this post was submitted on 26 Feb 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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all 18 comments
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[–] [email protected] 8 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

Reminds me of Dragon Age: Origins.
- Cut scene starts.
- Camera shows some guy: "Please you have to help me! My daughter needs for her wedding this evening. Fetch them for me immediately!"
- Camera switches to my party.
- All of them wearing heavy armor, carrying big and nasty weapons and still soaked in blood from top to bottom from the last battle: "Sure. By Andraste, let's go!"

[–] [email protected] 4 points 12 hours ago
  • Brings "5x ceramic plate"
  • Receives "Sword Of Total Pwnage" which has been a family heirloom for centuries.
[–] [email protected] 9 points 21 hours ago (2 children)

"Was" young? He's canonically 6 years old. Just wait until he really starts growing.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 18 hours ago

and his juvenile plumage falls off to reveal his adult mating colors, also he’s gonna grow a gigantic claw on each foot.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 15 hours ago

And now bird flu is coming along to stunt his growth

[–] [email protected] 2 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Bold of you to assume that Big Bird isn't eternall and unchanging. Before the universe was created, Big Bird was there. When the last protron decays at the end of time, Big Bird will be there. He is always present, unyielding, and Big.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 17 hours ago

Big Bird flipped off the Blind Idiot God.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Other night had a Big Bird dream. I remember because i woke up in the middle of a debate with myself about Big Bird's height.

But in the dream whenever Big Bird got mad at some one he would just bend over and projectile fluid dump on that person

[–] [email protected] 1 points 15 hours ago

mess with the bird you get the turd

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

No, he was even bigger and he has been shrinking.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

He could've always been big for his age

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

I said it once and I'll say it again! Big Birdie.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Sesame street characters don't have names. They are referred to by their species.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

The fuck species is an Elmo?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 15 hours ago

I heard once he was a saint. Very on brand for the catholic church because I also heard he was a pedophile.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 21 hours ago

All of them are the last of their kind, and the whole show is just an intricate way of preserving them in their natural habitat. This is why the show can not end. Even after we have colonized the galaxy and most of us are off to find a better life, some will stay behind, filming the new season, unchanged, unending.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago

When you are invited to a meeting and you know you are the wrong person, but you don't say nothing, because you want to waste peoples time and see the whole fucking world burn.