People are seriously confusing the fact that Lemmy being open source means all the admins are privacy evangelists that are going to do everything they can to protect privacy. That’s absolutely not the case. Pick and choose your instances based on those measures but you are going to be hard pressed to find many, if any, who are going to offer anything close to perfect privacy due to the huge overhead involved.
I’m not going to engage every point here but on #3, mitigating a DDOS is not just simply closing down firewall ports. As a matter of fact without a distributed IP space for you’re more than likely going to assist the attack by shutting out your own users. You need methods to absorb and deflect that traffic. That’s a lot of infrastructure that is NOT available to last typical VPS.
It’s not a matter of finding instances that are on board with those things so much as You’ll be hard pressed to find an instance that cares either way.
While I’m a huge advocate on many of these topics the correct answer is still select your instance based on your criteria. Your evangelism is wasted on 99% of the populace.