this post was submitted on 08 Feb 2025
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Programmer Humor

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 days ago (1 children)

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 days ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 days ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 days ago

What about chicken? That programming language is clearly written for chickens

Whitespace is obviously written for space, not for humans

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I dunno, whitespace is a programming language and I don't know who that's for :P

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 days ago
[–] [email protected] 55 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Here's a Malbolge print statement:

('&%:9]!~}|z2xwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)('&%$#"!~}|{zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba`_^]\[ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA@?>=<;:9876543210/.-,+*)

Good luck.

EDIT: I think I gave ChatGPT an aneurysm

[–] [email protected] 41 points 1 week ago (1 children)

A language from and for assholes, very human.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Much letters, great verbosity, the design is very human.

[–] caseyweederman 5 points 6 days ago

Easy to use.

[–] [email protected] 51 points 1 week ago (3 children)

No they are not, some are made for obtuse assholes by obtuse assholes.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 days ago

Brainfuck comes to mind

[–] caseyweederman 3 points 6 days ago
[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 week ago (1 children)

What could be more human than that?

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Condescendingly always saying you are too busy doing important things to write good documentation.

[–] corsicanguppy 1 points 6 days ago (1 children)

When there are a lot of fires, firemen don't shine their tyres a lot.

The metrics don't measure documentation; just code. The behaviour of coders is a victim of that.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 days ago

no disagreement there really

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 week ago (2 children)

So why did we do such a bad fucking job

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Do you mean that programming languages are hard to read/write, or that the languages themselves are poorly designed?

In the former case, I invite you to read machine code. Not assembly, but straight machine code. Just zeros and ones as far as the editor can see. Any popular language is better than that.

In the latter case, I invite you to look at the design of an arbitrary natural language. Weird grammer rules, regional differences, loan words that don't fit in, etc. No programmming language is worse than that. Although I would argue that Javascript has all of those problems too in some degree.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 6 days ago (3 children)

I mean that they are poorly designed. And year regular languages are just as badly designed. I'd say c++ is just as bad as javascript tbh.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Go, Ruby, and Python are all pretty great

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I do really love python. Just wish they did stronger typing.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

If that's the case I highly suggest you check out Golang. It's got strict types like Java but it's a lot more intuitive and expressive than either Java or C#.

My favorite language is Ruby, for those same reasons, but Go would be a better fit for someone who likes strong typing with a certain je ne sais qoui.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 days ago

C++ is just an exceptionally badly designed language.

The weakness of C++ is that it attempted to be backwards compatible with C. It’s like it’s trying to be two programming languages at once.

And then it became like three languages at once when smart pointers became the norm. It makes it very difficult and confusing to learn.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 6 days ago

Take a look at Rust. It's what I'd call an exceptionally well defined language.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Front end versus back end. The people who make programming languages are back-end developers. Their strengths lie with making something that works, not something that looks pretty.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

I beg to differ

I can read plain-text PHP, Python or Ruby code.
I can't read plain-text, uncoloured HTML or Vue code.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago

I can't read plain-text, uncoloured HTML

That's all we had back in the day. The only difference that jumps out to me is having attributes, but that's still not that crazy. Even back when I did web stuff, I used notepad++ without any particular higlighting the vast majority of the time for plain HTML (though not JS).

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 days ago

I would argue backend languages are infinitely Easter than frontend

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I hate to spoil your fun but IRs are made to be written by programs and read by programs.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 week ago

That's why we don't call them "programming language" even though they are the same kind of thing.