this post was submitted on 07 Oct 2024
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And Finally...

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Two men were found with kinder eggs filled with drugs up their bums as they tried to get into Creamfields. Marshall Maddock and Harry Hewitson were about to enter the north gate of the festival site before a drugs dog indicated to police that the pair may have illegal drugs.

When both were taken to a nearby area to be searched by officers, Maddock handed over a small quantity of drugs but refused to be searched further. Because of his refusal, an intimate search was conducted where officers found a kinder egg containing 10 bags of ketamine in his anus.

Hewitson also refused to be searched, claiming he didn't have any drugs, but when officers searched him he was also found to have a kinder egg with 10 bags of ketamine inside hidden in his anus. Appearing at Chester Crown Court, on Friday, October 4, the pair were handed sentences totalling 36 months in prison.

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[–] [email protected] 30 points 4 months ago

Talk about a k-hole!

[–] [email protected] 27 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Ah, the war on drugs. What a colossal policy failure.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago

I miss qualudes so much

[–] [email protected] 17 points 4 months ago

Why can't people take their drugs the way they prefer?? Geez.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Maybe I'm an ignorant about these things, but wouldn't a kinder egg melt in there?

[–] [email protected] 24 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I think, they've put the ketamine into the plastic shells which are inside the Kinder chocolate eggs and used those, not the chocolate egg shells.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Ah ok. Seems pretty risky. Also kind of surprised that getting caught with some drugs at a music festival means a cavity search.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Exactly what I was thinking, at ATG all that happens is you get asked if you have any glass, they don't even search you.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago

That's my experience as well. Glass (or I guess weapons) is all they checked for.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 months ago (2 children)

I'm gonna take a guess that they mean the small plastic toy containers from inside the eggs and not the entire things.

I mean, it's not top tier chocolate but that would seem wasteful to me.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago

You don't want to spoil the Surprise.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I assumed it was some new way to infuse the drug into your body. Like a story I heard many years ago about girls soaking tampons in vodka to get drunk at school without being caught.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago

Ohoho, the tampon trick isn't just for girls. It goes up your pooper and isn't very healthy.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 months ago

The little plastic orange thing inside the kinder eggs that holds the toy. Not the chocolate egg.

Really boys? The condom is much more comfortable.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 months ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago

Because of their refusal an immediate search was conducted 🤣

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Boofing K is one thing, but boofing kinder eggs is new to me

[–] zcd 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I could never get the egg in without cracking it :'(

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 months ago
[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago

Kinder Bueno

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago

I wonder who cleans oit those "amnesty bins" at the end of the festival lol.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

So if you refuse to be searched, they just say "welp, you had your chance. Now bend over while big Al gets the gloves. Sorry, we're out of lube."

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago

Pretty much. With the indication from the sniffer dog they have probable cause, so your options boil down to the rough way or the rougher way.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago

Sounds like so much work

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago

You can smell how special it is

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago

Would love to hear the line of reasoning that led to the intersection of Kinder eggs, drugs, and bums.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Sounds like we're going to need a new warning label....

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

"Don't let the filth catch you with this up your botty?"

Doesn't seem appropriate for a kiddie treat but they have to learn the lesson eventually.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago

Pedantry corner: the product is Kinder Eggs, kinder eggs are something else entirely.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago

I would have liked to hear to brain storming session that lead to this brilliant plan.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago

You can see it on their faces. Those guys are basically enlightened now

[–] [email protected] -1 points 4 months ago

That's one way to get someone to finger your butthole