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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Important-Author-689 on 2024-01-22 23:09:50+00:00.
AITA for asking my (39f) roommate (40somethingm) to wipe his shit smears off the toilet bowl after using the toilet?
So I've been living with a friend since halfway last year and he has a habit of leaving shit streaks on the toilet bowl of our shared bathroom. It's not an occasional issue - it's constant. And he just leaves it, shit smears collecting for months at a time. There's a separate toilet closer to my bedroom which I use exclusively now because that toilet is so gross (which I clean regularly). I refuse to clean his shit so that toilet just gets left to fester. The only shower is in the shared bathroom so just not going in there is not an option.
I've spoken to him a few times about this but it seems like we have misunderstood each other as we just had another sit down conversation about it and I had to fully spell it out - after you poop, have a look to see if there's poop on the bowl and if so, wipe it up. He looked at me like I was crazy and said I was being ridiculous.
Things got pretty tense and he demanded that I explain to him exactly what I expected of him - did I expect him to clean the entire bowl? Even down to the water line? Even if his hand would get wet? (I actually had to explain that I use the brush in this case). Do I expect him to wipe up every single speck of shit, every single time?
I said I was willing to compromise - perhaps instead of every single time he could just commit to cleaning the toilet once per week instead. He insisted that no amount of compromise would leave him feeling better about it because he doesn't believe he should have to do it, so he would just do it exactly the way I want, but that he would move out at the end of the lease. This is probably for the best after this exchange, but the whole thing has left me absolutely reeling and wondering if my expectations are unrealistic. AITA?