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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/neanzof on 2023-09-25 02:14:31.
I’m beyond crushed. We’ve only been dating for 6 months, but we’ve been friends for 4 years and I’ve always had a crush on him, so I was very emotionally attached to him and this revelation was so, so heartbreaking.
I never thought he was like that. I realise now I probably had an idealised version of him in my mind, but I can’t think of any red flags that I missed.
He never initiated conversations about politics, but he always seemed to agree whenever I said something feminist/pro LGBTQ+ etc. I had no idea he was pretending.
He never said anything sexist or problematic in front of me. He wasn’t a vocal feminist, but I’ve always thought he had feminist opinions, more than most men I’ve ever known.
Long story short, I found out he’s been a fan of Andrew Tate for a while now, and apparently when I’m not around, he shares conservative sexist and homophobic views that I would never guess he had (I learned this from a male cousin that sometimes hangs out with him).
Of course, I broke up with him. But I’m still so sad, confused and angry. I feel like all these years have been a lie. It sucks when you find out someone isn’t who you thought he was. I don’t really need advice I guess, I just really wanted to share this with someone who might have experienced something similar and I didn’t know where else to post it.
Edit: thank you guys for all these lovely comments🥺