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How to discuss trans issues to uneducated people? (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 2 years ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Hi, I have a transmasc boyfriend and am part of the LGBTQ+ alliance. However I started my first year of college and encountered uneducated men who just did not believe that trans people had their rights under attack. One of my friends even told my trans woman friend that she had more rights than him. How or what can you do to help others become educated without "debating trans existence" or starting an argument? Thank you.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

There is a stark difference between the average opinion in online spaces and in real life. Most people will just flat out not care. Talk about golf or the weather or something.

[+] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago (3 children)

[deleted]

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

I think this is solid advice, for more topics than just trans debates. I personally try to stick to speaking from my perspective, i.e. "I had no clue about the experience trans persons have, so I kept an open mind and tried to understand their perspectives on that matter."

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

I don't entirely agree. I think there's plenty of people who will listen and will realize that they aren't well informed. Just... There's even more people that will be like talking to a brick wall and you have to be aware of that so you don't get burnt out. Some people need to be treated like a lost cause. Trying to convince them will just depress you. It's also perfectly valid to not bother trying to convince anyone because of this.

But there absolutely are some people who will listen and change their mind. Myself, I was that way, growing up in a small town echo chamber and learning an embarrassingly large amount when I went to university. I've also personally convinced several others myself. But it can feel like depressingly few people are like that. I think because most people that you see who are uneducated are willfully so. These kinda social issues have been in the limelight for a while, so few people are unaware of them anymore.

I think the people who are most likely to change their minds are those who were previously in echo chambers (such as from rural areas or less progressive countries). Anyone else has already had too many chances to change.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

Tbh, I don't know much beyond "transgender people exist". No idea about any nuances, the exact kinds of transgender, the differences etc. There seems to be a lot more to it than "trans men/women", and I feel a bit ignorant trying to make sense of terms like "asexual" by their dictionary definitions.

I've so far been living by the motto "be a decent person", considering myself open-minded and tolerant, but if there are good sources of information with an overview of all this, please drop me a link.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 years ago

You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.

I think it’s fine to want to educate the undereducated, but the reality is they’ll never learn unless they want to learn. So when they say something ignorant, you can just say that hasn’t been your experience.

If they ask for more you can share your experience. If they’re still interested then you can open it up to the broader national or global narrative.

I feel for you and your loved ones and I hope you have success finding and building allies in your community.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 years ago (2 children)

To say something controversial: maybe listen to what they have to say and try to understand why they think what they think, instead of assuming that you're automatically right and just need to educate them.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I think its pretty weird if you say trans people are treated equally, let alone more rights. It's still a societal problem we have in a lot of places and in my experience all I meet that are trans have some sucky times because of other people...

[–] [email protected] -2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

To be fair there is an entire month dedicated to LGBT pride.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

There wouldn’t need to be a month dedicated to pride if lgbt people weren’t discriminated against.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 years ago

Thats the issue though. They dont think, Ive tried asking them about stuff and they'll parrot things like "puberty blockers kill people." then I show them that study was wrong and they just dont believe me lol.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 years ago

You could try dropping the condescending tone. Just because someone disagrees with you doesn't mean he is uneducated.

I would also recommend being polite and using the charity principle. You generally won't change someone's mind by berating him.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 2 years ago

I like to figuratively give people shovels and let them dig themselves into a hole. A lot of people I talk to don't really have good evidence, they've just been convinced by someone louder than them.

Ask genuine questions, not debate me bro style, for explanations. If they're open minded, maybe they'll question things. If they're closed minded, you were never gonna get anywhere with them.