Ask

I dunno.

I think probably the whole idea of chasing marriage early. There's some degree of pressure even now for young adults to pursue marriage as a goal. Which, if that's what you really want, go for it.

But I never saw marriage as something to chase for the sake of being married.

For me, it was and is about having a partner, a person who is the other half of me. The person is what matters, not the fact of being together.

I can't say whether or not things would have been better or worse had I been more actively seeking a spouse. I likely would have been a father sooner. I probably would have had less short term partners, and medium term ones as well.

But I also wouldn't have the life I have now. And while there's stuff I certainly wish I could magic away, the partner I have and our kid aren't on that list.

Because I wasn't chasing the idea of being part of a couple, when the right person came into my life, I was able to allow it to happen organically. The experiences in the past made me better prepared to do my part of things. It all made me a better partner than I would have been at 25 or even 30.