this post was submitted on 22 Mar 2025
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Probably just someone without well calibrated facial expressions. Learned to be very stoic and show no emotions.
Easiest way to find out would be to just ask him what he's thinking when he looks so seriously at you, though I understand that's probably very scary.
Yes I thought about it, but the weirdest for me is not smiling back at me. That's what typically happens even with strangers, no? I happen to smile at someone I'll never see again and they smile back, it just happens and I'm not the most social person myself... But in this case we bump into each other frequently, he will nod or say hi but smiling NEVER
There's also autistic people that have completely different social responses, including not smiling when looking at someone. That doesn't mean they don't wanna be friendly.
I'm not saying that's the case here, and you always have to watch out for abnormal social responses, but if you deem someone safe to approach, talking is simply usually the best way to find out about people.
I'm in this boat, I just look pissed all the time and it takes a lot to get an actual smile from me. I used to try and fake it a lot but I wasn't good at it so it made people even more uncomfortable.
He hasn't hit the threshold of emotion necessarily to cause a smile response. Your threshold is so low that you smile just by looking at someone.
Why his smile threshold is where it is can be due to many factors like culture, abuse, trauma, state of being, mental state, social conditioning, etc.
There is a Russian saying that states "A man who smiles without reason is mad(insane)." Give him a reason to smile.
Haha you're right, I just hope it's not bc of me 😔
I'd love to make him smile but I'm afraid I might cross a line, I really don't understand if I've bothered him in that past
You have two options.
Option 1: You keep overthinking and never approach him because you think he is a certain way. All downsides in a small scale.
Option 2: You talk to him, be direct, and you get to find out who he is. Either he has no interest for whatever reason or you find a great guy. I guess he could secretly be a serial killer or like fights dogs, but finding that out is just part of what makes dating fun.
Let me let you in on an open secret, girls have a far higher success rate approaching guys than the other way around. So if he, or any guy, appeals to you just fucking approach him and be direct. Eye contact and giving looks aren't signs that tell a guy a girl is interested. We are conditioned to believe a girl being nice is just a girl being nice and to ignore anything but the most obvious and direct indications of romantic interest. Seriously, just walk up to a dude and say "I think you're cute/attractive, want to go out sometime?" Very high chance of success if he is single and you aren't a 2 that just crawled out of a swamp trying for a 10.
Is he staring at you or just in your general direction. Sometimes I'll just look in a direction and let my mind wander - eyes are open but not seeing anything because I'm in my head. And people who don't smile can have a variety of reasons to do so.
Best thing you can do is ignore it and not dwell. Otherwise, just ask him. He knows best. "Hey, I saw you staring off into the distance, anything on your mind?" or ask him what kind of things he thinks are funny, if anything funny happened to him lately, maybe prefix it with something that you saw or happened to you that you found funny. "I watched COMEDIAN last night. They're my favorite. Do you watch comedy?" or something else.
I just wouldn't be too direct about him not laughing or smiling. It may come off as "smile more princess" and could piss him off - I know it would piss me off. But asking me about stuff that I like and am interested in can get a smile on my face. It could on him too.
No he's looking at me when this happens, straight into my eyes and might say hi or nod, depends, but I just wish I knew what he thinks of me
Ask him. We can't know ;)
Nah, it can happen. I tend to look rather gloomy, so I need to remind myself to smile when looking at my wife, otherwise she'll think I'm angry with her when I'm just thinking about stuff.