Fedigrow

check my edit lol

I am not going there specifically because most women-only communities I have been in have complaining about sexist men and the patriarchy, and this one will allow it. I come to internet communities to have fun, not to doom about other people facing oppression and how some day my bubble will pop and I'll face it too (yay for being a counter example to "every woman has a [sexual assault] story" because I do not and god I hope it stays that way). I understand the value of a support community, I have just repeatedly found that most support communities end up being unhealthy places for me specifically.

Especially because they almost always "punch up" at the majority, and I understand why it happens but holy hell do I really not want to see it, makes me all kinds of uncomfortable and angry even though I am usually part of the minority demographic punching and not the majority getting punched at. My energy is far better used fighting for minority rights in real life than getting pissed at them online (and tbh I'll probably never stop getting mad when I see that kind of language, yes I know their explanations and justifications for it which is why I stay out of their communities so I don't see the upsetting talk instead of lecturing them on why they should not vent frustrations in a safe space for them cordoned off from the general public, where venting that does not make "obviously this is venting" and "this doesn't apply to everyone in the majority ever" disclaimers can be expected).

I wish them luck, and in their first days I did send a list of communities other women might like.