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Not having to be available at the ready for people is great.
If you arrange for a call, through another asynchronous mechanism, then it's fine. If you cold-call me to ask about the weather (or, more seriously, anything that could have been a text message), I'll leave decapitated horse head in your fridge.
I want shit that leaves a record so when someone pulls a "I didn't say red", I can pull out the text or DM or whatever, and say, "So when you said red here was it that special red that's actually blue?"
For me, calls interrupt my workflow with things that don’t need immediate attention anyway. So it draws focus away unnecessarily.
I also prefer to have a written record of things if they’re important. That way you can always refer back to it. A phone call just annoys me at best and divides my attention. So it’s in their interest as well that I can respond when I’ve got time.
Two words for me. Read. Receipts. I have found that someone will inevitably text me and say, "why didn't you respond?" Fucker. You texted me. Want me to actually engage with you? Call me. Otherwise you're now at my mercy.
I prefer calling because it's easy to silence and just let it go to VM if I am busy. Call back immediately and that's usually a sign of being needed.
For me I hate phone calls because it's someone demanding I drop what I'm doing to address whatever they want. Keep in mind, 99% of phone calls I get are at work form co-workers.
The number of "quick calls" that are actually quick I can count on 1 hand, and still have room for more. I have tasks to accomplish, things to do. And I'm spread so thin between all the things I do, there's a fair chance I'm going to forget something about what you asked/told me. If it's in text form I can review it when I loop back to it. You need me to check/validate/run something, cool. I have record of what, when, and if I completed it. Just because you have a question does not make it an emergency on my part.
As for my home phone, the only folks who ever call me are either telemarketers or scams. If a friend called I'd probably answer (if I have the time). But I think most of my friends are in the same boat, we have so much to do these days (non-recreation) that it's just not easy to find time. A lot of my friends have side-hustles or a second job or are in class (like me) in order to stay competitive. When I was a kid, I remember my parents could unwind at the end of the day, friends would just come over to hang out. It just ain't like that no more.
Just because you have a question does not make it an emergency on my part.
This is it for me. If someone is an auditory processor, or needs a more nuanced conversation in order to understand something, I sympathize. But not everyone is like that. Just send a quick message asking to chat (or better yet, find time on my calendar if it's for work), and then I can prepare what I know on the subject, review it, and get back to you.
Otherwise you're going to get an ear full of ummmmmmmmmmmmmmm
uhhhhh hmm
hang on, I was just
hang on, just loooking that upp....
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scrolllll
Right, so
(silence while I'm reading)
Right, uh, so
Okay
It was last Tuesday
Was that it?
Majority scam
I say this as an autist who used to fucking loathe talking on the phone: Its that the phone takes up too much mental energy and time, yet has a time limit on your own responses. Its hellishly stressful when you are socially incompetent, and now a lot of even non-autistic people are becoming socially incompetent.
Now its funny, I hated phone calls back when everyone liked them. Now I'm pretty OK at them because I worked at a call center for a year and now it seems like everyone now hates phone calls. I kinda recognize that the one nice thing about phone calls is there is no "set up your account before ordering your food" type bullshit. There is a consistency to phone calls.
I don't want to talk.
How did voicemail (or voice message) make it above skywriting?