not a bad plan. Next time I saw her, I pulled out my bag of gummy worms and ate a couple.
Did I offer her a gummy worm? No. I was under the impression that she'd see me eating them and say "hey, you like gummy worms too?" And then we'd start chatting and [something] and then we'd start going out.
Well, clearly it wouldn't work. You should instead act like you hate gummy worms and give them to her to get rid of them.
And theeeeennnn...?
We continued to be friendly acquaintances because I never actually made a move 🤷♂️
Awwww damn...
I went through my girlfrriend's cashier lane at the grocery store for 3 years before fingering out how to get her number without not being just another dick rolling through when she has an endless supply to choose from. Turned out she had been waiting the entire time for something to happen
He developed a gummy worm addiction and became morbidly obese, leaving the work force and receiving a disability pension.
Nature is fine with failure, it is expected.