Relationships

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2101
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/zxcvbnm__1234567890 on 2023-12-29 10:09:12+00:00.


I'm not eager to have kids myself, but I always imagined I would have a family when the time was right, and she had always said the same. If I choose her, I would carry on with no bitterness whatsoever or resentment. If I choose to leave her, obviously I will lose my best friend, but there may be a chance for me to have a family in the future.

How do I choose between a life with my future wife and no kids, and my potential future family?

I am saddened by all this, but not bitter. I don't blame her for how she is feeling. People change.

I don't know if it's more probable that she changes her mind again about kids, than it is I find someone to start a family with. I don't know if that should factor in. I need help thinking about this.

Tl:dr Wife changed her mind about kids, I need to choose between my future family and my wife.

2102
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Fearless_Grape_3371 on 2023-12-29 10:25:52+00:00.


TDLR: My mother makes comments that makes it difficult for me to live a guilt free life.

I feel like I cannot give enough context for this post without it being extremely long, so I’ll do my best. I (24F) live with my mother (62F) and my stepfather (62M). I have lived out of home for approximately a year when I was 22, and have recently (in the last year) have gotten into my first relationship with someone (32M) I work with that lives near us. Since getting into this relationship, I constantly am made to feel guilty about the amount of time I spend with my partner. My mother consistently makes comments like ‘you are apart of their family more than ours’, ‘you like them more than us’, ‘can you not spend any time apart’ etc. any time I am with him (even though we spend a balanced time at both places). Ever since I was little I have felt a strong sense to not disappoint my mother and guilt when she is upset or angry (coming from divorce and rather crap situations). I feel like my mother has also developed severe anxiety. Just this past weeks, over Christmas, my mother has lost the plot and become really nasty over us not seeing eye to eye with my oldest brother even though she is the one to say the most negative things about him. Reddit, how do I stop feeling so guilty and responsible for her feelings and anxiety? How do I stop feeling like everything I do impacts her emotions? It’s starting to impact my relationship as I’m always teary, stressed and second guessing my decisions. I also have crippling anxiety/sadness about moving out and leaving her.

2103
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/_somazingg on 2023-12-29 10:23:54+00:00.


So I (27f) recently ended things with this guy (27m) I was seeing. We were talking, going on dates and hooking up, but it wasn't anything serious, and we both knew that.

This went on for 3 months, and afterwards, he said he wanted to make it exclusive as he hadn't been with anyone else during this time and wanted to see where this would go. I agreed. I think we were official for 2 weeks; it was going well. I was talking to a friend, and he was sitting with me. My friend's baby just turned 1, and she jokingly said it was smart of me not to want kids.

He interrupted me right there and said "you don't want kids?" I was honestly surprised and told him we'd discuss it when we're alone. When we finally talked about this, his first words were, "I can't believe you'd waste my time like that." I don't know where this was all coming from. In all the three months I've known him, I know he wasn't a guy who ever wanted commitment so much in the past. He told me so himself. And I've never been into relationships much myself, so based on that, I thought this was going well. Plus, when was I supposed to bring this up?

We were fooling around for months and only just started dating. I think it'd be really pushy. I brought it up so early, and I told him this. Well, he claimed I was "manipulating him into dating me." And I should've told him beforehand. I don't get it. In those three months,we had a great time, but he's often asked me if I'm aware this thing between us was just casual (he's had issues with it in the past when a fwb assumed they were dating). Based on his behavior, why would I bring up the whole kids topic??

Well, he waswas mad, refused to listen, and left. I thought we were over. Well, he calls me two days later, asking if I've changed my mind??! Then she began to spew out words like, As a woman, you'll eventually want kids,everyone has them, you're being foolish and selfish. This made me so angry. I told him we're done, and I've blocked him now, but I'm actually thinking, When should I bring this up in my next relationships? The way I see it, 2 weeks is just so soon. It should be at least 4-5 months.

Tldr: The guy I was seeing thinks I was selfish for not letting him know I don't want kids

2104
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Specialist-Tap9880 on 2023-12-29 10:22:29+00:00.


TLDR: I'm not sure if I (22 M) truly love my girlfriend (22 F) - I don't know if I should break it up.

We have been together for 8 months now. We fell in love with each other really quick and both said we loved each other after 1 month of dating. She is really amazing and most people would give anything for someone like this as well as a relationship like ours. We don't have any of the same interests really but yet we get on so well. There isn't really anything big that is a complete dealbreaker about her.

However, recently I've started to question if I actually love her or do I just love the idea of being in a relationship?

Sometimes I do feel really loved up with her and I do want to see her but then other times, I catch myself not being that bothered and would prefer to be alone instead. Sometimes I sit and wonder and think if I could be with her my whole life and I don't know if I can picture it. I have read that sometimes it takes love to develop but is this true? Has our "honeymoon" period just ended?

This is a bad trait of mine and I might get roasted in the replies for it but I can't help myself to compare this relationship with my last. My ex was super toxic and it was going nowhere but I was really in love. I always found myself going back to her and we only ended it a couple months before this relationship.

It is just small stuff - like the fact my ex actually seemed interested in my daily life, my current gf doesn't ask me how work is going or how the gym was etc. The sex was better in my last relationship. I felt more physically attracted to my ex aswell. I think I just felt a bit more loved in my last relationship. Ive only just brought up stuff to my current partner about these things so i’ve given her some time to work on them.

It just feels as though there is something missing from our relationship and I can't tell what. I feel that if I am having all these thoughts then it must mean it isn't real?

I don't want to end up regretting a decision but also there is a feeling in me that this isn't the love of my life. How can I tell if someone is the love of my life?

2105
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Nico2435 on 2023-12-29 10:00:34+00:00.


Hi all, so right now we are faced with a logistical predicament! I'm British and have been with my Indian boyfriend for 2 years now. Possibly only Indians can understand this situation but basically he works in a Government job in India meaning he has studied for years to get his current position and has a very secure good job which is very competitive. He has not worked in any other field, so if he had to move to UK for example, he would need to start a brand new career from scratch, gaining skills experience etc. To note he is very open to this and has no problem beginning to move to IT sector, as he doesnt really enjoy his work much but it is stable and secure. However I do not want him to leave his current job UNLESS I am 100% sure I cannot live in India.

I spend 6 months of a year in India with him this year and I love it there. I am almost fluent in Hindi and I love Indian culture. When I come back to UK I feel sad and dont feel like it is as much my home. As of now, I do prefer life in India.

My fear is this could all change in the future especially after certain milestones - marriage, kids. I've seen before in my life where I thought I would be happy someway and it changes as I age and my priorities change. The other factor is my dad passed away this year, and my mam is now alone here. My sister does live closely but she has newborn twins so naturally is busy with them. My mam has also expressed she doesnt want me to go and live so far away and I am feeling guilty and selfish.

This has become a logistical nightmare on how to make the relationship work. I love him so much and really cant imagine being more compatible with anyone - therefore I need to find a way to resolve this but terrified of making a wrong decision.

Tl;Dr Indian BF doesnt have skills/job enabling him to work in my home country, I want to live in India for now but worried it could change in future and then how would be work in UK.

2106
 
 
This is an automated archive.

The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Nico2435 on 2023-12-29 10:00:34+00:00.


Hi all, so right now we are faced with a logistical predicament! I'm British and have been with my Indian boyfriend for 2 years now. Possibly only Indians can understand this situation but basically he works in a Government job in India meaning he has studied for years to get his current position and has a very secure good job which is very competitive. He has not worked in any other field, so if he had to move to UK for example, he would need to start a brand new career from scratch, gaining skills experience etc. To note he is very open to this and has no problem beginning to move to IT sector, as he doesnt really enjoy his work much but it is stable and secure. However I do not want him to leave his current job UNLESS I am 100% sure I cannot live in India.

I spend 6 months of a year in India with him this year and I love it there. I am almost fluent in Hindi and I love Indian culture. When I come back to UK I feel sad and dont feel like it is as much my home. As of now, I do prefer life in India.

My fear is this could all change in the future especially after certain milestones - marriage, kids. I've seen before in my life where I thought I would be happy someway and it changes as I age and my priorities change. The other factor is my dad passed away this year, and my mam is now alone here. My sister does live closely but she has newborn twins so naturally is busy with them. My mam has also expressed she doesnt want me to go and live so far away and I am feeling guilty and selfish.

This has become a logistical nightmare on how to make the relationship work. I love him so much and really cant imagine being more compatible with anyone - therefore I need to find a way to resolve this but terrified of making a wrong decision.

Tl;Dr Indian BF doesnt have skills/job enabling him to work in my home country, I want to live in India for now but worried it could change in future and then how would be work in UK.

2107
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/gracessacrifice on 2023-12-29 09:25:23+00:00.


My partner and I have been together for two years and this holiday season we’ve been visiting our respective families together. Honestly we’ve been talking a marriage and the whole she-bang, with intention for the next few years. Like moving, marrying, raising children. So it’s easy to say we’re pretty serious.

My boyfriend is great! A total sweetheart, communicative, super respectful, open-minded, the whole nine yards.

My dad is also great! He cares a lot from me and adopted me (as an adult) after he and my mom divorced. I’ve known him since I was 7, and I’m close with his wife and my siblings

However, this is the first time I have seen my boyfriend and my dad interact with each other…and it’s weird. They’re very similar, down to background, personalities, demeanor, interests. I have become hyper-aware of how alike they are.

They aren’t bad similarities as they are both wonderful and excellent people. And it has nothing to do with appearance- they look completely different. But now when my boyfriend talks, or does something I just see my dad. I can’t even think of doing anything more than hugging him without getting super skeeved out.

There’s a few reasons this concerns me:

I’m afraid I’m repeating the patterns of my mom and dad with this relationship

Sigmund Freud is laughing maniacally at me from his grave - which is enough to vomit

I will not get past the fact they’re so similar and I’ll have to end the relationship bc I feel like Om practically dating my father.

TLDR; Boyfriend and Father are so similar that I am uncomfortable and don’t know what to do. If anyone has advice, experience, or whatever, I’ll take it.

2108
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/RandomBunny95 on 2023-12-29 09:11:16+00:00.


So, I never used Reddit never on social media, I’m 28 female, busy with work. Family and working out almost everyday, never bothered to use sites like Reddit or any forum sites in general. I keep it simple and easy on social media.

I’ve been with my husband since I was 16 years of age he was 17 when we clicked together. Married 6 years ago.

I don’t really wanna talk about what my job is and where I’m from, people nowadays an easily find locations and pin point where I’m from.

But I’m here to ask for advice of how do I open the the marriage and talk to my husband about it. I’ve seen a lot of people having a very good experience and I want to experience something new. Last thing I want to hurt him or lose him, wanted to open my marriage for almost 6 months now but don’t know how to bring it up to him. Any advice?

And please don’t ask where I’m from and specific I’m very careful with what kind of information I lay on the internet. Thanks.

TL;DR How do I open my marriage and bring my husband to do it. How do I bring this subject up to him without hurting him or risk not losing him. I’m really want some relationship advice and how to bring this subject to him.

2109
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Dunadan2358 on 2023-12-29 08:46:26+00:00.


So 2 years ago I was climbing with a friend and he fell from 40 feet to rocks, ripping out all his protection that was supposed to catch him. I'll spare you the gorey details but it was probably the single most horrfying thing I've ever seen and I've never seen a human being in so much pain before. He is alive but no longer has use of his legs.

We were still hanging out while and after he recovered and have talked a bit about it but there's a lot that I have a hard time talking about. I have this sort of survivor's guilt because I still have full function of my body and I see how much it pains him to not engage with the outdoors like we used to. I brought this up but he took it as me feeling guilty that I didnt catch him, which is true, but then he told me how guilty he feels that I had to watch him nearly die and see such a gruesome thing, take care of him and initiate rescue. After he told me this I just couldnt tell him that i feel so guilty that I can still walk, it just felt wrong.

This year i had a stint of many months where I would have flashbacks every day of the event. It was usually alone ehen it happened but sometimes We would be hanging out and then all the sudden images and sounds of his face contorted in agony screaming at the sky for help would come into my mind, when he was jist sitting there normally right in front of me. It began to get really hard to see him because these flashbacks are really scary. I started to avoid him because its really hard for me to go back there.

I think he thinks we havent been hanging out because he cant do the things he used to but that's not the case, im just afraid. I want to tell him this is the reason but he already feels so guilty about it and has so much on his plate that I cant bring myself to add to his pain. Its really eating me up because he's one of my best friends and I dont want to abandon him, I'm just going through a lot in my head. How do I approach this conversation?

Tl;dr My friend was paralyzed waist down in a climbing accident and its hard for me to see him because i have PTSD from witnessing it. Want to know how to talk about it with him.

2110
 
 
This is an automated archive.

The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/SleepyJoe0530 on 2023-12-29 08:59:56+00:00.


Hi everyone,

I’m here seeking some perspective on my relationship. I’m a 23-year-old female, originally from China, and my boyfriend is a 27-year-old male from Mexico. We’ve been together for 10 months and have faced some challenges, especially around the concept of attention and personal space.

I’ve noticed a kind of role reversal in our relationship – I’m often the one being told I’m not romantic enough, forgetful of anniversaries, and not keen on celebrating certain moments. This isn’t because I don’t care, but rather, I have a more laid-back approach to relationships.

My boyfriend feels neglected when I’m busy with work or enjoying my personal time, like playing games. We don’t live together and there are no immediate plans for that, as we both feel it’s too early for such commitments. He’s expressed that he’s not ready for marriage or cohabitation, and I respect and understand this.

I really do care about him and try to show it, but I’m naturally a very chill person. I value trust and believe it’s healthy to have time apart. This might be influenced by my background – I moved to Canada 6 years ago and have always had a more independent relationship with my family.

Adding to this, I have ADHD, which I’ve heard can sometimes impact how one handles relationships and personal space. I’m at a bit of a loss. I want to be true to myself but also make him feel valued and not neglected. I don’t know if constantly changing myself is the answer or how I can communicate better to help him understand my need for personal space while still caring about him.

Has anyone else experienced something similar, especially in cross-cultural relationships? How did you navigate these differences? Any advice on balancing personal space with a partner’s need for attention would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you!

TL;DR: I’m a 23-year-old Chinese woman dating a 27-year-old Mexican man for 10 months. We struggle with balancing my need for personal space and his feelings of neglect. We’re not ready for cohabitation or marriage. I have ADHD, which may impact the situation. Seeking advice on managing these relationship dynamics in a cross-cultural setting.

2111
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/That_girlriri on 2023-12-29 08:58:31+00:00.


I have been a planning a trip with 3 of my friends for an entire year to visit GOA for NYE, I’m from UAE.

Recently, during Christmas my dad got sick and got diagnosed with cellulitis, so he’s hospitalized now. Due to which, I’m reconsidering my trip. He’s 58, and my mum is pretty fit and she drives so I know she can manage, but I also want to be there for her wherever I can support. I also have my first relatives around but I would not burden them to look out for my dad.

Dads speaking pretty well, and is very conscious but the issue where I’m scared is about if the cellulitis could worsen for him? As he’s also diabetic. Like it could spread to the lymph nodes and all. In general, I’m scared and worried. Mainly overthinking a lot.

If I don’t go I’d be spoiling new years for my other friends too, but if I do go then I would be guilty of what kind of daughter I am? If anything happened when I’m not here I would be filled with regret. On the other hand, my boyfriend and brother said if I was on your place, I would prioritize and I know that’s right as I should. But what if this is not such a serious issue and I’m just overthinking? My parents are pushing me to go, but that’s my parents they would not want me to stress out and spoil the trip for my friends as well.

I don’t know what I should do anymore, as anyone ever been in the same place as me? What did y’all do?

TL;Dr - Reconsidering my planned trip as dad is hospitalized

2112
 
 
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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Responsible-Fig-6857 on 2023-12-29 08:57:08+00:00.


W(53) me (53) tomorrow happy bday to me.

We have been married for 11 years now. She has 5 kids and I have 2. Basically, we raises them together and they are all ours. A few of her kids have our grandbabies which I dearly love. We have had some serious issues over several years which led me to having a nervous break down. Mostly centered around my mom and step-dad and son. My parents used to live across the road. Well during that time I got the feeling she was cheating on me but really don't think it started then just my anxiety. Well I got over my anxiety without the help of a doctor or meds bit it took me several years. For the last two years I have been clean (is this best way to describe it) from anxiety. I knew we was still having issues this last summer and we talked about where we was and what she wanted to do. She said she wanted to work it out and stay together. She said she loved me but wasn't in love with me. So I seriously thought we was on the mend. Two days ago I was able to look at her phone, she seriously protected it for years, which did set my spider senses off. I'm not debating the ethical of me looking because I did it. Now i know and have proof. She has been sexting her ex fwb for last year. I really thought our life was moving in the right direction for our anniversary trip she gave me metallica concert tickets. We went to that and had a great time. However in the last set of text in December she told him things I can't type her because I am so broken right now. My birthday is tomorrow we are supposed to have Christmas party at her parents tomorrow all the family is supposed to be there. I don't want a divorce but how do I stay and ever trust her again. One of her kids wife is pregnant with twins and they are supposed to name it after me. It's not like I'm loosing her but all of her kids and grandbabies. I'm so broken hearted

How do you look at your spouse after they betray you. The crazy thing is this guy live around the corner from us and she has supposedly hanging out with his mother, who is a widower, but she knows about the prior relationship and all her kids know about this guy. So she has been going over there for years.

Is there any chance I recover our marriage she is all kinds of sweet on me know. I don't even understand because I've been asking for this women and now that I know that day I found out let her back out.

She told me if I wanted her to leave she will pack her stuff and go two of her kids lives with us.

I'm just broken and don't know what to do. My mom is of course screaming at me to leave my wife. But she did that with me over my ex.

I know reddit typically says divorce over stuff like this but I want to know has anyone ever been able to truly let it go and recover. I have forgiven her but I'm still very hurt.

TL;DR she has been sexting her fwb she was with before we met over the last year but her also lives around corner from us ans she never told me but she goes and visist his mother.

2113
 
 
This is an automated archive.

The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Big_Spirit5896 on 2023-12-29 08:54:33+00:00.


I’m not exactly sure how to word this or how to explain it, but to start I am 18M and I have a girlfriend who is 21F. We’ve been dating for nearly 4 months, and it’s been great. She is basically moved into my house now, we met at work and work at the same place, and life has been amazing since being with this girl. I even just got her a promise ring, and life looks really exciting with her. We do everything together, and we’ve met each others family and all that. Sure you can call it honeymoon phase or whatever but it’s been really nice, I really do love her and she has done everything to show me that I can trust her and she does everything that shows that she loves me too. But it’s like my brain cannot process that, like she is feeling the emotions I get for her? Is she just acting this way? Does she really look at me and just smile like I do at her? I mean I see that she does, physically, but in my mind there is just no way there is any emotion and or love for me in her head. This is my first relationship, I’ve never been close with someone before. We have sex very often but a lot of the time while we do I just have a hard time believing that I’m actually pleasing her; or making her feel anything. I just go along though and try to be confident, I mean she acts like she enjoys it but I don’t know. I guess it sounds dumb cause why would she be with me all the time and do all these things with me if she didn’t actually love me? But my brain always makes some excuse, like she’s just using me to get over her ex, or that she’s just bored, and it’s constantly making me overthink and over analyze everything. It’s not like she’s doing anything wrong, but I really do sometimes think everything is fake. I don’t know why, cause I’ll be all happy and just in love but then I get this gut wrenching feeling it’s not real. No way anybody could actually love me, and feel feelings for me. I look at myself in the mirror and I often breakdown into tears and just wish I was living a different life, looking at a different me, I don’t like what I see and can’t imagine anybody else liking it either. I try not to let this ruin our moments, and make her unhappy or anything I just step away for a few minutes and try to calm down and just act confident and believe she’s really into me. But sometimes it’s like I just see her as some robot and I kind of lose my cool, I always step away for a while and let the emotions flow through me until I am done. Is something wrong with me? I just want to be happy, to believe something that seems so impossible to me. I just assume everything is a lie. It would feel so good just to know that somebody, without a doubt, loves you, and finds beauty in you. If you read all of this I appreciate it, this is kind of a vent but I also need genuine advice about this cause I don’t want this to ruin what we have. Thank you.

TLDR: I have a hard time imagining that my girlfriend loves me despite her doing nothing to show otherwise, cannot imagine that she has real love and attraction to me, need advice

2114
 
 
This is an automated archive.

The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Responsible-Fig-6857 on 2023-12-29 08:47:27+00:00.


We have been married for 11 years now. She has 5 kids and I have 2. Basically, we raises them together and they are all ours. A few of her kids have our grandbabies which I dearly love. We have had some serious issues over several years which led me to having a nervous break down. Mostly centered around my mom and step-dad and son. My parents used to live across the road. Well during that time I got the feeling she was cheating on me but really don't think it started then just my anxiety. Well I got over my anxiety without the help of a doctor or meds bit it took me several years. For the last two years I have been clean (is this best way to describe it) from anxiety. I knew we was still having issues this last summer and we talked about where we was and what she wanted to do. She said she wanted to work it out and stay together. She said she loved me but wasn't in love with me. So I seriously thought we was on the mend. Two days ago I was able to look at her phone, she seriously protected it for years, which did set my spider senses off. I'm not debating the ethical of me looking because I did it. Now i know and have proof. She has been sexting her ex fwb for last year. I really thought our life was moving in the right direction for our anniversary trip she gave me metallica concert tickets. We went to that and had a great time. However in the last set of text in December she told him things I can't type her because I am so broken right now. My birthday is tomorrow we are supposed to have Christmas party at her parents tomorrow all the family is supposed to be there. I don't want a divorce but how do I stay and ever trust her again. One of her kids wife is pregnant with twins and they are supposed to name it after me. It's not like I'm loosing her but all of her kids and grandbabies. I'm so broken hearted

How do you look at your spouse after they betray you. The crazy thing is this guy live around the corner from us and she has supposedly hanging out with his mother, who is a widower, but she knows about the prior relationship and all her kids know about this guy. So she has been going over there for years.

Is there any chance I recover our marriage she is all kinds of sweet on me know. I don't even understand because I've been asking for this women and now that I know that day I found out let her back out.

She told me if I wanted her to leave she will pack her stuff and go two of her kids lives with us.

I'm just broken and don't know what to do. My mom is of course screaming at me to leave my wife. But she did that with me over my ex.

I know reddit typically says divorce over stuff like this but I want to know has anyone ever been able to truly let it go and recover. I have forgiven her but I'm still very hurt.

TL;DR: : she has atm sexting her fwb she was with before we met over the last year but her also lives around corner from us ans she never told me but she goes and visist his mother.

2115
 
 
This is an automated archive.

The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/SleepyJoe0530 on 2023-12-29 08:59:56+00:00.


Hi everyone,

I’m here seeking some perspective on my relationship. I’m a 23-year-old female, originally from China, and my boyfriend is a 27-year-old male from Mexico. We’ve been together for 10 months and have faced some challenges, especially around the concept of attention and personal space.

I’ve noticed a kind of role reversal in our relationship – I’m often the one being told I’m not romantic enough, forgetful of anniversaries, and not keen on celebrating certain moments. This isn’t because I don’t care, but rather, I have a more laid-back approach to relationships.

My boyfriend feels neglected when I’m busy with work or enjoying my personal time, like playing games. We don’t live together and there are no immediate plans for that, as we both feel it’s too early for such commitments. He’s expressed that he’s not ready for marriage or cohabitation, and I respect and understand this.

I really do care about him and try to show it, but I’m naturally a very chill person. I value trust and believe it’s healthy to have time apart. This might be influenced by my background – I moved to Canada 6 years ago and have always had a more independent relationship with my family.

Adding to this, I have ADHD, which I’ve heard can sometimes impact how one handles relationships and personal space. I’m at a bit of a loss. I want to be true to myself but also make him feel valued and not neglected. I don’t know if constantly changing myself is the answer or how I can communicate better to help him understand my need for personal space while still caring about him.

Has anyone else experienced something similar, especially in cross-cultural relationships? How did you navigate these differences? Any advice on balancing personal space with a partner’s need for attention would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you!

TL;DR: I’m a 23-year-old Chinese woman dating a 27-year-old Mexican man for 10 months. We struggle with balancing my need for personal space and his feelings of neglect. We’re not ready for cohabitation or marriage. I have ADHD, which may impact the situation. Seeking advice on managing these relationship dynamics in a cross-cultural setting.

2116
 
 
This is an automated archive.

The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/That_girlriri on 2023-12-29 08:58:31+00:00.


I have been a planning a trip with 3 of my friends for an entire year to visit GOA for NYE, I’m from UAE.

Recently, during Christmas my dad got sick and got diagnosed with cellulitis, so he’s hospitalized now. Due to which, I’m reconsidering my trip. He’s 58, and my mum is pretty fit and she drives so I know she can manage, but I also want to be there for her wherever I can support. I also have my first relatives around but I would not burden them to look out for my dad.

Dads speaking pretty well, and is very conscious but the issue where I’m scared is about if the cellulitis could worsen for him? As he’s also diabetic. Like it could spread to the lymph nodes and all. In general, I’m scared and worried. Mainly overthinking a lot.

If I don’t go I’d be spoiling new years for my other friends too, but if I do go then I would be guilty of what kind of daughter I am? If anything happened when I’m not here I would be filled with regret. On the other hand, my boyfriend and brother said if I was on your place, I would prioritize and I know that’s right as I should. But what if this is not such a serious issue and I’m just overthinking? My parents are pushing me to go, but that’s my parents they would not want me to stress out and spoil the trip for my friends as well.

I don’t know what I should do anymore, as anyone ever been in the same place as me? What did y’all do?

TL;Dr - Reconsidering my planned trip as dad is hospitalized

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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Responsible-Fig-6857 on 2023-12-29 08:57:08+00:00.


W(53) me (53) tomorrow happy bday to me.

We have been married for 11 years now. She has 5 kids and I have 2. Basically, we raises them together and they are all ours. A few of her kids have our grandbabies which I dearly love. We have had some serious issues over several years which led me to having a nervous break down. Mostly centered around my mom and step-dad and son. My parents used to live across the road. Well during that time I got the feeling she was cheating on me but really don't think it started then just my anxiety. Well I got over my anxiety without the help of a doctor or meds bit it took me several years. For the last two years I have been clean (is this best way to describe it) from anxiety. I knew we was still having issues this last summer and we talked about where we was and what she wanted to do. She said she wanted to work it out and stay together. She said she loved me but wasn't in love with me. So I seriously thought we was on the mend. Two days ago I was able to look at her phone, she seriously protected it for years, which did set my spider senses off. I'm not debating the ethical of me looking because I did it. Now i know and have proof. She has been sexting her ex fwb for last year. I really thought our life was moving in the right direction for our anniversary trip she gave me metallica concert tickets. We went to that and had a great time. However in the last set of text in December she told him things I can't type her because I am so broken right now. My birthday is tomorrow we are supposed to have Christmas party at her parents tomorrow all the family is supposed to be there. I don't want a divorce but how do I stay and ever trust her again. One of her kids wife is pregnant with twins and they are supposed to name it after me. It's not like I'm loosing her but all of her kids and grandbabies. I'm so broken hearted

How do you look at your spouse after they betray you. The crazy thing is this guy live around the corner from us and she has supposedly hanging out with his mother, who is a widower, but she knows about the prior relationship and all her kids know about this guy. So she has been going over there for years.

Is there any chance I recover our marriage she is all kinds of sweet on me know. I don't even understand because I've been asking for this women and now that I know that day I found out let her back out.

She told me if I wanted her to leave she will pack her stuff and go two of her kids lives with us.

I'm just broken and don't know what to do. My mom is of course screaming at me to leave my wife. But she did that with me over my ex.

I know reddit typically says divorce over stuff like this but I want to know has anyone ever been able to truly let it go and recover. I have forgiven her but I'm still very hurt.

TL;DR she has been sexting her fwb she was with before we met over the last year but her also lives around corner from us ans she never told me but she goes and visist his mother.

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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Big_Spirit5896 on 2023-12-29 08:54:33+00:00.


I’m not exactly sure how to word this or how to explain it, but to start I am 18M and I have a girlfriend who is 21F. We’ve been dating for nearly 4 months, and it’s been great. She is basically moved into my house now, we met at work and work at the same place, and life has been amazing since being with this girl. I even just got her a promise ring, and life looks really exciting with her. We do everything together, and we’ve met each others family and all that. Sure you can call it honeymoon phase or whatever but it’s been really nice, I really do love her and she has done everything to show me that I can trust her and she does everything that shows that she loves me too. But it’s like my brain cannot process that, like she is feeling the emotions I get for her? Is she just acting this way? Does she really look at me and just smile like I do at her? I mean I see that she does, physically, but in my mind there is just no way there is any emotion and or love for me in her head. This is my first relationship, I’ve never been close with someone before. We have sex very often but a lot of the time while we do I just have a hard time believing that I’m actually pleasing her; or making her feel anything. I just go along though and try to be confident, I mean she acts like she enjoys it but I don’t know. I guess it sounds dumb cause why would she be with me all the time and do all these things with me if she didn’t actually love me? But my brain always makes some excuse, like she’s just using me to get over her ex, or that she’s just bored, and it’s constantly making me overthink and over analyze everything. It’s not like she’s doing anything wrong, but I really do sometimes think everything is fake. I don’t know why, cause I’ll be all happy and just in love but then I get this gut wrenching feeling it’s not real. No way anybody could actually love me, and feel feelings for me. I look at myself in the mirror and I often breakdown into tears and just wish I was living a different life, looking at a different me, I don’t like what I see and can’t imagine anybody else liking it either. I try not to let this ruin our moments, and make her unhappy or anything I just step away for a few minutes and try to calm down and just act confident and believe she’s really into me. But sometimes it’s like I just see her as some robot and I kind of lose my cool, I always step away for a while and let the emotions flow through me until I am done. Is something wrong with me? I just want to be happy, to believe something that seems so impossible to me. I just assume everything is a lie. It would feel so good just to know that somebody, without a doubt, loves you, and finds beauty in you. If you read all of this I appreciate it, this is kind of a vent but I also need genuine advice about this cause I don’t want this to ruin what we have. Thank you.

TLDR: I have a hard time imagining that my girlfriend loves me despite her doing nothing to show otherwise, cannot imagine that she has real love and attraction to me, need advice

2119
 
 
This is an automated archive.

The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Responsible-Fig-6857 on 2023-12-29 08:47:27+00:00.


We have been married for 11 years now. She has 5 kids and I have 2. Basically, we raises them together and they are all ours. A few of her kids have our grandbabies which I dearly love. We have had some serious issues over several years which led me to having a nervous break down. Mostly centered around my mom and step-dad and son. My parents used to live across the road. Well during that time I got the feeling she was cheating on me but really don't think it started then just my anxiety. Well I got over my anxiety without the help of a doctor or meds bit it took me several years. For the last two years I have been clean (is this best way to describe it) from anxiety. I knew we was still having issues this last summer and we talked about where we was and what she wanted to do. She said she wanted to work it out and stay together. She said she loved me but wasn't in love with me. So I seriously thought we was on the mend. Two days ago I was able to look at her phone, she seriously protected it for years, which did set my spider senses off. I'm not debating the ethical of me looking because I did it. Now i know and have proof. She has been sexting her ex fwb for last year. I really thought our life was moving in the right direction for our anniversary trip she gave me metallica concert tickets. We went to that and had a great time. However in the last set of text in December she told him things I can't type her because I am so broken right now. My birthday is tomorrow we are supposed to have Christmas party at her parents tomorrow all the family is supposed to be there. I don't want a divorce but how do I stay and ever trust her again. One of her kids wife is pregnant with twins and they are supposed to name it after me. It's not like I'm loosing her but all of her kids and grandbabies. I'm so broken hearted

How do you look at your spouse after they betray you. The crazy thing is this guy live around the corner from us and she has supposedly hanging out with his mother, who is a widower, but she knows about the prior relationship and all her kids know about this guy. So she has been going over there for years.

Is there any chance I recover our marriage she is all kinds of sweet on me know. I don't even understand because I've been asking for this women and now that I know that day I found out let her back out.

She told me if I wanted her to leave she will pack her stuff and go two of her kids lives with us.

I'm just broken and don't know what to do. My mom is of course screaming at me to leave my wife. But she did that with me over my ex.

I know reddit typically says divorce over stuff like this but I want to know has anyone ever been able to truly let it go and recover. I have forgiven her but I'm still very hurt.

TL;DR: : she has atm sexting her fwb she was with before we met over the last year but her also lives around corner from us ans she never told me but she goes and visist his mother.

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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/revolutionary42 on 2023-12-29 08:13:08+00:00.


We’ll call this friend Emily.

My close friend/coworker Emily and I have shared a lot with each other, we’re physically affectionate, she’s always hugging me and telling me how much she cares for me and loves me, we’ve seen each other cry, we’ve shared a lot of intimate and vulnerable moments, deep conversations, she knows me more than anyone at the bar. For months I thought she was into me because of it. A month ago I was drunk and she was sober, I tried to make a move on her. She rejected me, said she wasn’t attracted to me, that she’s never seen me that way and thinks us being together would be a bad idea, that it would only end badly. That she’s in no place to be having sex, date anyone or have any type of relationship. She told me she hasn’t had sex in 2 years and because of her past abusive relationship. I told her I wasn’t sure if I was looking for a relationship either and I wasn’t trying to sleep with her, but looking for something in between. She said she had no idea I was into her. That I misread our friendship. That she also wasn’t over her other ex, she would never date a coworker. That she loved our friendship and our dynamatic and wanted it to go back to the way it was before. We worked so hard to move past the awkwardness of it, we had so many long discussions about it, our feelings, getting back to the way things were. We got passed it, I moved on. I got comfortable with being close with her again and our long hugs without reading into it. I’ve been feeling good about our friendship and realized us dating would have been a mistake. I accepted that we could be physically affectionate without it meaning anything romantic.

In the past month since she’s rejected me, I’ve been feeling more confident, changing up my style, going out to bars and cold approaching women, getting numbers. I’ve trimmed up my beard, been drinking less alcohol, getting more compliments, I had a female coworker say I’ve been glowing lately.

I haven’t been seeing her as much. We’ve been working opposite times, I was also in the hospital for 2 weeks for an emergency surgery. As soon as she heard I was back, she ran to hug me. Later that night she told me she really missed me, I told her I missed her too. She got emotional about me being sick (I have chronic heart condition) she started crying. But of course I just took it as friends.

We work at a bar, on Christmas Eve she came in for some drinks with our other friends while I was working, she came up to hug me and rested her hand on my pec before hugging me, I’ve never had her put her hand there and it felt flirty. I went “oh” and kind of repositioned to move her hand away and hug her normally. I thought it was odd and rejected it. She stayed for a few hours, went home and this girl came in to sit at the bar. I was working behind the bar and the girl immediately started hitting on me as soon as I let her through the door, we hit it off and she directly asked for my number in front of my friends and hers. She was extremely interested and forward which is not something I’m used to from women.

Then me and Emily went to a friends party on Christmas, we were all drinking, she was sitting close to me on the couch, kissed my cheek when she got up, but she kisses all of our friends cheeks and all of us friends are physically affectionate with each other, and I’m over her so I didn’t take anything from it. She spent most of the night in the other room or on the balcony with our other female friend, away with the rest of the group. Id come to hang out with her sometimes but mostly stayed with the rest of our friends. I was talking to all of our friends in detail about the night before with the girl hitting on me, asking for my number, and my buddies that were working with me that night were boasting about how into me she was. They were hyping me up, and told me I should text her. She immediately texted back a few minutes later, I told them about it and they cheered me on. I didn’t know Emily was in the other room, I thought she was outside.

Then Emily, me and our other friend went outside to wait for Emily’s Uber. We’re all sitting on the driveway together, Emily and our friend start whispering to each other, I asked what the secret was and Emily said it was “girl talk” and then Emily asks me to smell her breath. I told her she was fine. Then she goes “I’m going to ask you something and be honest with me, are you still upset with what happened between us?” I laughed, I told her we’ve discussed this. I didn’t understand why she was bringing this back up, because we’ve been back to the way things were and I haven’t expressed any upset emotions. I’m always in a good mood with her. I said “No Emily, I’m good. We’re friends. I’ve moved on. I had a girl ask for my number last night and I’m talking to her.” She goes “I know, I heard. So you’re over me?” I assured her again “Yes, I’m over it. We’re okay” then something I didn’t expect, Emily says “Prove it, kiss me.” I laughed nervously because I didn’t expect it at all and I was confused. I’m like “What?” She goes “kiss me, as a friend. If you’re not lying” I’m like “How does kissing you prove I’m over you? What do you mean as a friend? Are you sure that’s a good idea?” And she kept insisting. She said “yes, just kiss me.” And closed her eyes and puckered her lips. So I went in and I kissed her. It was soft, short and sweet. We didn’t make out or anything but held it for a few seconds. Right after her Uber arrived, we hugged goodbye and she told me she loved me. Which she always does.

The next day she texted me “Sorry if I offended you last night by forcing you to kiss me 😂 Love you” I tried to be nonchalant about it so just responded “Lol not offended at all. You’re good. Sorry for my chapped lips tho”

Today at work she said I was being quiet (I was busy) and said she was so drunk and feels like she forced me to kiss her (because she kept asking me to) and felt so bad about it. I smiled, said I don’t do anything I dont want to do, and she smiled and said “okay” then a coworker came in and we didn’t get to finish talking about it.

I don’t know what to think. I really do love her so much as a friend. I care about our friendship. I have moved on since she rejected me, I’m not sure I have those same romantic feelings toward her anymore, I’m not interested in us dating. However, I enjoyed kissing her and I’m still attracted to her. I don’t mind being the type of friends that kiss or hook up sometimes, a no strings attached type of situation, but don’t know if this was a one time thing. I know she hasn’t kissed any of our friends. It just confuses me because a month ago she was so adamant about rejecting me, rejected me when I tried to kiss her and told me she wasn’t attracted to me. I don’t understand her logic behind kissing her to prove I’m over her.

Does anyone have any insight on this? What’s she meant by kiss me if you’re over me? Or why she did this? This whole situation has confused me.

TL;DR best friend rejected me, said she loved our friendship, saw I moved on, kissed me while drunk

2121
 
 
This is an automated archive.

The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/revolutionary42 on 2023-12-29 08:13:08+00:00.


We’ll call this friend Emily.

My close friend/coworker Emily and I have shared a lot with each other, we’re physically affectionate, she’s always hugging me and telling me how much she cares for me and loves me, we’ve seen each other cry, we’ve shared a lot of intimate and vulnerable moments, deep conversations, she knows me more than anyone at the bar. For months I thought she was into me because of it. A month ago I was drunk and she was sober, I tried to make a move on her. She rejected me, said she wasn’t attracted to me, that she’s never seen me that way and thinks us being together would be a bad idea, that it would only end badly. That she’s in no place to be having sex, date anyone or have any type of relationship. She told me she hasn’t had sex in 2 years and because of her past abusive relationship. I told her I wasn’t sure if I was looking for a relationship either and I wasn’t trying to sleep with her, but looking for something in between. She said she had no idea I was into her. That I misread our friendship. That she also wasn’t over her other ex, she would never date a coworker. That she loved our friendship and our dynamatic and wanted it to go back to the way it was before. We worked so hard to move past the awkwardness of it, we had so many long discussions about it, our feelings, getting back to the way things were. We got passed it, I moved on. I got comfortable with being close with her again and our long hugs without reading into it. I’ve been feeling good about our friendship and realized us dating would have been a mistake. I accepted that we could be physically affectionate without it meaning anything romantic.

In the past month since she’s rejected me, I’ve been feeling more confident, changing up my style, going out to bars and cold approaching women, getting numbers. I’ve trimmed up my beard, been drinking less alcohol, getting more compliments, I had a female coworker say I’ve been glowing lately.

I haven’t been seeing her as much. We’ve been working opposite times, I was also in the hospital for 2 weeks for an emergency surgery. As soon as she heard I was back, she ran to hug me. Later that night she told me she really missed me, I told her I missed her too. She got emotional about me being sick (I have chronic heart condition) she started crying. But of course I just took it as friends.

We work at a bar, on Christmas Eve she came in for some drinks with our other friends while I was working, she came up to hug me and rested her hand on my pec before hugging me, I’ve never had her put her hand there and it felt flirty. I went “oh” and kind of repositioned to move her hand away and hug her normally. I thought it was odd and rejected it. She stayed for a few hours, went home and this girl came in to sit at the bar. I was working behind the bar and the girl immediately started hitting on me as soon as I let her through the door, we hit it off and she directly asked for my number in front of my friends and hers. She was extremely interested and forward which is not something I’m used to from women.

Then me and Emily went to a friends party on Christmas, we were all drinking, she was sitting close to me on the couch, kissed my cheek when she got up, but she kisses all of our friends cheeks and all of us friends are physically affectionate with each other, and I’m over her so I didn’t take anything from it. She spent most of the night in the other room or on the balcony with our other female friend, away with the rest of the group. Id come to hang out with her sometimes but mostly stayed with the rest of our friends. I was talking to all of our friends in detail about the night before with the girl hitting on me, asking for my number, and my buddies that were working with me that night were boasting about how into me she was. They were hyping me up, and told me I should text her. She immediately texted back a few minutes later, I told them about it and they cheered me on. I didn’t know Emily was in the other room, I thought she was outside.

Then Emily, me and our other friend went outside to wait for Emily’s Uber. We’re all sitting on the driveway together, Emily and our friend start whispering to each other, I asked what the secret was and Emily said it was “girl talk” and then Emily asks me to smell her breath. I told her she was fine. Then she goes “I’m going to ask you something and be honest with me, are you still upset with what happened between us?” I laughed, I told her we’ve discussed this. I didn’t understand why she was bringing this back up, because we’ve been back to the way things were and I haven’t expressed any upset emotions. I’m always in a good mood with her. I said “No Emily, I’m good. We’re friends. I’ve moved on. I had a girl ask for my number last night and I’m talking to her.” She goes “I know, I heard. So you’re over me?” I assured her again “Yes, I’m over it. We’re okay” then something I didn’t expect, Emily says “Prove it, kiss me.” I laughed nervously because I didn’t expect it at all and I was confused. I’m like “What?” She goes “kiss me, as a friend. If you’re not lying” I’m like “How does kissing you prove I’m over you? What do you mean as a friend? Are you sure that’s a good idea?” And she kept insisting. She said “yes, just kiss me.” And closed her eyes and puckered her lips. So I went in and I kissed her. It was soft, short and sweet. We didn’t make out or anything but held it for a few seconds. Right after her Uber arrived, we hugged goodbye and she told me she loved me. Which she always does.

The next day she texted me “Sorry if I offended you last night by forcing you to kiss me 😂 Love you” I tried to be nonchalant about it so just responded “Lol not offended at all. You’re good. Sorry for my chapped lips tho”

Today at work she said I was being quiet (I was busy) and said she was so drunk and feels like she forced me to kiss her (because she kept asking me to) and felt so bad about it. I smiled, said I don’t do anything I dont want to do, and she smiled and said “okay” then a coworker came in and we didn’t get to finish talking about it.

I don’t know what to think. I really do love her so much as a friend. I care about our friendship. I have moved on since she rejected me, I’m not sure I have those same romantic feelings toward her anymore, I’m not interested in us dating. However, I enjoyed kissing her and I’m still attracted to her. I don’t mind being the type of friends that kiss or hook up sometimes, a no strings attached type of situation, but don’t know if this was a one time thing. I know she hasn’t kissed any of our friends. It just confuses me because a month ago she was so adamant about rejecting me, rejected me when I tried to kiss her and told me she wasn’t attracted to me. I don’t understand her logic behind kissing her to prove I’m over her.

Does anyone have any insight on this? What’s she meant by kiss me if you’re over me? Or why she did this? This whole situation has confused me.

TL;DR best friend rejected me, said she loved our friendship, saw I moved on, kissed me while drunk

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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Zestyclose_Dirt2687 on 2023-12-29 08:05:33+00:00.


During online classes when Covid hit back in 2020, I started talking to this girl who is in my class. She had many insecurities, had complaints that noone has proposed to her and so on. After a month or two of talking, I realized I was getting very close to her that I started having feelings for her. I didn't tell her this immediately, it was only after 5 or 6 more months that I told her about it. She's from an orthodox Christian family and I am a Christian too. So it seemed like a perfect match. But when I told her about my feelings, she said she can't have a relationship due to family. She hasn't said explicitly that she doesn't like me either. Our situationship turned out to be kind of an FWB too, for a while. Nothing too serious but just the foreplay kind. End of the day, we were very close, won't go even a single day without conversing.

After spending enough time with her, I understood that she was kind of possessive, didn't like me playing video games with my friends. She wanted me to spend time with her watch Chinese Dramas and what not. Which I did, even though I didn't like them very much. I ended up sacrificing my interests for her, became a completely different person for her. She would give me the silent treatment if I made her sad too. In a way, you could say she did manipulate my mind. I'd feel sorry and go begging for her presence again.

To be brutally honest, I did want to break off what we had since I knew she wouldn't do any good for me if she was my girlfriend. We were not compatible, I came to know. What actually prevented me from breaking it off during college was finals were coming up, I didn't wanna put myself, and her through a harsh time which could affect her grades. So I stuck through with her till the end of college.

For better background, I used to do everything with her. I took care of her while she was sick during our college trip. Gave her company when noone was there. Even drew her picture, and studied with her.

Post-college, I joined a private company for employment, she was also selected but due to join 2 months later. This was the best time to slowly pull away from the situation, I thought. So I reduced my frequency of interacting with her. She was visibly affected by this. 2 months later, she joins the company with some of my other classmates. I've noticed that she was getting close to one of the other guys I knew. At first I thought they were just being good friends, being together for work and all. 2 months have passed since she joined. I used to send her reels occasionally, hinting at the fact that I still cared. Then occasional messages faded away and I just stopped talking to her.

2 weeks ago from today, she asked me for a bike ride and big packet of chips. Sure, I did both of that for her. After the ride, she told me to ride even faster next time so she can give better "hugs". Alright, I thought we were good. Couple of days ago, my friend mentioned that they were both committed to each other (the guy who I mentioned earlier). I couldn't believe it so I asked my friend to show me the chat between him and her. And yeah, I saw it. I cried like I never have before. Anger was pent up, it was overflowing. I didn't know what to do.

Matter of fact, in my mind I think I'd be okay if she was with some other guy. Her being with this guy, just lowered my self-worth, and now in my mind I'm considering myself being lower than him. I've taken a massive hit to my self esteem, and I don't know how to move on from this. When I did everything I could, I sacrificed a part of me to be with her. And still I got played. Please give advice on how to deal with this situation. Thank you. Oh, and did I mention he's of another religion too? Yeah, that happened.

Tl;dr - My girl bestfriend is now in a relationship with another guy who she met 2 months earlier, when I gave my everything for her and made her happy.

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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Opposite_Seaweed6929 on 2023-12-29 08:03:04+00:00.


Hi Reddit ,

Im not sure wherr to start here. My wife is sedning me videos and telling me she wants to leave me. She is showing me photos of her sister getting a car as a gift and lpokomg down on me for struggling financially this month. I am not a dead beat as i pay the rent and have my money out in investments . I also paid for a very expensive wedding that she really wanted and honeymoon and told her we would have to sacrifice later for and my industry is experiencing a downturn at the moment. Im not too worried as i discovered how to pivot and expect a large sum of cash next month and moving forward. Im concerned becuase she had brought up how her sister or friends get treated with gifts or nice houses but they all married older men ( about 7-10 year older than me) and im younger than my wife . She ruined a proposal in Greece becuase she kept saying concerning things and went on a tirade about how im not the type of person she thought i was becuase i didnt get her engagement ring but i let her go on and on and showed her the ring after and told her we are not going to work but she begged me and convinced me to stay. She has been a great partner but i feel like she expects me to be someone else and is not happy with me . Im also concern3d that maybe i have my bar low on what love is becuase my last gf cheated on me and maybe im letting alot more slide becuase of how loyal and suppprtive my current partner is. . She had left me a few times and i was clear with what i thought i should and should not pay for and let her leave and she came back to me and after careful thought and her saying these material things are not important to her i took her back. She also slapped me the day before we were going to go to our wedding during an argument but her and my mom convinced me to still have the wedding. I know its terrible timing but we now have a baby . I fele like if she is thretening this i am better off leaving first so my baby grows up as a norm of co parenting and i dont waste more time then i already have as it seems these inflection points where she is sorry or whatever she forgets and acts like i am failing somwhere . We live in a nice part of town and traveled alot before the baby and are by no means struggling ( just a rough patch this month) but we could do better and i aspire as much. Im not sure what to do. I have not beem the o Perfect partner either. I struggled with alcohol and she supported me . I been sober for months now and feel fine . I never hit her before although she did hit me again recently and pulled my hair. I let it go because of the baby and lack of sleep . Am i being to forgiving here ? Wanted some thoughts. One note is after she slapped me before the wedding i had the wedding but never signed the marriage certificate to see how things would go so seperating wont be a drawn out divorce scenario as i was never legally married . I love her and she is good person but these are real red flags for the future and i feel like i ignored too many now to not oay serious attention

Td;lr wife constantly compares me to her sister and friends older rich husbands and what they provide and talks down to me acts uoset becuase i am not doing the sane like buying a new car for her . We have a baby and she is threatening to leave but i feel like i have more reason to leave since ive been honest this whole time and feel like she hasnt . I still love her and she is a good persin but we have problems

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This is an automated archive.

The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/heretowrite2019 on 2023-12-29 07:46:18+00:00.


It may sound weird but hear me out there’s this park that set up a beautiful Christmas light display throughout the park

I wanted to take him to a rooftop in town (at night) that I think is beautiful to listen to music and take a few shots first, then go and walk in that park and talk & checkout the lights?

He’s going through a rough time right now (a lot of loss) so I don’t want to do anything too overwhelming.

I know walking can be awkward but I feel like the lights will help, and I’d rather not sit across from him like dinner so I don’t feel like I need to keep talking

Hopefully we can hold hands & take a break to make out a bit on a park bench too lol 😂

We’ve known each other about a month and have made out/ hung out a few times around family & at his place (introduced by them) but haven’t had a date or gotten too deep.

I’m just looking for fun rn and to get to know him better.

TLDR: is a walk in the park a good date idea after drinks?

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This is an automated archive.

The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/heretowrite2019 on 2023-12-29 07:46:18+00:00.


It may sound weird but hear me out there’s this park that set up a beautiful Christmas light display throughout the park

I wanted to take him to a rooftop in town (at night) that I think is beautiful to listen to music and take a few shots first, then go and walk in that park and talk & checkout the lights?

He’s going through a rough time right now (a lot of loss) so I don’t want to do anything too overwhelming.

I know walking can be awkward but I feel like the lights will help, and I’d rather not sit across from him like dinner so I don’t feel like I need to keep talking

Hopefully we can hold hands & take a break to make out a bit on a park bench too lol 😂

We’ve known each other about a month and have made out/ hung out a few times around family & at his place (introduced by them) but haven’t had a date or gotten too deep.

I’m just looking for fun rn and to get to know him better.

TLDR: is a walk in the park a good date idea after drinks?

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