What if I went from great student to degenerate drug addict and don't have a degree?
this post was submitted on 09 Mar 2025
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ADHD
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You forgot the great student to drug addict to surviving lost grad student path.
The 'gifted kid' to drug addict pipeline
This is the way.
Real life is more complex than college. It's unlikely you'll find a pattern. There's just too much chaos.
I went with medication. Now when the chaos hits, I can reflect and choose to pivot.
Thanks for the reflections
I haven't yet. But just got diagnosed AuDHD at age 29, should be getting on a stimulant this week and I think that will help a lot.
Nice. Same here. AuDHD at 29. Got a chance to try out methylfenidate. Trying 27mg slow release now. The lower dose of 18mg did nothing, but fucked me up after a week of trying out.
So far so good. Gonna warn you though, it still takes work, but it's easier to "just do stuff." It's as if I have a gas pedal now, instead of a button to move the car. As if I can choose to work at a lower rpm. Running on idle is possible now, and being idle (such as waiting 15min for the train) doesn't bother me. As if I can choose what to allocate working memory to. Allowing me to manage my dyslexia and high associative thinking better.
I also notice satiety and thirst. Something I didn't feel before.
I can quit stop doing "fun" stuff and switch to doing "less fun" stuff. Going from playing a video game, to studying! It never worked this way. I was only ever able to start study in the morning. Once I caved into gaming, it was game over.
Reading is hard, but I am managing to get myself to start reading. I seem to be able to do stuff even when I don't "feel" like doing it. Like laundry! Still hard, but not impossible.
Does nothing for my forgerfulness though, and the mental hyperactivity isn't zen. So the dose may be still too low for me. I was only able to experience "the zen" with 10mg fast working on the testing day. But the rebound caused me to experience something akin to a stroke and pass out for 5min and wake up in confusion.
It's an alien experience.
I'm chiming in though I completely crashed and burned during my uni. I don't do well with abstract consequences, the further they are from actually affecting me the less I can function. Once my mum kicked me out of the house I went from 0-100 real fast. Unfortunately seeing as I was made redundant a year ago but am comfortable financially, I have no incentive to do much lately. It's a work in progress.
You assume is was organized or focused in school or college as opposed to just generally curious enough to know tons of information while also being able to focus on lectures (because most were in topics I was interested in, especially in college) without taking lots of notes that made me pretty good at tests.
The reality? I got diagnosed and on meds and looking to therapy to close the gap. It turns out my grades were driven by good test taking and an ability to churn out a BS ridden paper that should have taken weeks in a day or two of pure panic. I have never needed to take a test at work to get my job done, and have grown weary of the panic fueled rushes to get things done by deadlines.
My college highlight was starting a 6 page paper on a book I never read, five hours before it was due. Got a B.
Thanks for sharing! I also recently thrice best under that insane pressure but I don’t love it.
I took as many summer courses as I could because it condensed a whole semester into a month. 3hr classes a day, test at the end of every week. I HAD to start studying and do homework at a certain time or I wouldn't finish before it would cut way too much into my sleep. A whole month of regimented heavy pressure to do my work. Those were my best grades.
Yeah, it's okay when the work isn't super challenging or you can stay on top of the workload coming in. But when the work becomes actually challenging and/or you start getting too much to stay on top of naturally it leads to burnout really fast which just sucks (like I've contemplated quitting a job I generally really like from it).
You don't! Or at least I didn't. Slowly finding habits that help me care for myself on a somewhat regular basis. Accepting I have limits and moderating my activity accordingly. Modifying my environment to keep me on track enough.
Make doing things important to me easy and saying goodbye to lower priority stuff I can't manage. Finding a balance I can keep. Being realistic about what I can and can't commit to.
Sorry. I was the opposite. College was a slow decline as I burned out. Literally started first semester with straight A's and ended my fifth year (yeah not a good idea to grab another major) with mix of c's and d's. If I had gone any longer I would have washed out.
I don't. Organization and focus is overrated, I thrive without them no problem.
I went from top of the class to "smart, but lacking effort" before I got to high school.
Haven't really moved on from that phase since.
I use tools. Lists for home projects and chores. For work I use JIRA to organize tasks. Seems to help me. I don't take any medication yet because I was recently diagnosed.
I haven't gotten back to that yet.
But I'm on meds now. So the next thing I'm gonna try to do is fill my schedule a bit more. If I'm doing more, that's less time for my brain to fill that time with analysis paralysis and more time doing stuff I enjoy. The byproduct, hopefully, is that my brain will just be happier overall with the added stimulation. Or so the theory goes, at least.
Personally, I use Hemi-Sync focus frequencies.
What does this mean
Hemi-Sync is the process of playing two frequencies, one in each ear, together to put your brain in sync.
From the official channel for an explanation - https://youtube.com/watch?v=JbA1T6AfEnw
One of the audios, I use. https://youtube.com/watch?v=-vXb0-ME68I
Sounds like "binaural beats." AKA pseudoscience...
But hey, the placebo effect is very real so if it works for you, it works.
We create our own realities with our minds. Maybe the placebo effect works because of that. I hope you figure out a way to help you ♥️