this post was submitted on 08 Feb 2025
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15
Would you say people/life is more cruel in America or Germany? (lemmy.world)
submitted 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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21 year old German here.

This question is for Americans who have been to Germany before (or might've had any interaction with Germans). And I know there are a lot of Americans on this platform who bash and hate on their own country but I hope to get an answer that's as truthful and unbiased as possible.

So as someone who's very sensitive I always felt like people here are way too cruel and direct. It's a prevalent stereotype that Germans are very direct and cold. I know that a big part of this is my own perception and mental state that will cause these types of perceptions independent from the country because there will always be assholes.

But I wonder if it could be true that some of my observation might actually be because Germans might actually be more cruel. If you guys are really honest I wonder if it is possible that Americans might be slightly more nice than Germans and which country you think is actually more cruel in general. (Hope this question is not too stupid)

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (2 children)

Yea I don't think that's the case. And even if I would still take fake friendliness over cold honesty every day. I think the stereotype of "fake friendliness" is more associated with areas like California/LA. I know some people from the South and they're genuinely nice (and I can tell it's real. I see it very quickly if someone is faking it). But as I stated in my post there are always assholes everywhere

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I’ve lived in both the south, and in CA. There are wonderful people both places, and a lot of fake people. The amount of casual racism, bigotry, and hate has been much higher in the south. And it’s made it really hard to stomach their ‘hospitality’.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

These racist people have no reason to wander around. Imagine having the wrong skin brightness and encountering one of these racist people in the middle of nowhere and they have a gun!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Fake friendliness exists everywhere in the US. It's just our social lubricant. The problem is that Southern fake friendliness is sort of oppressive, they can be kind of pushy. As in you're the rude one if you're not interested in their hospitality or friendliness. As a New Jerseyan, I'd much rather be able to say a polite "no thanks" and have that be respected, which is what you get in the Northeast and in SoCal.

I prefer to be more direct. Not necessarily cold, just forthright. In the South there are all these layers of manners and expectations that can be hard for a Northerner to navigate. I think they often genuinely mean to be nice, but they don't realize how pushy they are.

BTW I don't have any real experience with Midwesterners but from what I understand, they can be similar to Southerners in this regard.

I prefer the Northeastern way to the Southern way, and I think I'd way prefer the German way to the Southern way.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

I think I’d way prefer the German way to the Southern way.

Yea I'm definitely the exact opposite in that regard