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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/buttonmoo on 2023-10-03 14:34:48.
I'm a wedding photographer. I hired a male second shooter for last weekends wedding.
This is mainly a rant. Sorry (not sorry)
I've just had it AGAIN. Solid portfolio and the majority of the images are quite good.
During the ceremony, came to the top to shoot the same angle I was because "there was nothing to see" I had to practically bark at him to get back into position ready for the readings, because he refused when I whisper asked him too first.
Also stood in the frame for the first kiss (I was at the bottom of the aisle now) when the minister actually stepped aside for a change 😭 Ive had a word with him about this, but the response is "oh yeah I'd usually do that" but why not now? The kiss lasted like 15 seconds there was time to step aside;
I tell them ahead of time to be where I'm not, but they come and stand next to me, like the confetti exit, asking whether they should shoot wide or close, I have a wide and a zoom on I don't need someone standing next to me hindering my movements! But there's guests too close and the couple are about to exit so I just say "zoom" my images suffer because of this. This has happened a few separate time with different men now.
I just feel like this every time I work with a man. I feel like they don't want to do what I'm telling them, and they're questioning why I'm asking them to do things.
With women seconds I never have this issue. I set expectations, tell them where to go, and they seem to be more aware of when they might be in my frame.
I almost feel like men are competing with me to get 'the shot' . Like I've hired you you're supposed to be backing me up and being where I can't be not spoiling my pictures!
It's one of the main reasons I left a male dominated field (engineering). I felt belittled and disrespected constantly.
I don't think I'll ever hire a male second again.