Dispensing Freedom.

I may have harvested my beets a little late.

Id get a medal for defending democracy.

i built a fortress for dwarves to brew and prosper inside

Attempting to win at poker with a collection of rocks, glass and, cards I have doodled on.

Having six throwing stars and a shitload of buffs... as a potato

Abandoning my post in defense of Super Earth. I am sorry, Democracy.

Having eleven kings in one poker hand.

Democracy (it was helldivers)

Public inebriation, disturbing the peace

(Rock and Stone ⛏️⛏️⛏️⛏️⛏️)

Falcon punching Pikachu.

Loving Managed Democracy too hard

Tax Fraud.

Capturing and enslaving weird magic animals

I didn't get arrested, because I suffer from a knee injury and my adventures have ended

Unlicensed space travel

Climbing a mountain but dying too much along the way. Like a little too much.

Unauthorized orbital rocket launches.

Supporting democracy!

Rotting in a Shinra prison for bombing a Mako reactor. In my defense, the new explosion graphics were great.

Possession of psychite with intention to distribute

and like, at least 3 or 4 warcrimes, but whose counting

Stealing villager's beds.

Using obscene amounts of violence to protect freedom and democracy across the galaxy.

Forcing a dragon to fuck a bear?

I guess I'll be getting arrested for helping people build a village.

Driving a giant tractor with a trailer full of soybeans the wrong way around a roundabout to deliver the soybeans to the grocery store.

Genocide

Murdering tens of thousands of natives in North America to build plantations to make money to build factories in England.

I think this is the kind of violence history books often frame as the "unfortunate side of progress", so I guess it's okay ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

PC: Politely asking for and engaging in street fights with random strangers.

Mobile: Baking cookies

Web: Making paperclips

Forcing thousands of grandmother's into endless work. Destroying ecosystems. Ravaging planets. Ending light itself. Enslaving Gods. And eliminating every parallel world in existence. All to make cookies. More and more. On and on and on. Universes of cookies more numerous than atoms in the cosmos.

But I'm almost done.

Failing to properly evacuate the city during a Tsunami because its easier just to clean up afterwards (Cities Skylines).

Disregarding all Osha violations, colonizing a planet and killing all natural life.

damm I love factorio

Elden Ring... soo.. lots of murder

Been playing Dorfromantik so building quaint, idyllic villages with expansive forests and streams.

Throwing a stick of dynamite into the middle of a kkk meeting outside of Rhodes. Sorry, not sorry.

Gambling fraud. I keep playing 5 of a kind Flush in Balanto and it keeps working!

Going a-víking and dismembering "a few" Englishmen...

Running a 75 ton Timberwolf Battlemech.

Pretty sure just turning the thing on would be enough to get me arrested. Civilians typically aren't allowed Surface To Surface missiles, and megawatt power lasers that are effective weapons at a range of over 1000m.

I'll have a 100 ton Madcat 2 soon.

Demolishing robots with a magnetic guitar-sword in beat with my rock playlist that plays in my heart.🤘

For yelling too loud.

Statement of an observing police officer:

They say ToxicWaste murdered that Salesman... with his voice! Shouted him apart!

Crushing LEGO villains and collecting silver, gold, and purple studs.