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Don't be mean. I promise to do my best to judge that fairly.
The only reason why clothes get staticky in the dryer is because of the heat. If you run the dryer for 10-20min after drying with no heat they'll come out without a trace of static.
Ive stopped using softener and dryer sheets a while ago; just detergent and for the first load of the week (usually towels) a short cycle with vinegar to clear up any mineral deposits left by my horribly bad hard water.
It also makes the clothes extremely flammable.
A bit of alcohol vinegar can replace or help fabric softener.
I have a friend that would make his own clothes soap. It looked like semen, but worked.
Totally in with the 'make your own soap' mentality. I've been making my own laundry soap and liquid hand soap for ~6mo, and I'm still working through the first set of supplies I got for both. Only downside to making it yourself is the time commitment, but I've got it to a point where once I have the batter made, I just throw it and some distilled water into a covered mason jar, put in a covered stock pot with enough water to get around the inner water level and just let it simmer for a few hours.
It's actually super simple to make my laundry soap, it's just a 6:6:2:1 ratio:
Baking soda:Epson salt:washing soda:sea salt
Works great and take the smell out of my potty training son's laundry.
Nobody's mentioend laundry detergent sheets yet? Super cheap. I buy the Poesie brand. 160 sheets in a box for $9.49. That's just under 6¢ per load. For my two loads of laundry per week, a box lasts me a year and a half.
Bonus: the box takes up almost no space, 6" x 5" x 3".
Also, white vinegar is an awesome replacement for fabric softener!
Fabric softener / dryer sheets make clothing feel disgustingly slimy.