Sadly, this is not the Onion.

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For true stories that you could have sworn were from The Onion.

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126

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‘It makes no sense,’ Toronto building had to tell its residents to stop throwing feces at electrical workers (nowtoronto.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Character-Error5426 on 2024-07-25 00:55:58.

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No, JD Vance did not have sex with a couch (apnews.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/gonuxgo on 2024-07-25 00:37:35.

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Suspect who stole Seattle fire engine arrested after being unable to deactivate parking brake (www.king5.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/snowypotato on 2024-07-25 00:28:45.

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Delco elementary teacher accused of masturbating at Whitemarsh Cemetery in Ambler (northpennnow.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Forward-Answer-4407 on 2024-07-24 19:35:14.

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Shark euthanized after biting person in West Des Moines (www.kcrg.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/IowaKidd97 on 2024-07-24 18:04:52.

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CrowdStrike offers $10 Uber Eats gift card to partners as apology for global IT outage (www.datacenterdynamics.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Raddigan on 2024-07-24 17:54:02.

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Italian town joins mayor on walks to lose weight blamed on his ‘convivial obligations’ (www.theguardian.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/PauloPatricio on 2024-07-24 16:08:16.

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‘Skibidi Toilet’ Film and TV Franchise in the Works From Michael Bay, Adam Goodman — Listen to the Exclusive Interview (variety.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Hamzaboy on 2024-07-24 15:23:41.

134

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KnowBe4 reveals it accidentally hired a North Korean hacker (www.cyberdaily.au)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/dect60 on 2024-07-24 15:21:46.

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A woman who was given the Freedom of the City of London for her disability campaigning was unable to collect the award on stage due lack of accessible ramp (www.bbc.co.uk)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/ineedmoredata on 2024-07-24 14:36:47.

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Chris Brown sued for $50 million for allegedly 'beating four fans' after concert (www.the-express.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/yourhighuncle on 2024-07-24 14:20:48.

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'Haley Voters for Harris' pledge to fight on after Nikki Haley says cease and desist (www.npr.org)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/StickHead9865 on 2024-07-24 13:59:20.

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A Florida school district banned ‘Ban This Book.’ Author says that’s ‘erasure of the highest order’ and wants it reinstated (www.cnn.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Lvexr on 2024-07-24 12:21:25.

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Chris Brown sued for $50 million for allegedly 'beating four fans' after concert (www.the-express.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/hateful_virago on 2024-07-24 12:08:08.

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Chinese companies offer to 'resurrect' deceased loved ones with AI avatars (www.npr.org)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/GetOffMyGrassBrats on 2024-07-24 11:46:12.

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Fish falls from sky and damages couple's Tesla in Atlantic Highlands (abc7ny.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/acomp182 on 2024-07-24 10:58:17.

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Trash dropped by a North Korean balloon falls on South Korea’s presidential compound (apnews.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/gixk on 2024-07-24 10:42:47.

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Some Republicans are threatening legal challenges to keep Biden on the ballot. But will they work? (www.cbsnews.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Le_Botmes on 2024-07-24 08:50:57.

Ask and ye shall receive

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Men may not be more attracted to scent of fertile women, study says (www.theguardian.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/EverSoInfinite on 2024-07-24 08:20:52.

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Indian priests invoke heavenly powers for Kamala Harris (www.straitstimes.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/fjhforever on 2024-07-24 07:46:11.

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Team GB athlete Charlotte Dujardin pulls out of Paris Olympics after 'whipping horse 24 times' (news.sky.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Fluffy-Call1399 on 2024-07-24 06:51:47.

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Florida sheriff apologizes after posting photo of dead body on Instagram (www.tampabay.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/jamcdonald120 on 2024-07-24 06:41:43.

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Israel parliament votes to label UN relief agency a terror organisation. (www.middleeastmonitor.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/WetSandyJello on 2024-07-24 06:40:34.

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Lauren Boebert repeatedly demands Joe Biden proves he's not dead (www.newsweek.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Real-Work-1953 on 2024-07-24 04:58:47.

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Fish falls from sky and damages New Jersey couple's Tesla in driveway (6abc.com)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/skateboardom on 2024-07-24 02:53:41.