this post was submitted on 05 Jun 2023
58 points (88.2% liked)

Asklemmy

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 years ago
[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 years ago
[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 years ago

I die with a smile on my face

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I get shot by richard stallman

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

Spagettigification🫠

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

Sounds like a long, painful way to go

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

There's worse ways to go I guess

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

Depends... Are you going to die from giving or from receiving one? Or in other words: who's bob?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

Considering the anime she's from, probably violently with one half of a large scissor.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Died fighting for freedom of technology and the destruction of corporations

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

Not at all! People are gonna be pissed at the devs and they'll patch my death scene right out of the game, or at least make it optional. I'm immortal, baby!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago

Heart attack from yelling at my computer screen, I guess

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)

killed in a crusade (shoe-ade?) started by a cult of spiders that have a shoe as their holy symbol, in order to liberate the promised shoe (due to the sheer scale, the item doubles as both symbol and holy land)

could be worse, I guess

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

I get assasinated by oracle for not owning a Solaris license and my death is ruled out as a suicide. Alternatively i get thrown into the sun somehow

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

If I must die to a fork, it'd be funny if it was this one.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

It's shocking.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Shit, I'm choking and I can't see... what direction am I going?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

Into the void I go

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Not too bad, im alive in practice

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

Hit by a car. Which, statistically, is probably a solid guess

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

I think it would actually be pretty long and painful :(

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago (7 children)

My name is just my name… idk what that means πŸ˜₯

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Same, I guess I have to fight an evil clone of myself or something.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

I'm still confused if it's going to be bad or trippy.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

I died as I lived

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

Oh god oh fuck

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

In a bombastic manner

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Corrupted DNA, so most likely either cancer or radiation. The latter being not the greatest way to go...

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

at least there's dirt

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

Some wanker on a bike

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago (2 children)

I honestly have no idea, which opens up a whole world of possibilities!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Death by 304 minor injuries?

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

A. I'm okay with it B. I'm not okay with it. C. I haven't a clue what it means. D. Maybe it means suicide, if so, I guess that is the choice I made?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

I guess that might mean lightsabers are real. You’re welcome, everyone.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

I do love clean socks....

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

My username is the German version of a jackalope, so I guess I'm going out monty python style.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

I'm allergic... it's going to be unpleasant.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

It's either going to hurt really bad or it's going to happen so quickly I won't know what happened.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

I'm imagining the chest-burster scene from alien, but a it's a Weasel dressed as a caricature of an early 20th century monopolist.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

Brayed to death by an Argentinian descendant of the African Wild Ass.

no bueno.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

My existence triggers undefined behavior in the laws of physics, causing the universe to glitch for a moment and then collapse entirely. Everyone alive at the time is trapped for eternity, unable to move or do anything, and sees nothing but some cryptic words suspended in an endless black void:

Segmentation fault (core dumped)
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