this post was submitted on 20 Feb 2024
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And I don't mean things you previously had no strong opinion about.

What is a belief you used to hold that you no longer do, and what/who made you change your mind about it?

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago

For a long time I thought the whole pronoun /name /being outta the closet thing didn't personally matter to me to make the effort to attempt to change it.

Yeah I figured out I was trans at age 21 in the quite distant past but like my partner had sex characteristic preferences that meant that as long as I prioritized him in my long term goals I wasn't physically changing. I figured you know boo hoo I was ugly and people didn't really get me most of the time but you know... Big deal? I was stable enough. I wasn't under particular hardship because aside from some vague presentation pressure from time to time everyone just basically accepted I was quirky and liked me enough without putting much emphasis on my gender anyway... I ended up trying gender neutral pronouns basically as a lark, a way of proving to myself that I was fine.

Turns out I was not fine.

I didn't realize how shit I felt on a regular basis nor how much less energy all my social connections would need once I made the changeover. I really didn't realize that such a tiny thing was subtly poisoning every single interaction I had with people. I stopped experiencing stress heartburn and headaches after time spent with friends. I was usually pretty quiet and withdrawn but I actually started being generally more gregarious and active. I stopped feeling invisible and lonely. I went from low key disliking people to actually liking them. It was like someone suddenly replaced my batteries. I never expected something so small to make so big a difference.