this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2023
57 points (96.7% liked)
196
4676 readers
817 users here now
Be sure to follow the rule before you head out.
Rule: You must post before you leave.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
Umm, people can definitely change how others view them. And if person A refuses to accept person B for who they are, that doesn’t define person B. It defines person A as an asshole.
Agree. And that sentence is not only valid for gender, it's for any other cultural label (like genders are).
If I say that I'm a gamer, or a fan of star wars, or whatever, and you're spending your energy trying to convince the world I'm not what I said... it says much more about you than about me.
How about race? Can white people elect to be Black?
This is a bad faith argument, and at best a whataboutism. They aren't remotely related.
Are you aware of a good rebuttal to the comment you replied to? It tends to trip me up as even through it's often presented in bad faith, our concept of race is mostly cultural too isn't it? It feels like they're different somehow, but I can't articulate the reason why and so it's like I've stumbled into a "gotcha".
But what kind of people put so much energy into trying to show person A that it is indeed the case? Person A may be an asshole to refuse the evidence, but person B could also be selfish to take a lot of energy into convincing person A of something that might not be apparent or even might not even reflect reality. It doesn't mean that one is more right than the other or being disrespectful. Truth hurts after all. But then, if someone keep repeating the truth, maybe that person becomes an asshole. Or maybe we should ask this person if it is indeed an asshole to not misslabel them an asshole and hurt its feeling.
Describing intentionally misgendering someone as "truth" is simply transphobia. Be better.