Ask Lemmy

I’ll walk into a park full of stoners, grab their attention and teleport home.

To the fridge. For a beer.

If it allowed me to teleport between dimensions as well, definitely moving to that one parallel Earth where everything is peaceful, prices are cheap, and everything is seemingly perfect (except for the lottery system where a small group of people die if they win in a population control sort of scheme). Don't take a lot of money and your odds of being picked are low.

Though, if it only worked for this world, probably just use it once to get to the kitchen faster at a random time because I can't use it to get to college because of my class schedule. That, and I'm pretty sure my parents would find it suspicious if I suddenly teleported to a store and called either needing a ride or they cannot find me, especially if I don't give them a heads up.

If we teleport to a moving object, can we equalize speeds in relation to it instead of our current reference? If yes, ISS - good luck getting me outta there! If no, I'll mumble "Shenzh/gen" and see if I end up in China or Luxembourg.

Maybe try wingsuit flying or free soloing, knowing that I basically have a get out of jail free card (assuming the teleport doesn't preserve my momentum I guess)

The closest Galactic Senate.

If one doesn't exist then teleport me to where one used to be. Let me see intelligent life. Or at least the remnants of one for a few seconds before I die.

The Eye of the Universe :;)

Do I have to use it on myself, or even a living being? Any constraints on size, weight, accessories?

Are you sure I can't save it in case I need to get out of the Backrooms some day?

Can the teleporter interpret intent, and will it take anything I'm currently carrying (like a backpack)? If so, then I'd probably take some time to figure out where I'd like to go (terrestrial or extraterrestrial, inhabited/life complexity, technology level, species appearance (if alien), government style, beliefs, etc) and then have the teleporter send me to the place that most closely matches my vision.

If not, then idk. I'd consider teleporting myself near the event horizon of a black hole, but I'd probably get vaporized the moment I teleported if it didn't come with some kinda invulnerable safety field.

do i keep my momentum after i have teleported?

To nearest Black Hole and die.

Can't I get a return trip? It's going to be annoying to get a train or plane to take me home.

Is this a one-way trip?

Teleport to my road trip destination. My wife can handle the last two hours herself. I'm too risk adverse to carry out a heist or something and that would really mess up our vacation. I'll just go ahead and get the hotel room ready and take a shower.

One way, no return trip, but I can get back eventually? I guess I'd teleport to work tomorrow but right when I'm supposed to be there and just act like I'd been there the whole time to see if anyone was confused.

The sun.

Peaceful alien society that will treat me like an honored pet, like a cat.