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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Sp0okySnixX on 2024-01-23 07:10:11+00:00.
I've (F) been friends with Lindsay for a few years now. We met in collage.
My first impression of their relationship was BAD. After class, her and me, along with some other friends (all male) went out for lunch. She offered to drive us all, on the way there she declined a call from bf, and sorta jokingly said "I'm not allowed to have men as passengers" we quickly said that if her bf was that controlling that wasn't a person worthy of being with. In the end, she spent half the outing crying in the restroom cause the bf got upset we all carpooled to the restaurant with her, and that included our male friends.
A while back the dude emotionally cheated on her, he was sending pics to a girl's DM. Not nudes, but flexing pics cause he's a gym rat of sorts and he wanted to hear other girls appreciate how big his biceps where lmao. The girl found out he had a girlfriend and told my friend and showed her the convo. She was extremely upset and I thought that was going to be the end. She broke up with him.... for a day, and then they got back together.
It's specially hard cause they're all up in each others lives. She works for him in his small bussiness. And he leases the work place from her family. In class, instead of listening to lectures and presentations shes working on stuff for said business cause he's always asking for it. She has skipped important classes to go work on things he deemed "urgent". And I don't think they're drawing a line on whats relationship and whats profesional, that's why she went so long without pay.
She has told me like 4 times in the time we've been friends how unhappy she is with him. The most recent was a few weeks ago at a party. I'd say we were tipsy, still fully conscious but chattier than usual. she said, "oh I was just thinking about how sad I am about hiding part of my sexuality cause I'm with bf, and that I wish I were single to explore more on that" we were dumbfounded cause what does one even reply to that. She continued "I don't know what to do" and I said "seems like you do tho" and she said "break up with him? I don't think I can, like, I want to and I know I want to... but I don't think I'm capable of actually doing it" and that fucking broke my heart.
I have zero control over her life, and while I believe people should make their own choices, this feels weird. What if she ends up stuck with him forever? What if I try to help her by saying something but she takes it the wrong way? They're so codependent I don't even know if it's possible for them to become individuals again. They´ve been together for 5+ years so it seems more unlikely as time passes, but she's so vocal about it all that I hope she's just psyching up to gain courage and go through with it.