this post was submitted on 16 Jan 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] [email protected] 87 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 45 points 1 month ago

Russia has oligarchs. The west has successful entrepreneurs.

[–] [email protected] 53 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Why are people surprised? He's the president!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)

They meant the president of the USA

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (2 children)

They still have that? I thought it had been privatized?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

It has, Musk bought it.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

They kept the name of the position

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Yes, I am aware, I'm American, I just worded it poorly.

[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Good, now he’ll have a nice quiet space to focus on his path of exile character.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Do you think whoever actually plays his account will share the office?

Or will they be allowed to WFH.. lol

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)

He’ll rent out an office space an hours drive from them and make them do it there.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

An hour? Musk must be feeling generous.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Between that and Diablo 4 he needs a lot of time to work on getting good. Whoever is boosting his account is likely under a strict NDA, but Id love to hear their story.

[–] ColdWater 39 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

The us has been fucked for a long time. Only people who grew up in a supremely fucked place would allow what we see today. This is just the latest manifestation of fucked. Free Luigi!

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I don't see why he needs his own office when he'll be under Trump's desk gargling saggy nuts most of the time.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago (2 children)

You woefully have misunderstood the dynamic. Trump's the sub.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Regardless, I don't think there's need for a seperate office when they're insatiably sucking each other off all the time.

ETA: This is not a joke about them being gay or anything. They are just absolutely inseperable recently as if they're joined at the hip or something and I swear it can't just be purely professional. There's other shit going on.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Oh they both give off "We give each other blow jobs but no homo" energy

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

That was the before Presidential powers go back to Trump dynamic. After the 20th, they'll both be in a position where they could probably ruin the other, and I think the risk will be higher for Musk, especially because Trump doesn't really need him anymore (he'll have access to funds to keep him solvent) and has that presidential immunity to avoid consequences if a conflict escalates.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

I think you have it backwards. All Trump cares about us money, and compared to Musk, Trump is a pauper.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

as expected, i can't imagine how consort trump will run it without the president ceo.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago

Tragedy or comedy? Why not both.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Who do you think is the bottom in this relationship?

[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 month ago (1 children)

American citizens, they're all fucked.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Introducing the S.P.I.T.R.O.A.S.T. Act...

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

Single-Person Identity Tokens Regulating Online Activity for Social Tradition. Along with a SSN, each American citizen will be assigned a unique token to verify their identity on the internet in accordance with the DANK Act (Digital Activities Need Knowledge).

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

You give him too much credit, he doesn't have that much creativity. He would call it Doge-420-69, because that's the only joke he knows.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Frankly, if Musk were President instead of Trump, I'd be rather happier about this upcoming four years.

He can't be President absent amending the US Constitution, though, as he'd run afoul of the "natural-born citizen" requirement for the office.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

what's stopping the office of the infallable, god-king POTUS from just ordering it changed? the last decade has proven that the institutions made to act as guardrails against autocracy, bend in the wind with enough pressure

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

The President can't amend the Constitution. In fact, the entire federal government's only role -- not talking just the Executive Branch, but also the Legislative and Judicial -- is, in one of the two amendment routes, to propose the amendment. In the other, they have no involvement at all. The amending process is really a process done by the states.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

my point was less about it being changed at the snap of a finger and more about it just being flat out ignored, and everyone just going along with it because the alternative is "fight the fed / civil war"

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

A little DOGE hut at the foot of Trump's bed?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Does it have a mattress

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

How does this qualify as not the onion?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Wanna bet he is going to do remote "work"?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

National security? What's that?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Ukrainians in 2022 - We are very lucky they are so fucking stupid

Russian Mafia in 2025 - We are very lucky they are so fucking stupid