Am I the Asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/SeraphineWhisperGirl on 2024-01-18 07:55:53+00:00.

I (19F) have this friend of mine that have been in my life for almost 11 years. He (22M) Have been in love with me for as long as i can remember, but i have always just seen him as a friend and have let him know that. I have rejected him multiple times and even tho i tried backing him down nicely eventually i got tired and just "allowed" him keep flirting with me (big mistake).

For 3 years i left my country to live with my father in the U.S but ever since i came back he has been on my back trying to flirt even more. It really annoys me because i see him as a brother not as lover; one day he came up to me and gave me a present, a ring. I thought to myself that it would be a bad decision to accept but that day i was really tiered so i just accepted it and went home (again, big mistake). The next few weeks he started treating me like his girlfriend even tho i wasn't; it felt really wierd but i tried to shrugg it off. He also kept trying to kiss me, which i tried declining but sometimes he would catch me off guard and kiss me (a peck). I felt mad and helpless because even tho i didn't want that i was scared to be rude and break his heart by refusing it even more.

You see,I'm a very considerate and generous person and sometiI'm toomes nice to peolple and they take advantage of me because of that. So when hebegan doing that to me i felt helpless because i didn't want to hurt him, but eventually i had to end that. Not long after the kisses started i decided to write big text to him explaining how i couldn't and didn't wanted to date anyone (which was true) because i wasn't in a good moment of my life. I tried being nice and not rude or cruel and explaining everything nicely and all he responded me was an "ok".

I think i've hurted him and possible distroyed our 11 year friendship.

AITA for "breaking up" with my "boyfriend"?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Bee_Kevics on 2024-01-18 07:53:07+00:00.

I’m (18F) in technical college, learning photography. This year I have to do my graduation, like everyone else in a regular college. I’m also taking acting classes outside of school, which takes a lot of energy and time away from me. Don’t get me wrong, I love what I’m doing, it just gets tiring sometimes. I have a classmate (also 18F) who went to elementary school with me. We’re gonna call her Jess. Today me and my classmate who we’ll call Erika (18F) were the last ones to use the school’s studio for a task. Since the whole group had one camera and one SD card on them we asked our classmates to tell us when they were finished, so we can go and do our turn. Jess said sure, but later on when everybody was finished, she didn’t tell us that the studio is free, she started taking more pictures for herself (even though she knew our work is still undone). When the teacher asked if Erika and I were done and we said no, he said that we have to do the project at home or somewhere else, because the lesson is done and he has to go. Erika asked Jess why she didn’t tell us that the studio was free to use and she said, because she needed to take some pictures for her instagram. We were obviously pissed, but couldn’t do anything, so I packed my things and left for my next class. Jess stopped me in the hallways and told me that I have to relax, it’s not a big deal and I can still do the projekt tomorrow. And if I weren’t studying that many things, maybe I wouldn’t stress about small things like this and I’d have time to focus on my schoolwork and myself better (my acting classes are on the weekends and I’m one of the best students in my class). I told her that maybe she should mind her own business and tell me next time if the studio is free instead of using it when she is already done. She got mad and told me that it was not her responsibility and that she only used the studio, because nobody needed it (we needed it). Now she is not talking to me or Erika either, because she thinks that she is right and I should’ve not said these things to her. She’s been bullying me since elementary school, but I mention something to her, which I think is reasonable, and she gets mad. So tell me, am I the asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Dry-Prune8904 on 2024-01-18 07:36:34+00:00.

I have been seeing this lady for the past two to three months and all this lady has done is to get me pretty mad. She always has something negative to say about me and I hate her so much. I started seeing her after my previous therapist named "Megan" quit working to go back to school. She was an intern and she was the perfect match for me. Megan was nice and kind and considerate of my feelings. This current lady, her name is Sally and she is just a total tool. She has been bugging me for the past 3 months for me to close my youtube channel to focus on my mental health, specifically she wants me to take down this huge controversial film that I made. I refused to do so even after getting suspended on Youtube for copyright infringement, I created a new channel and reuploaded my content again. This got people really mad to the point where I gained a huge huge bad reputation online and people see me in a very negative way. I told her yesterday that one of my friends named Matt stopped talking to me suddenly and she says its my fault. I tried calling matt for the past few days and he never answered and then he sent me a text saying he is too busy and doesn't know when he will be able to talk again. I talked to her about it and she bashed me and said "Well its your fault that you got cancel culture to come after you. I've told you explicitly for the past few months to take down that film but you refused to do so and so now you are facing the consequences. Matt probably got wind about your film and your nasty and stalker-ish behavior online and so he is distancing himself. People don't want to associate with people who have a negative image cause they are afraid that they will be viewed the same way as well.". She said she doesn't feel sorry for me. I told Sally that she is a total tool and that she needs to go back to school and get another career. I told her that she is a unprofessional tool bag prick. She got mad and kicked me out of the office again. AITA for going off on her like that ??

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Ogaquafina on 2024-01-18 07:30:52+00:00.

MIL watched my 20 month old tonight and she had to put him to sleep. She asked if she could give him a blanket and we told her no. It wasn’t much of a conversation but she asked and we were straightforward about not giving him one. But of course, when we got back, he had a blanket in his crib. He has never slept with one before and I didn’t want him with one for the first time overnight because I can’t keep an eye on him.

I told her that she overstepped by doing something I said no to. She argued with me saying it’s too cold for him to sleep without one and she just wanted to do what was best. I told her as the Mom, I know what’s best and that if he’s dressed warmly he’s fine without a blanket. She basically disagreed and said it was unfair that I’m making it seem like she’s done something with ill intent when all she wanted was for him to be comfortable. I told her that if I say no to something regarding my child and she does it anyway, it is ill intent as she’s doing something I haven’t agreed to.

AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/VanGogh1853 on 2024-01-18 07:16:58+00:00.

Yesterday in my UX/UI design class, we were assigned group projects for mock case studies. After individually pitching potential case studies, we voted on the top four topics that would be our projects for the semester. I sit at the front so I'm closer to the white board, so I and the other students at the front were able to write our names down first. The second most popular choice filled up quickly too. This left the remaining students with the two less popular choices.

My group exceeded the maximum size, so one person had to switch to the other group. The last person who joined my group voluntarily moved to the third most popular option, and the least most popular option had one person, leaving Nina as the only student without a group. Nina preferred our topic and argued with the prof for about ten minutes to join our group despite it being over the limit.

I was getting fed up soon enough, so I told Nina "it's a school project, it's not that big of a deal". Nina then turned to me and said "well then why don't you switch with me? since it's not that big of a deal?" to which I refused because I picked my topic first. Although I didn't feel connected to my chosen topic either, I didn't see it as a problem. Eventually, another member from the second group moved to Nina's group, and she reluctantly joined that group.

The next day, Nina was distant and hardly looked at me in class. While my friends assured me that Nina shouldn't have asked me to switch, they also believed I should have kept my mouth shut and let the prof handle it. Tired of the situation, I wonder if I am in the wrong for not switching with Nina. So AITA for not switching groups?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/JayJay_Dulay on 2024-01-18 07:10:20+00:00.

I (17F) met my boyfriend (16M) late June 2023. Let’s call my bf Tom and his best friend Jerry(16M). I had met Tom through a toxic fling who we’ll call Micheal (18M). Micheal and I were on and off and it was clear he was only using me for my body while I was very in love with him. Eventually me and Micheal decided to end the fling and stay friends. Around this time is when I started getting closer with Tom. Eventually a friendship between me and Tom turned into flirting and we got closer until we transitioned into a talking stage. At this point we’d only known each other for about a month and I wanted to take things slow. For some reason all of Tom’s friends were adamant on me and him immediately dating which made me uncomfortable, especially because I was still getting over Micheal. I slowly pushed Tom away because of this and wanted to be just friends again. During this time me and Micheal stopped being friends officially.

Eventually Micheal started telling people that I was leading Tom on for my pleasure. Tom didn’t know who to believe so it became a very stressful situation. Eventually Micheal succeeded in convincing Tom that I was manipulating him and everyone including Tom cut me off. I was upset but I eventually got over it. One day me and Micheal got into an argument and I had confessed to using Micheal’s best friend who’s also 18 for revenge (pleasure). Micheal screenshotted that part of the argument and edited it to make it look like I said I used Tom. I knew he’d send it to Tom so I texted him before he could receive the screenshot and clarified everything. Eventually me and Tom talked and I gave him all the proof I could for my innocence. We became close again and eventually returned to our talking stage. Most of Tom’s friends realized Micheal was lying and cut him off as well. Most… Jerry is still convinced that I’m manipulative and that one day I’ll cheat on Tom. He sends thirst tiktoks I had made before me and Tom even met as well as an old Tinder account I made while me and Tom stopped talking. Tom knows about all of these things and I always reassure him I have nothing to hide. He has asked Jerry multiple times to stop stalking and harassing us and budding into our relationship but Jerry always refuses and says one day Tom will learn why he’s doing this. I started talking to Tom about how I think Jerry is a bad friend because he has no respect for him. Over time Jerry has proven this more and more to a point when Tom said he doesn’t want to talk to Jerry when he acts this way Jerry responded with “then don’t.” I have been trying to convince Tom to stop being friends with Jerry but it’s hard for him since they had been friends since elementary school. I don’t try to be mean about it, but I don’t like that Tom keeps him around. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Venture825 on 2024-01-18 07:05:13+00:00.

Me (M16) and my father (59) often have arguments about the electricity cost in the house. He’s a super electricity guy, with an EV (which I don’t mind), he’s invested in a solar wind farm.

But some things he does really makes me despise it. Sometimes he will put us in for “blackout” sessions, where we have to turn off all the lights and plugs (usually around 5PM) for an hour so he can earn around £1 for it. The thing that really annoys me is when he sets limits on stuff because of electricity usage. We have an older gen Xbox with a tv attached to it, and he only allows around an hour a day because of “electricity costs”. I’ve spoken about how this is ridiculous since nobody else does this but he just seems to argue back. I’m also going to be getting a gaming pc with my own money, and he wants to set limits on how much I can go on that too because of “electricity costs”. I’ve once again told him that no one else does this, and it’s my money. I have also offered him to pay my share of how much I use in the electricity bills but he won’t go for it. I also ask him about how much I’m using compared to him and he won’t tell me.

I’m not sure whether I’m TAH or he is, but I’ve tried reasoning with him and he won’t go for it.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/anonymousone2three4 on 2024-01-18 07:04:19+00:00.

NOTE: the first burn they got they blamed me for NOT caring enough

I’m going to make this short because it’s ridiculous in my opinion and it’s a breaking point (for me).

My (F27) partner (M35) recently burned their arm on the air fryer. At the time I suggested rinsing in slightly cool water, a quick hit of burn antiseptic and some Neosporin and a bandaid.

The burn ended up being a little worse for ware than previously though and for the next two weeks I did not hear the end of it. How I didn’t take it seriously. How I didn’t care for their well being when they were seriously burned.

To be fair they can be a little dramatic when they feel they’ve been slighted against. I do feel bad I didn’t think more serious about it, but at this time I thought it was a typical burn and they were fighting me tooth and nail on what to do to treat it.

Cut to today. They have a small peas sized burn on their thumb from the air fryer, again. Immediately I jumped into partner mode, letting them know that I do care and it is serious to me.

I asked them if they were ok, they said yea, it was a blister and they were just stunned it happened again. Making jokes to avoid the air fryer.

I gently took the wounded area and asked to treat further. Telling them my treatment would guarantee to show healed by the next day, completely healed by day two to three. Given how upset they were the last time I thought I was showing them I genuinely cared.

They eagerly agreed and allowed me to treat the small burn. I treated it with my blend of antiseptic, rubbing alcohol, and hydrogen peroxide (no blend just what I was taught as a kid).

Then touched up with a drop of Neosporin and then a bandaid.

As soon as I put the band aid on they began berating me. Telling me how shitty I was for “taking control” without their consent to help them.

At that point I started to feel weird and began to record them asking them if I had asked to help and if they agreed, and after recognizing and consenting to being recorded they said they agreed to letting me help them, but not because they wanted me to.

After that they went on to berate me for even trying to help at all, but also saying yes it felt much better but how dare I help despite them agreeing. Newest argument is even though they agreed they really didn’t want my help.

AITH for helping my partner with a small burn after they made a big deal the first time I didn’t help?

If so, what exactly did I do wrong?

EDIT FOR CONTEXT: I forgot to mention, how did I know they were eager for my help on this burn vs. the last?

When I started offering help we have three versions of band aids (yes when it comes to boo boos me alone is essentially 5. I have designed bandaids… OKAY)

My partner made a HUGE deal the entire time I was helping them that I no longer had their favorite band aid, and how mad they were about it.

All leading to said argument… I literally thought they were joking. After I applied a different design they ripped it off and applied another bandaid of a totally different design entirely.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/TheCaptainRudy on 2024-01-18 07:02:29+00:00.

I share a single bathroom with my roommate. On some days I wake up at 5am to study.

According to him, he needs "minimum 45 minutes" of bathroom use in the morning. I can manage in 20 minutes. We both have 8am classes. So he says, I should be done with the bathroom by 7:15 am since I "already wake up early".

I told him that he can wake up early if he needs that long in the bathroom, and I'm not going to be ready 45 minutes before class, since I don't even need to use the bathroom that early. He says that I can't be the one to decide when he will wake up. Also, on many days, even if I am done by 7:15, he just continues to sleep through his "slot" and proceeds to not go to class anyway so the bathroom is just there, unoccupied. Even then he says, I must be done and the bathroom must be empty at 7:15 onwards regardless of whether he uses it or not as it is his "slot".

I have told him that I cannot shit that early but he says "idc but you must be done by 7:15". He says, I cannot be the one to decide when he wakes up, not how long he takes in the bathroom.

We tried having a discussion and he said that:

1. he pays the same as me
2. I "wake up early anyway" (but not everyday!) so I must be the one to use the bathroom first.

We decided to get a 3rd party opinion, so reddit AITA for not wanting to get ready in the morning 45 minutes before I need to everyday, just because I wake up to study at 5am on some days?

PS: unrelated to a similar post from a few days ago.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Pinktoadstool on 2024-01-18 07:00:47+00:00.

A little backstory I’ve been best friends with these two for over a decade now. We used to be roommates, so they are more like family than friends to me. The difference being the two are actually sisters. I’ve seen many fights from these two but this one probably takes the cake.

It all started earlier today when Marcia (f29) messaged today saying that she was canceling Jan’s (f32) bachelorette party in our group chat. She stated that Jan blocked her on everything and no longer wanted her apart of the wedding. Marcia had called the venue Jan wanted for her shower ugly. This devolved into a huge dispute. Now Marcia will be leaving the country for 2 weeks in a couple days and she is supposed to be throwing Jan’s bridal shower. The wedding is in 3 months so we are working on a tight timeline.

I called up both to hear both sides of the story. They both want Marcia to be apart of the wedding but neither is willing to concede that they were wrong at all. Both conversations ended in neither one wanting to say sorry and bringing up how both feel the other is negative and brings the other down. I told them to both take the night to cool off and I would check back in with them. I feel super out of my depths with this and don’t know how to help them resolve this.

AITA for trying to facilitate a resolution? My one friend said she didn’t want this to handled by a third party after everything was said and done. So now I feel like I shouldn’t have initiated anything to begin with.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/hukang23 on 2024-01-18 06:57:35+00:00.

My friends and I went on a road trip this past weekend. We all took turns driving the car. One of my friends hit a pole while he was driving (the road was icy) and has venmo charged us to split the cost of the car repair for the rental car. AITA for feeling like he should pay it since he ran into the pole? I feel like if I was driving and I caused an accident, that I should be responsible and I would pay for it. Nobody else in the group chat is saying anything, so maybe I'm the asshole (or maybe everyone else is waiting for someone else to be the asshole and say something).

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/ThrowRAronoccm on 2024-01-18 06:51:18+00:00.

I confessed to a friend Isabel (22F) I’d been close friends with for 3 years. It went very bad after I confessed cause although I was cool with being friends afterwards, she got upset at the fact I liked her and texted me saying she couldn’t take guys asking her out.

She was upset I got over her very quickly after I confessed and guilt tripped me, it got very bad to the point where she would spread dirty rumors about me at our work since we worked together telling people she didn’t want me “near” or “around” her. It really hurt for me to hear this because I literally moved on and started talking to people and idk why she maybe took offense to that she just couldn’t stand the fact that I liked her. I don’t work at that toxic environment anymore so I’m glad I moved on from that.

NOW, onto the main portion of why I wrote this question. I was close friends with this other friend named David (22M). Me, Isabel and David were very very close of a trio of friends since David introduced me to Isabel after high school.

During the the drama regarding Isabel not wanting to talk to me at work , I reached out to David for advice since he and I were really close. I told him I didn’t know what her issue was and I didn’t like how she was telling people at work these things, and I just asked him for advice because I told him I wanted to save the friendship because to me it’s childish stuff… she’s really mad that I liked her like… why?? It was a venting session where I was clearly frustrated.

I specifically told David not to mention any of this to Isabel in terms of what I tell him and what I ask for advice on…. And what do you know, David basically told her everything I told him. Telling her everything that I vented about. She was upset I told him she called me on the phone screaming at me basically telling me to step away from her life, hung up on me, unfollowed me, unliked all my stuff like a child lol.

It’s been about 3 months now since the incident, and since then David has still been trying to talk to me but I’m am very very dry and very cautious on what I tell him because I do not want him telling Isabel every aspect that goes on in my life at the moment.

It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even tell him where I work now because I’m afraid of him telling her.

I personally feel mean sort of ghosting him because he’s a good friend of mine… but he betrayed my trust. And this whole situation was just point blank dumb and so childish how everything escalated. All of this because of how I liked a girl??? That’s dumb.

AITA for not wanting to talk to him no longer and cut him off?

TL;DR I liked a friend named Isabel, I confessed to her, she didn’t feel the same. She got mad at me for confessing and started distancing herself from me at work spreading rumors about me to other co workers when we both agreed to move on. I asked a friend for advice, he told her everything I vented to him about. I no longer want to talk to him and want to cut him off, AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/sal101 on 2024-01-18 06:45:15+00:00.

Essentially, title. Long story short, my (37M) little sister (34F) asked me to walk her down the aisle as her dad (my ex-stepfather) is an asshole who wasn't in their lives for reasons i cant put here (not prison or anything, a long and complicated family situation that involved the courts). He's wrangled his way back into my sisters lives and suddenly out of nowhere she calls me and makes up some story that her fella has asked her dad to walk her down the aisle without remembering i was doing it.

I almost always know when my family are lying to me and it just came across that she'd decided to hide behind her other half. After making up with her father (how i'll never know) she decided to push me to the side. I'm not easily hurt but it pissed me off and hurt my feelings at the same time. Worst part is if she'd just asked i think i'd have stepped aside for her happiness but it just feels like it's been done slyly. But i dont know how much of that is just hurt or paranoia.

The last part is why i feel i'd be an asshole. Because, if i would have bowed out if it was done properly rather than just dropped on me, then am i just creating drama for no reason? My partner agrees with my initial reaction but we've been together for two decades so that's a given. Just want an unbiased opinion really. Would i be an asshole if i pulled out of going? I'm trying to be as unbiased as possible but personal feelings get in the way. And i have zero enthusiasm for it now. It's a big deal for me to go to big gatherings as it is (I'm autistic and struggle a lot with crowds of people) and i spent a lot of time building myself up for this. This kinda pulled a rug out from under me.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/ThrowRA9911hive on 2024-01-18 06:44:58+00:00.

My wife and I got married this December.

We've been together for 7 years and I really wanted to give her the dream wedding she wanted. Both me and my wife were heavily involved in the wedding and up until the reception, it was the best day of our lives.

My wife is very shy and non- confrontational. She wasn't hard on anyone about gifts, dresses, kids etc. We had a few simple rules like don't wear white and don't do anything to take the attention from the bride and groom.

Then, during the reception her sister walks in, dressed in this little white dress with her boyfriend (she was late and had missed the actual wedding completely). Their mom went up on the stage and on the mike requested everyone to pay attention to Bella (the sister) and there her bf got down on one knee and proposed.

As you can guess, suddenly, all the attention was on Bella. Their mother still screaming "my sweet daughter" on the mike.

No one had warned or even asked us before doing this. I was angry but my wife was just sitting in her seat trying not to cry. We hadn't even started the wedding speeches for us or cut the cake yet and now all her family could think about was Bella.

After about 20 minutes of her family just ignoring us and basically stopping the reception to drink and take pictures with the "new" bride to be, I was done. My wife just said she wanted to leave while trying to stop her tears.

I told my parents and our mutual friends to wrap up the party and took my wife and left. No one from her family stopped us. She cried the whole way to the hotel.

After about 2 hours, our phones started blowing up and I shut our phones to hopefully get some sleep. The day after, we left for our honeymoon and celebrated New Years in Kashmir.

We didn't talk to anyone except my parents.

We returned home last weekend and my wife's mother and sister came to visit. They were mad at us for leaving our wedding and embarrassing them. My wife just told them to leave and went up to her room, locking herself in.

When my MIL turned to me, I said she was a horrible mother for doing this to her daughter and she can forget about contacting us for the foreseeable future. Bella called me an asshole for ruining the party for everyone and I called her an attention seeking bitch in return.

Now some of our friends and relatives are saying they understand we were hurt but that it was wrong to leave the party altogether. So, AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/junkfoodjoint on 2024-01-18 06:40:11+00:00.

I don't know how big this post is going to be, but I'll keep it short. In June 2023, Me(21M) and D(21F) were in a relationship. It was going pretty well, and we were like most 21-year-old, sappy idiots in love. Back when we were together, I'd written some of my poetry in a small notebook and given it to her, as soon after that our relationship would become a long-distance relationship, with her moving to New York and me being in Vancouver.

It was supposed to be this kind of memento that she took along with herself to New York, something to remember me by while we were in different countries. And on the rare occasions that we would meet (during vacations or other occasions), I would update the book with new poetry I'd written while she was away, and she would update it with art she'd made. (She's an artist.)

Long story short, it never got to that point. She would break up with me out of the blue in July 2023, saying that she just didn't feel the same way about me anymore. I couldn't save it even though I tried. I was visibly upset about this, as this came out of nowhere. It was surprising to me because I had received an "I love you" upfront about a week before the breakup, and she'd even made art of me about 2 weeks before she said she wanted to breakup with me.

I don't want to speculate on what went wrong within the 2 weeks between her finding our relationship worthwhile enough to make custom art of me and wanting to breakup- as pontification about whether it was mental illness or I got cheated on is pretty pointless in my opinion. Regardless, when we broke up, I got very upset and asked for the aforementioned book back.

I said I'd give her art that she'd made of me back to her too. I thought it was pretty pointless to have this memento with the both of us, since it wouldn't have the opportunity to be updated anymore after the breakup. The art also had a short note at the back of it she'd written about "how we'd last forever" which was bothering me a lot.

I thought I would probably get rid of our memories eventually one way or another, and I thought I was more comfortable getting rid of my own art( my written poetry) rather than something she'd spent hours making, so I asked to trade stuff we'd made for each other.

Am I the Asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/schwammyeatsrice on 2024-01-18 06:35:44+00:00.

I’m 23 (F), sister is 26.

TLDR; Went to the supermarket yesterday. Left the house without telling anyone but few minutes later my sister call informing me that dad wanted a fruit. Then another few minutes later when I’ve already arrived at the supermarket she called again and wanted to say that mom wanted a drink. The connection at the supermarket is usually bad and I’d have to leave to be able to have a proper uninterrupted phone call. Somehow I got annoyed and answered my sis with an irritated “Hello?!” but I never shouted or anything. Then she said “Why are you angry at me?! Mom wants iced tea” before ending the call abruptly just as I was asking where from. So I texted her and she told me to ask mom myself and to not talk to her. So I replied explaining why I answered the way I did and she hasn’t talked to me until now. Not even this morning when I asked her if she was going to shower first because our alarms were ringing at the same time.

This isn’t the first time she’s done something like this. Basically she thinks if I seem annoyed in the way I answer it means I’m annoyed or mad at her but wtf sometimes she accuses me of this when I’m going through something personally on my own. In general, she’s “the sensitive (and loud) one” whereas I’m “the quiet one” in the family. She’d always say that she’s the emotional one but so am. Only difference is that she’ll always tell our other family members, even relatives when they come over (probably an attempt to embarrass me, idk) and then I’d be dealing with it on my own. I’m always swallowing my feelings because I’m the youngest one and have always been left out (we have an older brother that she’s close to ever since I could remember).

Also, I am about 70% confident she’ll do something passive aggressive like she’s done before, in the next few days if she continues not talking to me. (Example: One time she vacuumed under our bed but only her half lol. Or another time she messed up my side of the table or some other petty shit). Also ever since I was little, there was a hierarchy established by my parents because “she’s your older sister you must be nice”. So if I’m mad at something I can’t show it?

Kind of have more to say about our relationship but unrelated to yesterday’s story.

AITA, or am I right to say that she’s overly sensitive? This shit is such a small issue I’m so sick of it.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/RepresentativeCup428 on 2024-01-18 06:31:58+00:00.

This story happened a few months ago and it’s still sometimes happens but not as much, i (13m) have a little play brother(11m) from my dad‘s girlfriend, me and him get along pretty well except for certain times when he comes in my room and just starts bothering me, you know typical little brother stuff but sometimes it gets so bad to the point we have whole arguments and sometimes fight because he doesn’t listen, and when I ask him to clean my room when he messes it uphe uses it and gets mad at me when I tell him to clean it. and I tell my parents to talk to him and they stay giving him a slap on the wrist. For example, one time I was in my room playing the game with one of my friends he just barges in without knocking and says hey what are you doing? I tell him first off don’t barge into my room second off I’m playing game with my friend. Why would you need? He says nothing and proceeds to jump on my bed after I tell him countless times to stop, my brother tells me that I’m not the boss of him and I can’t tell him what to do and when I tell him to get out of my room, he listens, but he steps out for two seconds and walks back in and then he says never said for how long I had to stay out so then I start to forcefully push him out of my room, and then he throws a fit and says I just want to hang out with my brother trying to guilt trip me into letting him stay in my room and usually I fall for it letting him come back in my room not even five minutes later so then he can do the same thing over and over again. I’m so sick and tired of it and at this point I’m just going to ban him from my room but I don’t wanna do that because sometimes I do want him to come in there and play video games that I can get on my game, but he can’t get on his.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/WeirdTeenissues on 2024-01-18 06:30:19+00:00.

I (17M) have a younger sister (15F) and a younger brother (11M), our dad and mom divorced 10 something years ago after he found out she was cheating on him with our stepdad. Honestly, Me and my siblings have been assholes to our dad cause we love spending time with our Mom and stepdad. (our dad got sole custody of us but let our mom see us whenever she wanted) it's not like our dad wasn't a inactive Parent or anything. Infact he was more active in our lives than when our mom was SAHM for a short amount of time. our bio dad is chill and fun to be around and lowkey easy to talk too but yea he has his rules as a parent would. Our stepdad is fun as well but he's WAY more strict but only on certain things. Lately me and my siblings have refused to spend any time with our dad everytime he would ask but would jump at the chance our stepdad would bring us to something that was only a little fun. Today our dad Had a Talk about us possibly resenting him and liking the stepdad more and I honestly was realizing that we were pushing away our dad from our lives. I apologized a lot in the Conversation and my younger bro stayed quiet, but my sister said some cruel things I'd rather not say. But after we got to our mom and stepdad place I called her a jerk and she should've been respectful. I'm not gonna act like I didn't have part in neglecting dad cause that would be a damn lie but it no way near Her Degree. I told my mom and stepdad and they said I was a asshole for berading my sister cause she said the truth?? What?? My younger brother won't even speak to me but he's speaking with my sister and parents. Am I the AH?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Phrogyjuice on 2024-01-18 06:19:21+00:00.

I’ve never made a Reddit post so yippie I guess? I dunno. Also, I’m not talking about an specific time here, just in general.

To the point, I (F17) eat dinner with my family every night. We always have some sort of tv show or music going on in the background, but I can also still hear their chewing sounds pretty often. I hate these sounds (loud crunching, spit/food moving inside the mouth, loud swallowing, etc) but for the most part I can focus on whatever the background noise is over their sounds. Some nights they feel louder than usual, and have a hard time keeping my irritation tells (eye twitching etc) in check.

I used to say something (request they try their best to be a little quieter or be allowed to get up since I was done anyways), but I’ve stopped recently because my mom keeps telling me that I only developed this issue after finding out Matpat’s wife had the same issue in a film theory video (specifically one of the ones about the grinch) when I was younger (maybe around 8? I don’t know off the top of my head).

To be honest, I can’t remember if I had this issue or not, but with how often she insists it never used to be a problem I can only assume I started faking it and it became a real thing? I don’t know honestly.

Anyways, I’ve tried wearing earbuds but my mom or one of my sisters calls me out on it and I get the stink eye, and the sometimes one of my sisters will realize how loud they are and apologize and my mom gives me the stink eye again because it “never used to be an issue” and it makes me feel bad even if I’m not bothered by these sounds on purpos. I have no idea if I should stand up for myself or something.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/myempireofd1rt on 2024-01-18 06:19:04+00:00.

TL;DR AITA if I cut my childhood friend out of my life for abandoning her children and losing herself completely in her addiction after what she went through in life?

For context, I was a homeless teen and she was my closest friend. I spent a lot of time couch surfing with her stepfather who was a heavy drug user. He introduced her to her DOC (meth) and introduced to mine (heroin) He would get us high to get us to do things with him together. She was trapped with him for many years. She was clearly set up for failure in so many ways.

However my friend has did some absolutely horrific things in the last 5 years and has completely deteriorated. She has 3 children. She left them with their dad 5 years ago and now she has officially abandoned them. They haven't seen her in almost 4 years. She called them in November 2023 and promised she was coming to see them that weekend. I have a beautiful relationship godmother/aunt type with the girls. the youngest child absolutely broke down over this. She texted me 10+ times that day excited about meeting her mommy (she left before she could remember her) and literally cried herself to sleep. Her oldest is in therapy and struggling with her anger. I've BEGGED my friend to see them or at least call them.. it's always an excuse. I have been struggling with even speaking to her since this happened.

Breaking point for me: She was posting manically on FB a week ago about this guy she JUST MET! She posted a pic of his name tatted on her FACE then she dropped a bomb that they are tracking her ovulation cycle to make a CHILD TOGETHER!

I fcking lost it and so did her family. I basically said "B, you are in active addiction to meth and have been for years. You abandoned 3 babies. Neither of you have a place to stay or even a job wtf is wrong with you" she blew up and said she would kick the addiction when she got pregnant because she'd be too sick to do it anymore then she'd get a job, get clean, be a good mother to this baby. She went on to say that I was being a judgemental btch and accused me of forgetting everything she had been through in life, I was cruel to shit on her only chance at happiness, and that she deserved a chance to start over with a new family.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/The_Whale_Cat on 2024-01-18 06:12:34+00:00.

I (19F) walked down stairs to get some food and see my roommate (19F) watching the new Percy Jackson show that apparently existed? I’m not that updated with media so seeing that Percy Jackson had a show adaptation was surprising after the terrible movie adaptations... no offense to those who loved them… anyways, I stood there watching for a while and saw that Annabeth in the show is a black actress and commented and I quote “oh she’s black” and continued to watch because the show looked pretty good. On the other hand, my roommate blew up saying things like “you got a problem with that???!!!” I was taken aback because I never thought anything other than making an observation that they casted someone of different physical appearance from what they did in the past. I then voiced out my thoughts and she continues by saying that the actress is the best portrayal of the character as if I was indicating otherwise? I started to get frustrated and just said “white people” and she got extremely defensive and said “yeah because we are always the bad guys!” For context I am a BIPOC person who is not black. I just felt so uncomfortable in that situation that I couldn’t even eat what I went downstairs to make. A part of me wants to apologize but I am also not comfortable with how sensitive she is and with a history of how she’s micro-aggressed my background with talking in “funny” inaccurate accents I just don’t feel right about it.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/SellApprehensive9070 on 2024-01-18 06:07:58+00:00.

My SO wants “us” to go on a diet. While I am all about healthy living and eating etc…I don’t think it’s fair that I should have to change my diet to accommodate him. I know that being on a diet is tough without everyone on the same page just for sake of groceries, but after lengthy discussions we have different opinions about what is “healthy” and “unhealthy” and haven’t reached an agreement. Ultimately he said I should just go along with his idea and do what he wants regardless of my feelings on the issue because I should be supporting him. But what about my support?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/got_problems_ on 2024-01-18 02:14:06+00:00.

Asking my parents not to watch explicit shows in the living room.

I (23) live with my parents and brother (15). My parents come home after work and watch their shows in the living room. I usually stay in my bedroom while they do this but occasionally I need to pass by the living room to get to the kitchen for food/drink and use the bathroom. And half of the time when I walk by the tv is showing sex scenes.

They have a television in their bedroom so I want to ask if they would mind watching that type of stuff in their room.

Context: I have experienced past trauma that makes me feel uncomfortable seeing and hearing these scenes on tv. At this time, moving out is not an option.

I could ask them to pause the show until I’m done in the kitchen but I don’t want to be annoying.

Am I being unreasonable in this request?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Effective-Finance-31 on 2024-01-18 02:04:29+00:00.

Using a throwaway account. For context, im a manager, so when I make a schedule, it's meant to be that way.

On Saturday, an assistant manager that I had scheduled asked if he could call in his friend and go home because he "wanted to go see his wife." I told him no, his friend isn't needed today and that if he wanted the day off, he should have requested off. He wasn't sick or anything like that, he just didn't want to be at work.

Lo and behold, 40 some minutes later, his friend shows up and he says hes going home. I tell him, no you aren't, i had you scheduled today for a reason and that the other employee needs to go home. He clocks out and leaves anyways. At around 8 pm, we get our dinner rush and it's terrible. This employee that he called in can't be left alone for longer than 5-10 minutes without messing stuff up, and I'm trying to help him and do my own tasks at the same time. Literally, im not exaggerating there's no place that he could both be useful and left alone. He's still in training, so there's a reason I only have him scheduled on days where he has essentially a glorified babysitter. So when the rush is finally over, i call the Assistant Manager from before up, and tell him that i'm writing him up for insubordination. He tells me that his friend needed more hours, and that I can shove it and he quit. He said that he was going to HR to complain about me and that he quits effective immediately. Then, his friend quit because he was only here because his friend was here. So reddit, i have to ask, AITA for writing up an insubordinate employee and telling him that he can't change my schedule however he feels?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/ImmediateStructure78 on 2024-01-18 01:58:52+00:00.

I got married last year. I had 5 bridesmaids. One of them was my cousin. My cousin is 5 years older than me. She’s almost been like a mother to me and a sister all in one. We are really good friends and talk all the time. My own mother didn’t attend my wedding but my cousin did.

The weekend of my wedding we all had so much fun. My cousin got along really well with another one of my bridesmaids that I’ve known for probably 6 years but she lives several states away so I only see her in person like twice a year. Hwoever we talk on a weekly basis.

The issue is that as much as I love my cousin-she just has a different ideal lifestyle than my other friend and I. My other friend and I are huge travel buddies. We met studying abroad together and talk about traveling again a lot together. My cousin has no desire to travel other than to maybe the next state over and then would rather camp in a tent or go to a tractor festival than to go snorkeling and cliff diving like we like to. Please let me emphasize I SEE NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS. it’s just a difference in person and finances.

However last year my friend “Amy” and I wanted to go to New Orleans together. My cousin has been wanting to hang out the three of us ever since the wedding and I didn’t want her to feel left out so I invited her. First my cousin said that might be too far for her. So we started suggesting other places. Then my cousin straight up told us “we can’t go anywhere that requires a plane because I can’t afford it.” We were like oh ok. That’s fine. So where would you like to go? She suggested a tractor show about an hour away from us. Amy ended up saying she couldn’t get off work-privately telling me she likes my cousin and wants us all to hang out but doesn’t know if she wants to use her vacation days to do that. I can’t say I blame her but I don’t mean to be mean.

6 months later Amy and I have started planning a trip to florida just her and I. Suddenly it’s like my cousin has a 6th sense and asks us when we can all drive 10 hours to Amy’s house. I told her I wasn’t sure but I’m sure we can talk to Amy and do something this year. She has no idea any and I are already going to florida. My cousin is there for me when no one else has been. So I feel bad to leave her out but I know she will find out eventually-but I’m worried if I tell her it will end up like last time.