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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/insomnia_popcorn on 2023-09-24 21:54:46.

So I installed a ring doorbell camera today and when I came inside and saw the footage that it caught of me installing it, I was mortified. The angle was sort of under chin level and like a fisheye lens.

I feel like I’m fairly attractive looking (I have good days and bad days but sometimes feel better than others) but when I’m caught from a low angle I look like a beast. Does this happen to everyone or do I maybe just have a warped sense of what I look like? I was totally shocked and now I’m wondering if angles do this to everyone. Is it possible to be decent looking and then just really ugly from another angle?

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/MrsRobertshaw on 2023-09-24 21:25:16.

My husband and I have a great marriage, two beautiful kids, loads of fun, active life etc. everything’s great.

We made a joint decision we were done having kids so he got a vasectomy.

We followed the guidelines to the letter and he did a home test that was no sperm content detected.

That was two months ago - I’ve had a period since then. But this month my pms symptoms feel a lot like pregnancy symptoms so I’m just waiting for my period to arrive.

My husband said if I was pregnant he would be taking me straight to get a test (paternity test). I said if you asked me for a paternity test I’d be asking for divorce.

He was shocked!

I explained this soon after the vasectomy etc and also the lack of trust - does he really believe I’m raw dogging some guy behind his back??!! Wtf!!??

What would you do?

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Youfemmeism on 2023-09-24 21:08:28.

My stalker is persistent! He waits in front of my house when I walk my dog, knowing I have to come home eventually. I avoid him by staying as far away as possible, even though sometimes he'll sit there for hours. I don't want to enter with him so close to the door, that's why I wait for him to go away instead of immediately going home. I walk my dog at different times of the day, every day, to try to avoid him. The police already told me, multiple times, until he attacks, rapes, or murders me, there's absolutely nothing they can or will do because sitting and waiting outside my house is not a crime. Has anyone managed to successfully get rid of an unwanted stalker?

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Holiday_Work372 on 2023-09-24 18:45:30.

I’ve met him several times because he’s my friend’s (20F) friend. Once he even gave me a lift and it was one of the most uncomfortable lifts in my life When I asked my friend if she had known he asked me out she said she didn’t but… started persuading me that ‘who knows what future holds’ (idk, me for example?) and ‘maybe something will change as we meet more’ (we meet only when she takes me to her friends, by now I’ve met that guy for max 4 times). I’ve got annoyed and I was assertive - I told her that my no means no I rejected that guy clearly - I told him we can only be friends (I can’t avoid him forever, sometimes I’ll meet him so that’s why I said that, all I want is a positive, ‘correct’ relationship without any hostility). He said he respects that but maybe I’d like to be friends, even to meet in a group. I said I’ll probably see him from time to time, mostly because of my friend etc. now he still keeps texting me, I respond him once a day or two days but he still doesn’t take a hint I’m going to a party to our friend and he’s supposed to be there. I’m a little bit worried because I don’t want him to give me a lift after that and I’m a little bit scared he gets obtrusive if he decides to drink. I’m also worried my friends won’t take my ‘no’ seriously What should I do? I don’t really have any opportunity to avoid him forever and also don’t want my friends group or the party become messed up because of that situation TL;DR; I rejected a guy but he keeps texting me and idk what to do about that

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/throwaway4891kid on 2023-09-24 18:18:02.

I went on a very good first date last night. Probably the best and easiest date ever…2.5 hours of easy convo. I have been dating for 4+ years and have not connected with anyone on all levels. It was weird because when he said something or I said something, it was just like “yeah..” because we totally got it and shared the same unusual perspecrive on things. He was shocked at times, I could tell by his facial expressions lol. He is cute too, not my usual type but I am attracted. And I could tell he was attracted to me, and he complimented me a lot.

It was only the first date tho. And we spent about 5 days communicating beforehand (we met on a dating app).

What gives me pause is that he told me he is moving to another major city that is about a 4 hour drive (or 3 hour train ride) from me for 6 months. It’s a city I always love to visit and envisioned living for a bit. I was just in the city a couple weeks ago and told my friend “every time time I’m here, I want to move here.” I even job hunted there a few years ago before covid but now I work remotely full time. He said he understands if its a dealbreaker but that its not for him, and that he would make all of the effort to do long distance. He said he would text, face time daily and take the train on weeekends but of course would love if I visited him. It was the first date so I thought it was premature, so I said we can figure it out when we get there. He did want to know how I felt about his move generally, and he said I could take my time thinking about it.

I asked if he planned to move back to my city after the 6 months and he admitted its not his favorite place but that his business is based here and he would settle here if his partner was here. He is giving up his place here.

I’m in my late 30s and he is 40.

Honestly if I knew he was leaving, I probably would have not gone on the date. He leaves in 2 months and asked me out again and I do want to continue seeing him. I like him, something about him feels good in a healthy way but I am afraid of falling for someone and investing time in someone who is moving.

I am continuing to date other people. But I am experienced enough to know that the way we were in sync is rare.

What should I do?!

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Modern_Snow_White on 2023-09-24 19:41:46.

Today my brother (26f) vented to me (30f) about his colleagues. Apparently they were planning a trip with like 6 of them, but when it came to choosing a destination they had, what my brother called, "a weird fixation" on Thailand and the Philippines. After pushing why other countries were not an option, they told him that "they have beautiful ladies there".

My brother, finding it an odd reason, asked why they had to go all the way to Thailand for that, while Spain and Italy have gorgeous women too. They answered: "those women are useless, you can look but you can't touch. In Thailand women are nice to you, they serve you, you get a massage whenever you want and they don't discuss. They know how to behave".

He was totally disgusted by the realisation that they were planning a sex tourism trip. He said he doesn't feel like going anymore, to which his colleagues started about all the other "virtues" of Southeast-Asian women, and how "wortheless" Western women are. It basically boiled down to Western women being high maintenance and difficult.

My brother is a very principled person, so he stood his ground, and told them: "guess I'm just not desperate enough to treat women like vending machines" (refering to the money in- sex out concept).

I'm honestly proud of him that he stood his ground and told them they were pathetic. I know that it should be a normal thing, but in reality it's sadly enough not like that.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/SauronOMordor on 2023-09-24 18:01:59.

I am a cishet woman but I often feel very in tune with my more masculine energy and I would like to express that part of me more in the way I dress.

The problem is I have an extremely large chest (42H) so it's hard to find tops that neither make me look chubby and blocky or accentuate my breasts. I also can't wear button up tops. I dunno if it's really possible for me to dress androgynously for this reason.

I don't dress super feminine either, but I try to wear clothes that hang nicely off the body I have.

All of the androgynous influencers I see in social media are fairly lean with neither large chests or hips/butts. I almost wonder if the exact same style and outfits would still look androgynous if they had large breasts?

Sorry if this is a bit rambly. I'm not really sure what I'm asking for here but are there any women or AFAB NBs here who have a similar body type as mine that have found a way to express their masculinity in clothing while still looking good?

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/lilycamilly on 2023-09-24 17:14:36.

I want to get a little perspective on this situation. All fake names, sorry for any vagueness but IDK if either of these people use Reddit.

I have an old friend, let's call her Anya. Everyone involved in this situation is currently in their mid-20's. I've known Anya since we were in middle school, we were good friends all through high school and even were roommates in college for a couple years. She is a wonderful person; very bright and bubbly, extremely smart, confident, caring, and passionate about life. Anya met Rob in a summer class after our Freshman year at college, and they were friends for about a year or so before they started dating. He came over to our place a couple times during their friendship, and I liked him well! He seemed like a smart, cool dude. We were no longer living together when Anya and Rob began officially dating. They dated for a while, I think about a year, but parted ways because his career path (US Military) was going to take him to many places she couldn't follow at that time.

After college, we both moved to different states. Anya is the kind of friend where we don't talk super often because of the distance, but when we do get together, it's like no time has passed at all, especially because we have lots of mutual friends as well. Anya dated a few other guys in the meantime, but none were permanent. In our early 20's, Anya and Rob got back together, and were engaged in under a year. I was very happy for her, I knew she really loved him. They were engaged for just under a year I believe, and I was a bridesmaid in their wedding less than 2 years ago. It was an amazing night!

Here's where stuff gets kinda weird. Only a couple months after their wedding, they both convert to Catholicism (Rob's idea, but Anya was cool with it). To my knowledge, neither of them were particularly religious before this, especially not Anya. A handful of months after that, Roe V. Wade gets overturned, and Rob makes some posts online of the "Babies saved, Liberals owned" celebratory laps type. I am (obviously) thoroughly pro-choice, and so is Anya. I reached out to Anya and asked how she felt about it, and she told me it was a point of contention between them. They were living in a very red state with trigger laws at the time, so I told her she could call me for absolutely anything. She laughed it off and told me she appreciated me looking out with her. This is where I start to side-eye Rob. I privately began worrying about if he will fuck with her BC or trap her into a pregnancy she isn't ready for, but I held my tongue. Over the next several months, Rob makes some more just kinda weirdly religious, holier-than-thou kind of social media posts, but nothing too egregious.

Fast forward to around that next spring, Anya and Rob have been married just over a year and have been stationed in another state (luckily not a red one) and announce they are pregnant! I reach out to Anya to tell her congratulations, and we chat a little about how she's feeling, and she mentions that their baby was an "oopsie" but that they're both very happy. The fact that the baby wasn't planned makes my fears about BC tampering and choice-having reawaken, but I know Anya has always wanted kids. I reach out to Rob and tell him congratulations as well. I sent a gift and letters of support to them each individually (as we are still on the other side of the country from each other).

Their daughter arrived around a month ago, and based on social media posts, everyone's doing well. Now, what prompts today's post is that a couple days ago, Rob posts the headline and photo from this Babylon Bee article. This is the first time (to my knowledge) that Rob has posted something so explicitly anti-LGBT. I will admit, I popped off on him a little. I messaged him privately and told him that was not cool and that I've lost a lot of respect for him. He takes about a day to reply and basically says "We must rebuke all of this behavior for the dignity that God has given to mankind". I rebutted, I popped off even harder, and told him to not preach to me about God, and that if he wants to be high and mighty he shouldn't have joined the Catholic church because of their long history of sexual abuse of both adults and children. I have yet to hear a response.

I then texted Anya, essentially saying that I don't want to stress her out or meddle in her affairs, especially because she's probably crazy tired and stressed because of the new baby, but I wanted to tell her that I popped off on her husband and I don't want to cause trouble, but I'm worried about her. Anya has always been very loving and supportive of the LGBT community, hell, even one of our good mutual friends, who is NB (AFAB) was a brides maid (a "brides they'd", if you will) alongside me in her wedding! I have not heard from either of them back yet, as they are several timezones behind me and it's still very early morning where they are.

My biggest fear is that this recent "enlightenment" of Rob's is going to beat my lovely, career-driven, and independent old friend down into being a submissive trad-wife, and that he'll raise his new baby girl along these strict and traditionally gendered religious lines. I also know it's not up to me how other people raise their children, but at the same time, the Anya I grew up with and know doesn't have an ounce of this bigotry in her heart. I believe she's strong and can stick up for herself, but she's not nearly as politically involved as I am and so I don't know if she knows how many ENORMOUS red flags her husband has been putting up with these right-wing dog whistles. I also am chronically online, and am active on a lot of feminist spaces like this one, so I read a TON of relationship horror stories, and they might have made me overly paranoid.

What do you all make of this situation? I just have so many fears for Anya and her daughter. Rob is still in the military (in the branch that starts with M and rhymes with "tangerines"), and they're obviously not known for their fantastic treatment of women and the LGBT community, or for keeping their own people in check. I worry he'll be the kind of father to force his daughter into toxic purity culture and gender roles. She's only a month old, and I'm worried about her father forcing her to keep an unwanted pregnancy in the coming years...... I am just so worried. But at the same time, I don't want to stick my nose into someone else's relationship. I haven't seen Anya or Rob in person since their wedding. I don't know the ins and outs of their relationship. I don't want to cause problems if there are none, and I don't want to be presumptuous and tell other people how to parent their kids. I don't know. I could just use some outside opinions on all this.

A preemptive thank-you for everyone who wants to share their thoughts <3

A mini update: because he had yet to even open my messages, I unsent my secondary pop-off. I don't want to be a shit-stirrer and I need to be supportive of my friend and her family

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Ashsea on 2023-09-24 17:09:00.

He asked if he could brush and play with my hair. I say absolutely because of course and then he asks for tips on how to braid it saying he wants to learn how.

He says in the middle of it that he really wants to learn just in case we have a daughter in our future.

He said word for word “I would want her to know that her Daddy can do her hair if she wants.” And I absolutely melted. I love him so much.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/mrsckugs on 2023-09-24 17:04:03.

Kotex security has been the brand I've used since I started wearing tampons. The little plastic ledge it has to rest your fingers on, as well as the easy glide applicator made it simple for me. They were discontinued over a year ago, but I had stocked up a small surplus that is sadly dwindling.

I'm not the only one that's in a frenzy about this. I've tried every single one that everyone has suggested as a replacement. The only thing that comes close is Lola, but the applicator doesn't glide well. I tried again last night and my hands looked like a crime scene and I couldn't push it in.

Please don't suggest a cup or some such nonsense. I'm fat with T-Rex arms so cups are a disaster, especially in a small stall setting like at work. I just wanted some comisseration. This shit sucks. I bleed like a goddamned stuck pig so a kotex super plus and an always pad worked for me. Now I have to change my pad every two hours for fear of leakage.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/of_sufi on 2023-09-24 16:59:05.

Hi, so I met this guy on a dating app. I liked him. We vibed. But we are from different faiths and don't see any future together so we have decided to have a casual affair.

He is the first guy I've slept with. When we had sex for the first time it happened organically.

My first experience was great but it bothered me that he didn't go down on me. I went down on him and he loves it so I'm happy to do it. We have had sex twice and made out once, but he hasn't fingered or even touched my “v” at all. I should talk to him about this. But my lack of experience and shyness is getting in the way. What if he says that he finds it gross? Or what if he says he doesn't know how to do it? I can't teach him! I'm worried that I won't know how to handle his response.

Would love some advice on how to ask for what I want and how to handle his negative response, if he responds negatively at all.

Thanks :)

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/afafe_e on 2023-09-24 16:58:21.

No they're not, but the problem with this question is that it ignores an entire side of this phenomenon of struggling men. Yes, men are having their own crisis, and those alpha male podcasters will try their hardest to convince you that it is women and feminism behind this, but aren't women the biggest victims of men's loneliness?

Men feel lonely, so they become more violent to get what is "rightfully" theirs, they kill women who said no to them, they start podcasts and careers centered around how to victimize women, they manipulate women themselves with "feminine energy" bullshit, so that they quit their jobs and settle for horrible men. Whereas when women were suffering (we still are, but I'm specifically talking about the past) , men flourished. They could focus on their jobs, maintain their male friendships even after marriage and kids, they were guaranteed maids, cooks, nannies for their children and sex even if they themselves brought nothing to the table. When women suffer, men succeed, but when men suffer, women die.

So, I'm afraid those podcasters will have to excuse me if I don't show empathy for men as they suffer in a modern society, because I prefer to empathize with the women whose lives are lost, whose bodily autonomy is removed, who are facing the removal of their basic human rights because y'all couldn't accept that the world has moved on, and that you'll have to adapt.

You wanna fix yourselves? Go to therapy, learn how to cook and clean after yourself, shower, organize your time, develop hobbies other than gaming, read books that challenge your point of view. Meet new people with whom you don't necessarily agree and have a conversation with them and resist the urge to be condescending, maybe then you'll learn a thing or two. Befriend women with no expectations of sex or relationships, ask them about their lives and actually listen, it might end up being an important and useful exercise in empathy.

But rest assured, the solution is not to return to the past, because we're not gonna let you.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Yeeyeetyall on 2023-09-24 16:02:59.

To start this off: Me and my dad have a bad relationship. He's emotionally, mentally and physically abusive to me as well as a diagnosed narcissist.

My boyfriend and I are currently doing long distance and I fly over every 3-4 months to see him.

My dad has a history of always making me feel less, and making me seem less in front of others.

3 days ago I came back from seeing my boyfriend and I'd shared with my mom we'd been sexually intimate for the first time, which is a big deal to me because of trauma I will not be sharing.

My dad somehow found out and has taken it upon himself to now shame me any chance he gets.

The jokes go from buying me a pregnancy test out of the blue, asking me if he should be expecting a noise complaint from the hotel we were at, to saying we should record next time to show off at the family Christmas party.....

It's gotten to the point where I don't even feel safe showering because any time I'm ab to he makes some kind of remark towards "it being the only place I could get myself off".

It's only been 3 days after I got a break of the abuse for a month and it's already picking uo again, along with this.... I'm really at my last straw

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Nightangelrose on 2023-09-24 15:29:38.

TLDR: at the end.

I was talking to a former friend (M46?) who is separated from his wife and “dating” a 20 year old model. Arguing, actually. I was talking about acceptable age gaps and trying to inform him about how women are socialized and culturally conditioned differently than men are, and she might feel obligated to have sex with him even if he wasn’t pressuring her (which he would never do.) And that since she’s so young she hasn’t had any time to see the societal discrepancy and yadda yadda. Anyway, he asked me what I think the age of consent should be if not 18. Like, bruh… missed the point entirely. I hate the idea that, as soon as a girl turns a certain age, then she’s free game.

Another time we were talking about something that really upset and enraged me. My best friend’s sister, who I’m not fond of and absolutely don’t respect, works as a high school teacher. An 18 year old male student got mad at a 14 year old female student who was teasing him but wouldn’t have sex with him. She had sent him a sexy Snapchat thinking it would just disappear like snaps do, but dude simply recorded the screen on another device and sent it to their entire class as revenge! The school suspended and gave him detention, nothing else. If I was that girl’s parent, I would bring the wrath of hell down on that school and that guy! I told my friend that it’s posession and distribution of child pornography to minors and he should be arrested and charged as an adult and go through the legal system. Cuz, you know, that’s what it’s for. My former dude friend was totally against this, student is young, barely an adult, don’t ruin his entire future over this one little mistake… the usual defense of despicable violations of women. My argument was that even if a judge was lenient with him because of his age, actually having to go through the legal process might actually make and impact on him as to how horrible his actions were.

Why is the male student barely and adult, isn’t mature, didn’t truly understand how fucked up his actions were and the 20 year old he’s dating (19 when they started) is a fully mature woman capable of making mature decisions, etc?

WHY?!? Why is she a mature adult and the male student is still just a kid?!?

TLDR: my former friend mid 40s guy thinks the 19-20 year old model he’s dating is a fully mature women but an 18 year old guy who sent a 14 year old girl’s sexy Snapchat to his entire class is just a kid and didn’t really understand what he did was wrong and shouldn’t have charges brought.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/BlissfulBlueBell on 2023-09-24 11:55:53.

Even if you weren't married, can you explain what it was like sharing a living space with a man? How did it effect your life? Was it a positive or negative experience?

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Independent-Loss-977 on 2023-09-24 12:16:07.

I have been experiencing this issue for several years, but I have felt hesitant to ask my friends for advice. That's why I thought this would be the right place to discuss it. After I urinate, I tend to experience some wetness in my vaginal area, which then leads to dampness in my panties. This makes me feel uncomfortable throughout the day. Additionally, in Indian washrooms, it is uncommon to find toilet paper. I am curious if other women also face this problem and how they handle this situation.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Difficult_League_852 on 2023-09-24 11:19:56.

I am 23 years old and i never had sex, and don't actually want to have sex.

I was okay with this until friday when my mother told me it wasn't normal. She said she wanted me to start dating and see m'en and "start my life", i am in my last year if study and eyeing appart to move, the last time i told her i was actually looking to move out she got mad. She think i can only move in with a man.

Now i am all work up about it. For starter i don't want to see men because i don't even like men, but i can't really tell her that. Then i have zero interess in sexual things, i am good for now.

She makes me feel abnormal about it, i was good before. Now this is all i think about.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/PothosMetropolis on 2023-09-24 10:32:25.

I won’t be too specific about what I do but I often work large events, as a vendor for a small company. I really do love my job, it’s unique and interesting. The pay is great and I adore my coworkers. That said, the most difficult part of my job (particularly given that many large events have open bars) is how fucking often I am touched. For reasons completely unknown to me, I am constantly having (both men and women but mostly men) men tightly grip my arm to show me something or get my attention. Men touching my shoulders and lower back, tapping my hand or arm to get my attention. This is often the first impression I have of them, often .02 seconds into meeting them for the first time. Today, in an 8 hour shift, I was touched or grabbed by guests over 10 times. I’m tired. It’s not sexual harassment (most of the time anyways) but I don’t feel like they see me as a human. Like I said, I love my job but I’m considering leaving because I get home and lay in bed feeling completely dehumanized. Just looking for anyone else that’s been through it as well and advice is also appreciated. I’ve brought up it up with my boss who is VERY understanding and totally okay with me standing up for myself. That said, I never know what to say and always freeze up in the moment.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/yersiniapestis_ on 2023-09-24 04:11:29.

So I had a man come and grab my hair and pulled it twice within 10 minutes at a club, I'm not sure whether to report this as an assault or just let it go. It really hurt and I had to get my friends to escort me out the club. Neither time did I consent to my hair being touched, let alone pulled. Honestly it really hurt and it made me very upset. I'm not sure if I should/can do anything about it.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Goaty_Junior on 2023-09-24 06:44:41.

Background, this guy is a friend of my husband. We'll call him Andrew. He is married and has a daughter. This "man" just makes really weird sexual comments constantly. Like whenever there is silence, he will fill the void with weird phrases like "caca-peepee-poopy town" and lots of weird phrases all ending in "bitch". And of course, out of place female moans. This man is almost 40 and talking like he is a 13 year old boy.

We have a party coming up in the end of October and as I'm talking about dinner choices with our mutual friends, Andrew speaks up and I'm filled with a sense of dread that this guy is going to be at the party. At first I told my husband I didn't want him to come because his weird remarks make me uncomfortable. My husband told me that would be incredibly rude because Andrew already believed he was invited and to uninvite him would be awkward. As much as I hated to say it, I agreed and told my husband he was right.

The one thing I asked my husband for is that I can come to him if Andrew's comments got to be too much and have him tell Andrew to tone it down. I can take a few weird things, but a whole night of moans and "fuck yeah bitch" is just too uncomfortable to me. My husband denied this request. He said "That's just how he is. What you want me to tell him to stop just because you're uncomfortable?"

YES! I do want you to stand up for your wife while someone is making her uncomfortable! But I guess my husband telling Andrew to stop would be rude, and heaven forbid my husband feel uncomfortable for standing up for his wife...

Why are men like this!? They claim they want to protect their girlfriend/wife/partner, yet when these women come to them and say "help me", their response is to just shrug their shoulders and tell us we're being unreasonable. I'm just so frustrated that I don't even know what to say to my husband. Clearly I'm going to have to take matters into my own hands.

So, anything I can say to Andrew when he's getting bad that also doesn't make me look bad for standing up for myself and they other girls at my party?

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/ladywinterbear on 2023-09-24 05:30:27.

I fully believe that women should be allowed to wear whatever they want to without being shamed. And it includes any clothing they want to wear. But (please forgive me if I'm wrong, I'm still trying to unlearn all the things I've been told about myself), why do women sometimes sexualise themselves?

I'm an asexual. Never felt sexual attraction towards anyone even once in my life. So I've never understood the concept of looking at any person and finding them sexually appealing. And I've always found being sexually attracted to people or portraying yourself in a sexually appealing way (not just physically appealing, if you get what I mean?) is just objectification. I now know that it's not right. And that people can be sexually attracted to others without objectifying them. But in a very abstract way. I accept that other people feel that way, but I myself cannot see how it is possible.

On top of that, I've grown up in a culture where every single part of a women or young girl is sexualised heavily. Even wearing a long top with slits on top of leggings is considered wrong because men can see the shape of our legs. So I've always learned to see myself as a sexual thing first, human second. I'm not exaggerating one bit when I say that. Truly. I still view myself that way but not as rigidly as I used to.

So when I see women dress themselves in a sexually appealing way, I'm only able to think "why are they objectifying themselves so much? Men already do that to us so much, why would you do it to yourself?!?"

That was/is my thought process.

Then I read about exploring ones sexuality. And from what I've read about it, I believe it's a legitimate answer. But I cannot wrap my head around it since such things were just soo unheard of growing up. And I also don't understand what it means to explore ones sexuality.

Can you guys help me make sense of it?

I should go to therapy I know. But I can't afford it right now. And besides, I don't trust the therapists in my home country. Most likely they have beliefs that support the claims or thought processes I'm trying to unlearn.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/OctoberJ on 2023-09-24 04:38:11.

I've been friends with a couple who moved into my neighborhood for a few years, ever since they moved here. I like being inclusive and welcoming new people; introducing them to new people and being helpful when I can. I get along with the wife, I'll call Susie, quite well. Her husband, let's call him Mitch, is also a nice person. He is a trademan, and my husband and I have hired him to do a few jobs. She is his second wife and he is several years older than her, older than me and my husband as well, by a few years. I was taken aback when Susie told me that she questioned her husband whether she needed to worry about me, and flat out told me that's she's worried he has a crush on me, even though he told her not to worry.

While they are very nice, they are both morbidly obese. My husband and I are fit, energetic people. I have no attraction to her husband. I told her that I'm happily married to my husband, and I'm not looking for any other guy. But I see it in her face if I'm outside and he stops to chat.

How do I convince her there's nothing to worry about? If my husband died tomorrow and I was a widow, I would still not have any attraction to her husband. I like them both as friends, and her husband is good at what he does. I've given him a great reference several times and he's gotten some local work because of it. I don't want her to be jealous though, because I know how that can lead to problems. My husband is kind of a jealous husband because I'm very outgoing and he is not. I don't want her to feel that way either.

I empathize with her, but I'm not competion by any means.

Any advice is welcome, but I'm not going to stop working out. (Haha! I know I look good, as bad as that sounds, but I work for it.)

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/AgreeableElevator67 on 2023-09-24 04:07:20.

This happened over three years ago and whenever I think about it, I feel confused and maybe deceived.

I found out I was pregnant from my newly ex boyfriend (we were together when it happened). We were both doctors in the same specialty, though different hospitals, and I was a second year resident (a very busy and scary time, he technically had “power” to ruin my reputation, as he was an attending). The field is relatively small, especially when working in the same city.

Prior to finding out I was pregnant, he was already trying to mess with my job. He would have people call my superiors and start rumors about me. I also had 2 kids. I say this to explain that I was very stressed, so what PP said may have actually been true.

In a moment of weakness, I told him about the pregnancy. He responded horribly and told me he’d do everything in his power to keep the kid from me and he’d win in court because he had money and I had around $250,000 of debt at that point. He would send me texts constantly just yelling at me about anything he could. He called me a liar and said it was someone else’s kid, he told me my other two kids would have a bad life, etc.

I decided it would be best to get an abortion,so I went to planned parenthood and did the normal appointment. I was too far along for the pill (10-11 weeks), so they scheduled the abortion for 72 hours later (required in my state at the time).

The weird part is, when I went back for the procedure, I told them I had some light spotting the day before. I was pretty emotional about this process and I had already been premedicated with narcotics, so maybe even more emotional/disheveled looking. They then pulled me into an ultrasound room and did a scan. The tech said she couldn’t find a heartbeat and had the doctor come in and confirm. The doctor looked around for maybe 15-20 seconds before saying she couldn’t find anything either.

The doctor then advised me to continue with the procedure or go home and let it happen naturally. She basically said, you’re already here and if it doesn’t all come out, you’ll need to do this anyway. I was confused, because I’d already had two successful pregnancies* and it seemed like they told me “no heartbeat”, because I looked sad.

Is that a thing at PP? I don’t work in women’s health, but lying to someone just to make them morally ok with a decision would be unethical in my specialty. But maybe for MY sake, the doctor didn’t look hard enough for a heartbeat? I had mixed feelings about going through with it, but I can’t help but wonder if it’s possible they did that to expedite my decision. I just wish I could know. I’m ok with either truth, but I’ve always had a hard timing grieving without knowing, ya know?

edit: *the reason I mention my previous pregnancies is only to say I experienced the spotting both times and this didn’t seem any different than that.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Sof_a_doc_tah on 2023-09-24 04:27:18.

That box of cake mix in your cabinet? Go bake it. You deserve cake today 🎂🍰

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/carma1616 on 2023-09-24 02:50:17.