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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/mumadvice6933 on 2024-01-22 21:13:14+00:00.
So for context my partner and I have been together for just under 2 years but we've known each other for around 10 years since going to college together.
When we first started dating my MIL would introduce me to people excitedly about being part of the family and quote he'd "daughter in law" eventhough we are not married.
Last year everything changed. In January I had a problem with my eyes where I had to go to hospital for serious migraines and blurred vision, when I told my partner (25M) about this he came straight home from work to look after my daughter (his now step daughter) without me asking. Thankfully the doctors didn't find anything seriously wrong and I regained full sight.
Now since this incident my Mil scolded me and berated me for my partner coming home to take care of me and my daughter (he's in the army). Just the prefix, I didn't ask him to come home and he done it anyway saying that "we are family".
I had a follow up appointment at the opticians where my MIL just so happened to be there and this is where she first berated me in front of a load of strangers. Now I told my partner about this straight away and he was furious with his mother and told me that he would talk to her about it. However when he went to meet her, he didn't bring it up and she reiterated that i should have called my family as a priority.
Since this incident there have been a few times where my MIL has excluded me from family gatherings and is asking for lore 1 on 1 time with her son without myself and my daughter present.
There has been a recent incident where I had to tell my MIL for overstepping one of mine AND my daughters boundaries and I have expressed this to my partner but says he now doesn't want to get involved.
My MIL is now blaming any negative mood on going through menopause and saying she's having really low moments which is one of the reasons my partner isn't talking to her about me and accepting her current behaviour with our family.
AITA for now being cautious about bringing my daughter and future child (I am currently pregnant) around my MIL with her behaviour as she's been actively excluding me and my daughter out of family get together and overstepping boundaries that have been expressed multiple times and over crossed.
My partner is now saying he will not get involved because he doesn't want to upset his mother and be "piggy in the middle" when I have told him how much its upset me.