this post was submitted on 25 Jan 2025
348 points (96.8% liked)

Funny

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[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Instructions unclear: stuck hand up pussy and got voted in as President

[–] ininewcrow 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Ummmm .... sir ..... Mr president sir ..... that wasn't a pussy

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Doesn't matter ~~had sex~~ got elected

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

instructions unclear: lost the hand

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Y'know, you should consider yourself lucky.

You don't encounter vagina dentata every day.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago (3 children)

This is way off. Everybody knows the best way is to tell her to calm down. If it doesn't work the first time or seems to have the opposite effect, just do it again. Keep doing it and she will eventually stop.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Don't forget to point out that they're being irrational.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

And ask if it's that time of the month.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Works on men too!

With men make sure to point out that they are scaring everyone by showing any emotion other than feigned happiness. Women aren't threatening enough to need the extra step.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

I like to go for sexual advances. Still working on the specific lines, but I'm sure to find a winner soon. ;)

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Wrong. You hold a bag of Tacos in her face and say very firmly and confidently "The power of the Mexican Gods compells you, Evil Spirit. Leave this woman's body!"

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Dammit, beat me to it haha