this post was submitted on 03 Nov 2024
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Is not only about the sex but also having a meaningful enough relationship to want to do it with that person
If it's not only about the sex, why was the sex the first (and only) thing you reached for?
So you have someone you get along with really well, and instead of being happy about that you whine (and yes, this is whining) about them not having sex with you.
Your focus is on sex and that's the only thing you can change: your focus.
I never said this was my only and first thought but it is part of the topic of the conversation and it is something that crosses my mind but its not the main thing I think about when I'm getting to get to know someone
You didn't say it. You showed it. Of all the things you could mention about meeting people you got along with and enjoyed spending time with, you complained they wouldn't sex you up.
That tells me where your focus is.
You know what? Women can tell when the guy sitting across from us is thinking about us as chiefly a pile of meat that they want to fuck.
That's also not something you can enforce. Don't meet people with the outlook of them becoming your partner. The best relationships are those where you know that person for a long time and have a bond with already. So find ways to make friends instead and just let things happen when they happen.