this post was submitted on 05 Mar 2024
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The Monkey's Paw

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Want to make a wish? Just ask the Monkey’s Paw! No strings attached.*

Just create a post that starts with “I wish ___”. Other users will then grant you the wish, and probably not how you intended.

^(*)^ ^Strings^ ^definitely^ ^attached.^ ^Satisfaction^ ^not^ ^guaranteed.^ ^Wish^ ^will^ ^likely^ ^backfire.^

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Granted.

A sandstorm whips across your area, blasting the dirt and grime from your desk, as well as a quarter inch of the deck material, your house, and anything else aboveground. That includes your friends and neighbors, which raises a mixed mist of sand and blood at the end of the storm, which settles onto your nicely blasted fence, leaving a lovely coat of blood as paint.

Also, I now have to write that up as lyrics for a metal band.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

The sequel to Bloodtrocution.