this post was submitted on 27 May 2024
861 points (99.7% liked)
196
17577 readers
1571 users here now
Be sure to follow the rule before you head out.
Rule: You must post before you leave.
Other rules
Behavior rules:
- No bigotry (transphobia, racism, etc…)
- No genocide denial
- No support for authoritarian behaviour (incl. Tankies)
- No namecalling
- Accounts from lemmygrad.ml, threads.net, or hexbear.net are held to higher standards
- Other things seen as cleary bad
Posting rules:
- No AI generated content (DALL-E etc…)
- No advertisements
- No gore / violence
- Mutual aid posts are not allowed
NSFW: NSFW content is permitted but it must be tagged and have content warnings. Anything that doesn't adhere to this will be removed. Content warnings should be added like: [penis], [explicit description of sex]. Non-sexualized breasts of any gender are not considered inappropriate and therefore do not need to be blurred/tagged.
If you have any questions, feel free to contact us on our matrix channel or email.
Other 196's:
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
i feel like this is my default state.
I still don't know how i feel about it. Am i a dumbass who can't communicate? Are others just fucking stupid? Who knows!
Neither. They expect us to figure out and speak in the flowery language and codes that they use, and get upset when we can't, when I feel like it would be easier for them to just -listen- to what we're saying, because it's usually in black and white.
Even as a neurotypical person, I ain't got time for that shit. Don't be using code phrases or softened language around me. If you have something you want to communicate, it's on you to meet sure your understood. It's not on me to infer your meaning.
ಠ_ಠ
Haha! Yes! You found my Easter egg! Good job!
~God fucking damn it~
Not when you're speaking in code...
nuance kinda important tbh
Not 100% sure what you're asking, but I think it's about the flowery language and "code"?
I'm just really direct, and get told I need to consider how I say things... The only example coming to mind is something I don't really want to talk about openly on Lemmy. I'll give a vague represantation though
(My statements are verbatim, the replies are paraphrased)
I'll say "You didn't do XYZ." - They say "But I have done X"
Next time I try "Have you done XYor Z?" - Then I hear "Why are you interrogating me?"
"What have you done?" - "Why are you being accusatory?"
Those are all plain and simple black and white questions. I have yet to figure out the code I was supposed to speak.
Those examples are from the same person, but I get this reaction from most people when I ask simple questions
Thanks for the insight. It'll be something to keep in mind going forward.
The place I experienced this the worst was a job where I was in a leadership position, lol. (I have since come to the conclusion that I'm not the leader type)
i find i often just make sure people understand the thing that im talking about, so that it's hard to misunderstand what im about to talk about. The side effect is that they learn about something that they may not have intended to, but are going to.
Both, I think. The fact that you're here on lemmy tells me that you probably care about how shit works, which makes you an outlier, and it's likely others who are stupid relative to you. On the other hand, you're probably a dumbass who talks with people like peers and doesn't know how to communicate with stupid people, or how to manage your expectations as stupid people will always misunderstand things no matter how good your communication skills are.