this post was submitted on 08 Feb 2025
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[–] [email protected] 79 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Friend: “You should try these bagels.”

That guy: “Oh, no thanks, I have work in an hour.”

Friend: “Huh?”

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

Bonus points if the bagel has poppy seeds.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Shows up to a bring your own booze party with a baguette 🥖

[–] [email protected] 63 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This seems to be a lot like PGAD (persistent genital arousal disorder) in that the experience is not at all as pleasant as the name makes it seem, but rather an unending horror for those who suffer it.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I got stuck with a boner for a whole night, it fucking sucked. I didn't even take anything. It just happened. It felt like someone was stabbing my taint.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Holy shit, that sounds like priapism, and depending on the type, could cause loss of dick.

Priapism Wiki

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah, no. I was considering the hospital the entire time. At first, I thought it was one of those boners you get from sleeping on your belly, so I fell asleep. When I woke up, I was still at full mast and throbbing. I was half asleep, though, so I just kinda laid there thinking to myself, "Do I really need to go to the hospital for this boner right now?" I probably should've, but my sleep deprived brain told me, "Why don't you try to sleep on it?" Pun intended.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Gives new meaning to sleep it off?

[–] [email protected] 41 points 1 month ago (1 children)

My ex had it and it's the reason we broke up. Being drunk all the time/at random and not aware is problematic to say the least.

[–] [email protected] 42 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It's sad, because it's a disability, but I totally understand.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

For many it's a disability. For alcoholics it's a super power.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago

every hospital/medical TV show has an episode about this.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Rocks up to a party with a 12 pack of rolls

WHO'S READY TO GET FUCKED UP! WOOOOOOOOOO!

*scoffs down roll*

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago

I wonder if this guy has paperwork that explains his condition. Because it isn't widely known, I don't expect any cop would accept it as legitimate. What an unfortunate situation.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago

When auto-growery?

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What does one have to do to gain this power?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Yeast enemas

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

Isn't that just called "being french"?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'd love to have a condition that turns a PB&J into a cocktail.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Show up to a BYO party with a baguette

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Bring your own bread.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

I wonder how this impacted his professional life before and after he found out.