this post was submitted on 04 Oct 2024
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First, apologies if this isn't appropriate for a community called "casual conversation". I just don't know of another conversational community to post in. I am more than happy to delete this on request.


Does anyone out there seem to get addicted to their bad moods? Like, you've been feeling down on and off for a week. Instead of seeking out media, conversations, etc. that you know you like and makes you happy, you'd prefer to keep absorbing unhappy media and talking about unhappy things to keep you unhappy. It's almost like you begin to enjoy being unhappy and you don't want it to stop. What the fuck is even that though? Are some people just meant to be insufferable like that? I don't understand why this happens. When I'm happy, I want to continue to be happy. When I'm down, I want to continue to be down even if there is no discernible reason.

Just curious on your thoughts. Thanks for your time.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

I searched for life advice in 30s on youtube and all the videos recommended to me after I watched two videos were about "life changing experience" to "Things to do before turning 30" Videos and still recommended to me.

I think it is because people search for the current issue and suddenly you get tons and tons of relevant videos recommended and they don't go away.

It works the other way to though, if you suddenly start watching fitness videos suddenly all you do is watch fitness videos and believe me from there it ain't far to the protein, carb etc. videos and then it starts mixing up your previous searches "depression" with "fitness" and you landed by the wonderful Tate.

Which is why my video feed is screwed up in an interesting way and my brain doesn't know if it is fine or not. I have Starcraft Videos popping up next to Asmongold, ThatWasEpic, MarkManson and mixed in with random nonames how they got no friends and struggle in life and the next video is someone who tells me to go to the gym at 5 in the morning because thats what machines do.

I think these feeds can make people feel certain ways and if you are feeling bad you are most likely gonna watch something that is about feeling depressed.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Haha...I know about the almighty algorithm, but that's not really the case for what I mean.

Ex: On Spotify, I have both happy songs and sad songs. I click on the sad songs and choose the sad playlists when I'm sad, even though they just propagate sadness. The option to choose the happy songs is right there and I'm not being "pushed" by some computer to pick the sad option. I just do.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago

The playlist sparked a memory for me. A DBT suggestion was to make a playlist for when you are feeling sad. We were told to start with a song or two that matched the darker mood we would be experiencing THEN add songs of increasing positivity. That way the negative feelings are validated before moving on to changing the mood/thoughts. Cause yeah being in the dumps and listening to a happy song only makes me cry harder. 😭. Validate feelings first. Then move toward the goal.