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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/ThrowRaVinnieB21 on 2024-01-23 03:02:09+00:00.
My (M23) girlfriend (F23) and I have been dating for two years now. I was a swimmer in college, but since graduating, I've gained a little bit of weight. Nothing crazy, but I'm 5'11, and 170 lbs, up from ~145 in college. I used to have abs, but I haven't really cared as much about working out anymore, since I just feel comfortable in our relationship, and I know she doesn't care what my body looks like.
We recently went out on a double date with some friends that I haven't seen in a while, Jack and Erica (fake names). We're all having a good time at dinner, joking around. Jack and I have known each other for a long time, and always tease each other, so he makes fun of me and says that it looks like I've gotten a bit chubby since we last saw each other. I laugh it off since that's how we've always been, and since it's not really true, I just have a slight gut now. His girlfriend Erica joins in and says that Jack has been working on his beer belly too, which Jack definitely has put on a few pounds recently like me. Jack says that we've both put on some happy relationship weight gain and grown guts. I say that I got the Boyfriend 20, joking that I've gained 20 pounds while dating my girlfriend. The conversation changed from there, but we were all laughing about it.
Once we get home, my girlfriend says that I embarrassed her in front of my friends by saying that I said she made me fat. I get upset because she just inadvertently called me fat when I never said that at all, just that I had gained weight. I told her that I was just joking and that she shouldn't have taken it so seriously, especially because Erica was making the same type of jokes about Jack. I was also frustrated because she was making me feel bad about my weight gain, which I had never really cared about before. I told her that I know I'm responsible for myself getting a little chubby, but I didn't really care because I felt less pressure to look perfect while dating her. I guess this was the wrong thing to say because she got more upset.
Am I the asshole?