Asklemmy

I never had a social life, either romantic or platonic, and I'm wondering if anyone else has gone from 0 social life to an active one past college. Like I wasted college just going to classes and I graduated already. Thoughts?

for those who find this hard to read, it’s like my dad. he grew up in peru but by the border between peru and brazil, so he picked up portuguese.

these 2 sentences have me thinking:

1. I cannot change what others think about me or do, I can only change how to react to it.

2. It’s not my fault, but it is my problem to deal with.

we had a merger and my department met our new manager. He seemed empathetic and approachable, asking us to stay at our current positions and work together.

I've been considering a change for some time because I don't get along with some coworkers, even though most are fine, but these 3 suck the life out of me.

So I sent this new manager an application that was rejected the next day:

"mr. X doesn't want to consider your application."

He didn't even read it. He seemed so approachable and friendly... this line seems specifically written to make me feel bad, or maybe I'm very thin skinned?

An adult would accept it and move on, but I'm so thin skinned I keep ruminating about it. I want to change how I react to this and other setbacks in life, but I feel powerless.

"It’s not my fault, but it is my problem to deal with"

I'm on the spectrum. I can hold a job, pay rent and healthcare, max my 401k..., but some of my coworkers find me robotic and rude and feel offended if I want to concentrate on my duties instead of talking to them, simply because if I don't do my job I'll be fired.

Not all of my coworkers are like this, but some simply don't see that I do the same they do, except gossiping and bantering, which I find a waste of time.

They feel offended because I like to keep to myself.

It is not fair and I hate it, but it is, apparently, my problem to deal with.

Except that I don't know how to deal with it. And I don't want to deal with it, because it is unfair that what others think and talk about you makes your career more difficult.

I didn't expect this post to be this long.

Wikipedia defines common sense as "knowledge, judgement, and taste which is more or less universal and which is held more or less without reflection or argument"

Try to avoid using this topic to express niche or unpopular opinions (they're a dime a dozen) but instead consider provable intuitive facts.

This quote captures a rule I'd like to live my life, and by extension my career by. I'd like to have a job where every day looks different because you respond to whatever eventualities arise. What is a good way to find these?

I'm not asking for specific job positions (although feel free to suggest some) because I imagine such positions exist in most fields — I'm rather asking for ways to find these/filter for these in a given field.

Like, if its collapsed, do I file? Do I even have to?

I am most certainly going to pay my state tax, but then what? What about stuff like my social security funds?

(I am asking for others because we're at that point now I suppose)

I don't want to share too much personal stuff, which i personally think in my probably stupid opinion, makes this post entirely pointless. I have a lot of i guess weird or extreme opinions or beliefs. I've never really expected people to believe in my beliefs, just to understand how I view the world. It often times feels like it is too much, to keep hoping that others will attempt to understand. Thankfully i have a few people who seem to understand for now. I am very left leaning. I think, i've been told im both far right and far left i don't know anymore. i've been told im capitalist, anarchist, communist, socialist and a whole bunch of other ist's and ism's i don't remember. And i've struggled up and down with whether or not im intelligent or not. I used to think i was a moron, and with trump, the fact most people don't read and i was just an average reader in school i guess i come off as. im not sure what word im looking for. I guess i come off as rude sometimes. But i know at least what a tarriff is. But the more i view the world. The i feel better not looking on social media. Not looking as much to replies on posts, not really engaging with anyone other than those i know somewhat well already that can deal with me, and are open enough to tell me when im too much to deal with and they need time away.

When it comes to sharing my ideas for solutions to problems in the world, with lots of people, i seem to get lots of pushback, i can understnad on some of my ideas, but some of them are ideas lots of people have too.

I don't really want to share those more far left ideas i have, but i wonder if maybe i should shut up and stop sharing anything because i hear sometimes my ideas are just damaging progress or something. The thing is, im not surprised by 2024-2025. It feels more like events were already set there to begin with, and i knew this the whole time but i didn't want to admit these things. i think a lot of people didn't want to admit this was possible and thats part of why we're here. And that is one opinion i've lost friends and people over. Is the truth something that we just can't handle anymore? Am i just totally wrong and stupid? I don't know anymore. I'm not even sure im looking for an answer. And probably, there is no answer or answers to these thoughts.

How would you answer this, and how would you expect Chinese netizens on Xiaohongshu to answer?

I will link to the thread in the comments because I want you to take a moment and think about it first.

Last weekend I was at Transmediale in Berlin, a pathetic spectacle of a crumbling media art/media critique/techno-political conference. Nonetheless, one of the talks by Silvio Lorusso was quite good and it was investigating, among other things, the hidden labor within video calls, the affective consequences of having to be on camera within your domestic space and other consequences of "zoom culture".

This made me think that in some political spaces there's a strong sentiment against using webcams, while in others, holding similar values, there's a strong sentiment against keeping the webcam off.

I believe the first position is mainly stemming from the trauma and discomfort of remote work, where the context of the workplace and your employer extraction of labor make some demands around webcams illegitimate, or extractive. This might not apply to the political context, but the trauma or simply the habit of being hostile towards the webcam demands is still there.

Let me summarize briefly the arguments from both sides:

Against webcams:

• webcams demand you to be presentable and make your space presentable. It's extra labor, especially for women.
• webcams highlight differences in lifestyle and privilege among the participants
• webcams have mild to serious impacts on people with different forms of body and gender dysphoria, alienating people even before they join the space. Also, they distract narcissists from the call.
• for specific activities, visual cues of the reactions of participants might impact the formulation of arguments by specific people, especially if insecure or shy. With the webcam off, you might not be able to read the room but sometimes it's a good thing.

In favor of webcams:

• they create intimacy and a stronger sense of presence. We can debate if this is a good thing at work overall, but it's obviously a good thing in political spaces. There's no collective action without this. they help you read the room and enrich communication, at least for those who are good at doing it.
• they help us position and frame the other person. Probably this should be a "neutral" point, because it enables both positive and negative biases. It depends on your beliefs and if you think that "unbiased=good" or "unbiased=bad".

I would like to hear from you how political organizations you've been have handled this discussion, if they did. How you feel about it. Also, I would like to hear if anybody experienced specific practices around turning the webcam on or off for specific activities, which to me seems an under-explored area, both for production purposes or political purposes.

In my case, did think about exercising the legs more and have started a bit.

Apparently, some schools in the U.S. didn't teach phonics until recently (2014).

Did anyone here learn phonics in school?

I used to believe he was an aggressive racist man who tried to keep black players out of the league as violently as possible, giving rise to media like Soundgarden's Ty Cobb

But I'm now reading through his Wikipedia article, and I can't quite work him out.

• https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ty_Cobb

He's definitely aggressive, and has a "hard-headed fuck-you-all" attitude to life. It looks like the racist allegations against him might have just been slander caused by another player (Schmidt).

There's one altercation he has with a cement worker whose work he ruined by stepping in it, and then escalated into something more.... but as far as I can see that's it.

He just seems like a good player who's a bit heavy handed and loud mouthed, and fights anyone who he perceives does him wrong, regardless of background or skin color.

There's one story that made me giggle a bit:

Cobb climbed into the stands and attacked Lucker, who it turned out was handicapped (he had lost all of one hand and three fingers on his other hand in an industrial accident).

Some onlookers shouted at him to stop because the man had no hands, to which Cobb reportedly retorted, "I don't care if he got no feet!"

According to Russo, the crowd cheered Cobb on in the fight. Though extremely rare in the 21st century, attacking fans was not so unusual an activity in the early years of baseball.

It costs over a thousand USD to take some ocean liners.

What are alternative ways that are cheaper, and how would one go about it?

(No planes)

For context, I know someone who went from China to California by freight ship in the 1990s by bribing the captain with beer and their cooking skills.

I across this interesting page on Wikipedia called "Characters With Narcissistic Personality Disorder" and I was very surprised by the characters that will included. I never thought of Patrick Bateman or Bender as having NPD before. There are some obvious ones like the Wicked Witch from Snow White and Gaston from Beauty And The Beast but are there any others.

What kind of things could a person carry to sell and how if they ever had to forcibly leave?

I read diamonds are worthless second hand.

Solid gold seems legit but not sure if coins or jeweler is best.

I saw something about getting gold chains to trade individual links in a emergency.

Are there any other good tips?

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Edit: Put in a Consolidation effort based on comments and side research

1. Jewelery is good getting through customs as some countries have limits on what you can take over borders. Canada for example has 10k limit before you have to delcare and it is not clear if per person.

1.a) Always buy jewelry you plan to wear anyway because you will not get full value back.

1.b) Buy from reputable locations. Looks like Mene was a popular one.

2. Gold coins are good but get normal ones like Eagles, Buffalo, or Maple as it's easier to sell. Fancy ones are cool as collector item but will require more haggling.

2a) Bars are cheaper over spot but can be harder to sell overall

2b) Seems like libertycoin had consistent reviews.

3. Cash is light but if your origin country currency dips then it's worthless.

4. Crypto requires you to have your wallet seed and importantly access to a pc and electricity.

5. Make sure to have a backup skil/trade to live off of.

6. Transferring money between banks can have legal issues.

The basket occasionally went in the dishwasher which cleaned the surface, but the well gunked grease has been building up.

Tried soaking the basket in soap and hot water. Scrubbing with a soft sponge. And then running the dishwasher multiple times but it only got a small part of the grease out.

I was thinking some transparent filler maybe, and grinding/polishing it down? There's some varnish on the wood anyway.

how much could minor shoplifting add to the economy if: 

• it was only targeting businesses that ship their profits offshore and/or avoid paying local taxes;
• the shoplifted items were items that were going to be purchased; and
• monetary savings redistributed to local businesses?

I was reading a book, The Victorian Internet, which talked about how connected the Victorian era was, with wires stretching everywhere above the roads. It's probably exaggerated, but it got me thinking. There are many ways to engage in en masse interconnectivity. Computers, of course, are one of them, but we also have had, for example, messenger pigeons, drones we can send to different places, search dogs with an interconnected sniff system (I forgot what that was called), etc.

Suppose you had a civilization. Maybe it's on a planet whose environment interferes with the capabilities of a classic internet, or maybe it's a normal fantasy setting where the classic internet is cursed. However, the civilization still needs some kind of apparatus of interconnectivity. What's the best/closest thing you can think of as a replacement for the internet without it being the internet as we know it?

I've begun to wonder about this question. There's nothing implied in the existence of the fediverse that it will include every site, and there's nothing implied in the existence of every non-fediverse site which would stop them from forming their own fediverse. One could technically say email providers have already achieved this, though this only really applies to email providers which doesn't make it as useful as the fediverse we know and love. Are there actually other fediverses out there?

I made a new community for art in the style of the old roast subs and was wondering. It tends to make people feel better about what they've made to hear about what others have.

Here are some examples from me:

12-15?-24 Suchir Balaji whistleblower against openai dies

12-9/19-2024 ufo sightings mostly in new jersey

12-10-2024 Briana Boston gets 15 years for saying you all are next over the phone to a health care company

12-04-2024 uhc ceo killed everyone loves the killer, Luigi Mangione

11-05-2024 trump wins the election, kamala stood for nothing the whole time

boeing planes fail and two whistle blowers are killed

03-09-2024 first John “Mitch” Barnett, shot himself

04-30-2024 second Joshua Dean, shot himself in the head

two US soldiers burn themselves in protest

09-11-2024 Matt Nelson sets himself on fire in boston by israeli consolute

02-25-2024 Aaron Bushnell suicide by gas in front of israeli consolute in dc for palestine

12-01-2023, unknown woman, protestor at atlanta consolute does the same

03-02-2024 mask protest ban in NC

10-7-23 hamas fights back against israel

Train explosion in east Palestine Ohio destroying the city

02-24-2022 russia invades ukraine

08-10-2019 epstein kills himself supposedly