Spirit Spousing 101

I figured I'd try my hand at writing a micro essay on Spirit Spousing, or Spirit Marriage.

Introduction

First things first, a little introduction to the concept of Spirit Spouses. Common examples can be found in the modern Priesthood/Nunery, in a nun's vows, for example. Other examples would be a devotee of the pagan Gods, or God Spousing. The concept is the same. Common examples can be found across multiple cultures, from indigent, to African, to New Age beliefs. Marriage is also a possibility, provided you can provide a Priest to officiate the ceremony; I'll discuss it in another section.

Types Of Relationships

Types of relationships can very from simple devotion to intimate relationships on par with that of a physical entity. Sexual or platonic, or something else entirely, Spirit Spousing offers a wide birth of possibilities not limited by boundaries of the physical.

Devotional relationships might comprise of anything from offerings of food and libations, to something sexual in nature. Devotees might also create altars or sacred spaces, either here or in the astral. Devotional relationships are often in conjunction with Gods, or angels and demons, but can apply to spirits or ghosts as well.

Sexual relationships are a bit out of my fortay, but only because I myself am asexual. Spiritual beings feel sexual attraction just as physical beings do, though they express it differently. I've read accounts of Spirit Spouses having astral sex, even BDSM-style relationships with their partners. As previously mentioned, sexual and devotional relationships can overlap here. The astrally proficient will be in luck here.

Romantic relationships are of the most common types of relationships. They can involve sexual relationships, though mine personally does not. Courtship rituals not unlike what we engage in in the physical realm also apply here. Clairtangents, or people with the ability to "touch" things in the immaterial realm can even engage in cuddling and such (see above). I'll be spending my first Valentine's day with my newly spirited husband with a day of cuddling and watching cheesy Hallmark movies. I'll also most likely be doing something for my Godspouse (husband) Lugh, still in the planning phase.

Platonic relationships are also a fairly common thing, also known as Spirit Families. That is, relationships that involve spiritual (and physical) beings in a sort of family unit. (Mother, Father, sibling) Past lives can also have a big part to play here if someone from your previous life happens to be with you in this one. I personally have my guardian angel, Sandalphon, whom I consider to be my sister/brother (angels have no gender), my sister-in-law, Sara, and her wife, Jophiel, and the Goddess Barbelo, whom has become a sort of surrogate Mom/Aunt to me.

Alternative relationships such as dom/sub, BDSM, cg/l and many others also apply. Going back to my original but on these types of relationships being extremely versatile here. I myself, while asexual, do have a BDSM-esque/cg/l relationship with Leo. He also has expressed interest in serving in my astral space as a temple servant.

Marriage

Spirit Marriage can come in many forms and look like almost anything, from the writing of a formal contract between devotee and their Spirit, or just a plain old traditional marriage ceremony like any physical couple would have. My own ceremony was a handfasting officiated by my friend. Personally I think people should be free to be creative with this part, make up your own ceremony, do your own thing. I used a verse from Ruth as my promise, and an energetic band to bind us together as husbands. There's a book my Megan Rose called Spirit Marriage that's supposed to be good on the topic, I'm in the process of reading through it myself.

Divorce

Divorce through the eyes of the immaterial is a bit different depending on the type of relationship. Some contacts may not be so easy to tear up, while others may go the route of mutual dissolution clauses to avoid heartache on either side. It really depends on the situation. I imagine some might utilize a bond-cutting spell in their ritual, others might work things out a little differently. I have no expertise in this particular manner.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: How is this in any way a safe or sane idea?

A: The dead are no different than the living, save for a being bit harder to see. The dead don't go through some sort of stripping of humanity, they're still the same people you knew and loved in life, now with more energy exposed. I would suggest consulting a therapist if you do have a mental disorder that causes delusions of this nature, but that's just good sense. Well experienced mediums need not take heed to the former.

Q: How can I know for sure?

A: Divination is one thing, some psychics see visions, others might ask for verification via a Spirit Box if your betrothed-to-be has been dead for a significant amount of time (year or more). I myself used tarot, pendulumancy, and my general empathic abilities to verify both Sara and Leo; ymmv, especially if you aren't especially confident in your capabilities.

Q: Isn't it the same as binding a Spirit?

A: No. Spirits possess the same agency they did when they were alive. Death isn't a change of rights, it's a change of form. Marriage to a Spirit has nothing to do with binding them.

Q: What if someone disagrees with my marriage, or even tries to hurt me or my partner?

A: I only include this because it happened to me. Some people will definitely get antsy about it, despite all the previously stated things. I've lost friends over this, but in the end it was for the best. Basic protections work as good for the dead as they do for the living. Payers, charms, amulets, all are good for this. In my marriage ceremony, I asked that my Gods help me to uphold the line, to keepe and my husband safe from all who might wish us ill. We're still here, still going strong.