this post was submitted on 07 Feb 2024
656 points (98.7% liked)

Greentext

4964 readers
2117 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
all 24 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 86 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Which beetle looks like a giraffe?

The Giraffe Wevil! It's insane that these exist. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Giraffe_weevil

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Fine body like a construction crane.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Me when I meet a tall suitor

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Weevils are very cool. I only recently became aware of them.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Why, pray, is the shortest watch called the "dog watch"? Because it's CUR-TAILED! Hah! I have you sir, you're dished!

Killick, Killick there! Light along with the Madiera!

The Aubrey-Maturin books are some of my dearest favorites, and the movie is great fun too.

[–] [email protected] 58 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

There’s a beetle that secretes a burning / poisonous substance whenever it has sex and the female will gladly cover the eggs in said poison to deter predators from eating them.

This same poison (cantharidin) can be used topically to treat molluscum contagiosum bumps which is a very common virus that affects children for putting their hands absolutely on all dirty surfaces but also in grown adults in the form of a sexually transmitted disease.

Some places consider it an aphrodisiac but it’s just a poison. Don’t eat it.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago

Ok I won't, I'll just keep licking frogs for those intense psychedelic trips instead.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 year ago

These godjaks or whatever are the best trend in a while I've seen over there

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

I always believed in You. But only for the bad things. I humbly and respectfully thank You for making the ways in which You work less mysterious.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Fireflies are beetles as well, perhaps even my favorite.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago

I'm too lazy to fact check this, so it must be true

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I wish to hear more about this master plan of his.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago

I hear it involves giving cancer to little kids.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Anon caught some ennui off a Discworld novel

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

an inordinate fondness for beetles

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Fucker made cockroaches and is probably proud because they are so resilient. This is a beatle planet that happens to have humans

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

Given that like 25% of all known species are beetles this seems to track

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

beetles would have had sentience first but they didnt eat the apple