this post was submitted on 06 Jun 2023
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Making friends in adulthood (beehaw.org)
submitted 2 years ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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Is it really harder to find true, meaningful friendships (not romantic and/or sexual) in more 'adult' years or is this an introverts problem? I am quite introverted at first, I would never just start a friendly conversation with a stranger and work friends usually are just work friends. I moved to UK in 2019 and since then I had few different jobs and connected with people from work, but none of them wanted to stay in touch outside work. I was a bit confused, as I thought those people enjoyed my company as much I did theirs. Not even sure if this is maybe a cultural thing? I grew up in Poland and Eastern European people are more direct than British, so you know straight away of they like you or not. What are your experiences? How do you deal with meeting new people?

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 years ago

I think it's more of a structural issue. During adolescence we're incentivized to socialize with others. School is a community environment, with one of its primary functions being to socialize people gradually into adulthood. Once out of this environment, building connections with others takes active effort. No longer are we encouraged to make friends by our surroundings.

A lot of great places to meet new people and start to form bonds with them are community or interest groups. If you have a hobby or want to get into one, there are generally plenty of options in your local area. Sites like Meetup can be a great starting place for finding these kinds of groups