It's a toss up.
The one that was an immediate hell no, mixed with the wtf and "is this motherfucker trolling me?" was back in maybe 96 or so.
It wasn't a blind date, we'd run into each other at a gathering, and when our mutual friends suggested a date for us, it seemed like it was worth it.
We get to this place I suggested as being really casual, but really yummy food, for a dinner date. In the back and forth of setting it up, she wanted it to be very casual, shorts and sandals level of casual as an option, and the place fit that perfectly. What folks here in the south call a fish camp.
Anyway, we get there, sit down, and the waitress comes over and asks if we're ready. This woman looks at the waitress, then at me and says she needs a few minutes.
Once the waitress leaves, she leans in and asks "did you know there were insert slur for black folks here working at this place?".
I was flummoxed. Like, yeah, this is the south, some people are like that. But damn. How did nobody warn me the woman was like that? Or was she fucking with me.
So I asked her if she was fucking with me.
She said "not if you're a reinsert slur lover."
I said I was, and said she could feel free to fuck right off out the door. Which she did after causing a bit of a scene cussing at me.
The mutual friends claimed to not have known, and I believed them because they're the sort to not notice little signs, someone would have to be blatant before they'd catch it.
The other one was a great date, but it was still a wtf moment.
Similarly, we had met through a friend, and had talked a few times. Now, I knew the lady through a friend that was into some kinky stuff, and knew that she was too. This wasn't a problem, we had discussed that I'm almost vanilla, and she isn't, so it might not end up going anywhere. That mutual friend, if you're at one of his gatherings, chances are you'll run into people that go to his other kind of gatherings that have plenty of lube and maybe some rope involved. But they're all really nice people in general.
This, however, was the first time there was a vibe with someone. She was just cool. An artist, and an accountant, doing both professionally. She was into martial arts as a hobby, so not as deep into it as I was at the time, but deep enough we could talk and mess around with techniques. Similar music tastes, we liked the same kind of poetry and fiction. I'm saying that before she asked me out, we had talked a good bit at our friend's place.
So, we get to the diner we'd picked. It doesn't exist any more, but at the time it was the best hamburger you could get in three counties. We both loved the place already, so it seemed a good fit.
We eat, have a great time, and are sipping coffee as we chat.
She looks at me, dead in the eye and pulls out her dentures, swishes them in her water glass, and says "am I putting these back in, or am I sucking your dick in the car?"
She did not put them back in.