The Onion

5224 readers

1866 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

502

Master negotiator Donald Trump to end Ukraine war by simply giving Russia everything it wants (newsthump.com)

submitted 4 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

23 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Trump, who won reelection in November 2024 partly by claiming he could end the Ukraine war in one day, spent his first month in office posting cryptic messages on Truth Social about how the “deep state” was preventing him from implementing his genius plan. Now, with pressure mounting, he has finally delivered on his promise – by offering to surrender on Ukraine’s behalf.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] TheGoddessAnoia 5 points 4 days ago (3 children)

I wonder if he thinks he can also ignore basic contract law on the international scale? Or is he maybe planning to send US troops to assist the Russians when the Ukrainians refuse to recognise his genius.

[–] HungryJerboa 3 points 3 days ago

This is how the orange man will stave off WW3, by uniting American and Russian troops against a common enemy!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I'm sure he's prepared to promise anything to make his deal come through, but abandon those promises immediately afterwards.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

That's how promises work, in his mind

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 days ago

"When religion and politics travel in the same cart the riders believe themselves to be unstoppable"