I suspected this probably wasn't the first time. Definitely frustrating. I wish there was some other video sharing site that offered what YouTube did without the evil part.
Sombyr
Honestly, I'm even more scared for my other girlfriend than myself. She's part Chinese and people she knows have already been abducted by ICE.
Fatal familial insomnia keeps me up at night.
I can relate in several ways. One day I woke up to my step mom screaming and my dad screaming at her and the sound of things being thrown around. He was super drunk, and when he came out of his room, I pulled a knife on him, but he was too out of it to notice. That or he had and just never told me. Before I got it in me to move, he started crying, hugged me, and kept repeating "I'll get better" over and over again. After that day he started going to regular therapy. Religious therapy, not real therapy, but it never happened again, so I guess it worked either way. Nonetheless I can't bring myself to ever step foot in his house again. I've talked to him over messaging before during some emergency situations where I had nobody else I could call. He seems like he's really improved. But tbh, I don't think I'll ever be able to fully trust that he's genuinely changed. Because of him my stomach still drops whenever I hear sudden loud noises, even if it's just somebody dropping a screwdriver or something.
I'm in neither camp personally. I overheard my dad joke to my mom about how the best time to stop beating your kids is when they're old enough to fight back, and so I learned to fight against it, physically. Of course he didn't stop at first, I was small and weak, until one day soon after I cut his eye with my fingernail. That's when he finally decided to tone it down.
And yet when that happened, I wasn't happy. I thought I was a monster for putting him in the hospital.
I feel like kids are pressured to much to find love and get married before they're even sure what love is. Not sure if this is an unpopular opinion, but we gotta stop telling kids that true love is a feeling or that "they'll know it when they find it."
In actuality, you can never be sure a relationship will succeed or if it's "true" love. Real "true" love isn't just a feeling, is the result of an already successful relationship. It's when you make it for years and years and have had time to grow together and you find that you've been able to grow with each other enough to have confidence that it's going to continue to work.
When you teach kids to rely only on their feelings and not look at things objectively, every love starts to look like true love to them, trapping themself in a relationship, even when they end up hating their partner, which when everyone's doing it just becomes the norm, never questioning if things could be better.
NH is the weirdest, most inconsistent state in New England policy and law wise. Transgender rights are especially bizarre. They tried to ban us from bathrooms a few times and yet their transgender medicaid policies are some of the best in the country, covering electrolysis, which is fairly rare in the US, and even covers some cosmetic procedures like breast augmentation.
Vermont is weird similarly, having a significant amount of republicans and yet being one of the most progressive states in the country. New England states feel like they're having a perpetual identity crisis politics wise.
Ah, I missed that because I have lemmy.world blocked. You make good points.
Speaking as somebody who pretransition started a free fall down that pipeline, I do wanna point something out about that.
TLDR: Men are taught to bottle things up, manosphere let's them address their bottled up problems by lying and telling them it's women's fault exclusively.
The general consensus is that the rise is caused by societal issues and conventions which expect men to stay silent about their feelings and issues, and resolve them on their own without help. The manosphere offers a space where they can be heard and gives them an actionable solution to the issue (as men are taught to seek.)
The problem is that "actionable solution" is to lie and say it's all women's fault, and that if they harrass and dominate women, then the problem will magically go away. It's a more tangible solution than "society has issues and you could play a small part in helping it, but you can't fix it on your own because you can't control other's actions."
Men assume whatever solution is more tangible must be the right one.
I say all this just because I feel it's important to understand what's going on in their heads if we're gonna combat it. I also want to point out that I know what I described here is the patriarchy, but I avoid using the word because even if it's the proper term, it's very easily misunderstood, and when something is misunderstood more often then not by those who need to hear it most, it ceases to be a good tool for communication.
Maybe I'm preaching to the choir, I dunno.
I would also add the vulnerability of male children to the list of things they never bring up except as a weapon. young boys are often treated by society as if they're just mini adults, to the point where nobody looks twice if their sexually harassed or assaulted. But men never bring this up in an attempt to change it. It's only ever used as an ammo to fling at women and say "actually, we're just as if not more oppressed."
As a trans woman who dealt with that pretransition, that one really stings to me. Nobody cares about helping people like me, we're just a weapon to be used.
The problem I have with men, especially on Lemmy, is they have plenty of men's issues they could be calling attention to to try to actually change things, but instead of that they use them as weapons against women, and make no real attempt to fix their issues lest they lose their ammunition.
I'm pretty sure I've only ever once used the word cis on any other occasion, but I can't even find the video it was a comment on anymore to check if my comment is still there. It was a short about trying to explain to cis people why cis wasn't a slur. I don't know if I'm blind or it's genuinely gone.
You might be right though. Albeit I'd find it odd for the Onion to be blocking trans related words in a video explicitly about trans people, but it could explain why my first comment was up for 10 minutes or so before vanishing. But the first time it wasn't shadow banned, it was completely gone, even on my end, so I suspect it was manually removed.