this post was submitted on 01 May 2025
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The Borderlands series has been a rapidly cooling corpse for years, now. Opinions differ on when the peak was, but it's undeniably past tense. If the sloppy handjob they called a movie wasn't any indication, I don't know what is.
Tiny Tina's Assault on Dragon Keep was the peak.
That's not a very apt metaphor for the film. At least a sloppy handjob can get the job done; the movie was just a stale puddle of piss on berber carpeting that won't even sink in because the result of the carpet is moist for some reason.
I don't disagree with any of that. 🤘🏼
I played the first 2 then years later i played three and it was just not interesting.
also this wonderlands thing...holy shit..so, yes, a slomo downfall.
Honestly I really love the idea of wonderlands, more dragon's keep is like alchemical gold, but it's so slow in a way that just doesn't feel like borderlands. Even 3 has better pacing.
And the writing feels like it's a Disney kids game at times.
That I don't mind. The only difference between my D&D campaign and a Disney game is the players ability to stab the king.
Ew. Your D&D games have psyops conditioning embedded in their themes & presentation? Uncool AF.
It's a thankless job, but someone has to make the next unibomber.
Mr. Rogers' alt's gotcha beat by decades. 🥲
What do you mean? Borderlands 3 was pretty great.
I didn't really like 3. Gameplay was fine, but there were too many annoying characters to make me want to replay it.
Tiny Tina's Wonderland dragged on so much and felt like a lot of inept pandering. So I wasn't as grumpy about how there wasn't really anything beyond the first playthrough. I remember just running through a bunch of areas towards the end just to finish it.
What a resoundingly confident, glowing review.