this post was submitted on 15 Feb 2025
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Lots of things like grey hair, moving more slowly, injuries that I would have bounced away from before instead hurting for weeks or months.
But the one that hit hardest was a breakup I had a little while back. She was the love of my life and I fully intended to marry her, and when she ended it out of nowhere I was sad, but fine. She dumped me, and it sucked, but I also needed to finish a staff report for a Planning and Zoning Commission meeting that night. So I moved on.
The thing that upset me most was that I wasn't that upset. There was a time in my life when I would have been a mess. But as I've aged, my emotions have become more regulated.
I miss being capable of that level of joy and pain.
Love definitely hits different in your 20's. Though, the plus side is when something ends I don't obsess over it like I did as a young man.
I remember in the mid-2010's when Guns n Roses decided to reunite and tour, and my first thought was: "Why would I want to watch Axl Rose now that he's old and fat?" That was a sign.
I had a similar experience a few years ago. I haven't even tried dating again because trying to rework my life to incorporate another person at this point just sounds like a giant pain in the ass and I'm old enough now that it seems like everyone I meet around my age who's still single is living a train wreck of a life so it wouldn't be worth the effort anyway.