this post was submitted on 14 Apr 2025
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[–] [email protected] 70 points 3 weeks ago (5 children)

I'm convinced my wife is at least partially a reptile. The inability to maintain body heat is amazing.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Im pretty sure my wife's feet secrete ice. They are somehow still freezing cold despite being in the thickest socks I could find.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

My wife refers to the electric blanket as the single best thing that has ever happened to her. She says she doesn't need me anymore.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

R.I.P this mans marriage.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Fun fact estrogen makes people feel colder. Many trans women, including myself, have a much harder time staying warm after starting hrt. I don't remember the exacts but it changes blood flow and makes it easier to lose heat

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I thought I read somewhere that it directed more to the core instead of the extremities

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

My core is a god damned furnace.

My feet? My hands???

Icicles.

It's painful! I shove my hands into my armpits to warm them but my feet can't contort like that.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Hold up, could I be getting cold hands and feet because my hormones are messed up? Now that is messed up.
I just sit cross legged so I can shove my feet in my legpits aka knee behind

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

Maybe? I'm on the depo shot, and it is a hormone shot I'm pretty sure, and I've never had colder feet. So other hormone changes could absolutely do things to feet and hands I'd think!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago

I am trying to imagine a woman sitting cross legged, but somehow have her foot behind her knee where it bends. And I cannot imagine that without the visual looking like some glitchy AI image. Like the leg would have to bend in half between the knee and the ankle for that to happen.

LADY!!! HOW ARE YOU DOING THIS??? This is like some circus side show shit. There's the man with a beard of bees, and the woman who can bend her leg in inhuman ways. Are you SURE you have bones? Wait, are you a cat? Have cats finally gained sentience within the human world, and begun understanding human languages and also technology? I knew this day would come. I hope everyone realizes that the 48th president is going to be a cat. And they will enact laws such as "Mandatory knocking things off tables" laws. They'll also make it mandatory for you to open the door for them, so that they can sit there and mentally laugh at how ridiculous you look opening the door for them at their beck and call. Your cat owns you. Your cat laughs at how pathetic you look scooping their poop. That's why they poop IMMEDIATELY after you spend 30 minutes cleaning their litter box. IMMEDIATE poop. I mean like you haven't even gotten up off the floor yet, and they're already in there pooping. Just to show you that they don't appreciate your work at all. They poop on your hard work. Literally. And then every morning you'll wake up to them inserting their butthole right into your face. They haven't figured out how to just sit on your face, but they're trying real hard. You're their servant, and they love it. Now they're going into politics.

And honestly? I'm kind of looking forward to it. That's how bad trumps presidency is. I am now willingly open to the idea of a cat as president instead of him. Knowing full well how much of a little asshole cats are, it can't possibly be worse than trump.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago

You just reminded me of the movie Superstar, or the SNL sketches it was based on.

"Sometimes I get nervous, so I stick my hands into my armpits to warm them up.....AND THEN I SNIFF THEM LIKE THIS!!!"

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm sure it's easier to put your foot in your mouth to warm it up.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

You'd think doing that would warm feet up but I do it constantly and it doesn't!!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Does that mean your mouth is just as cold?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Cold from all the feet.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago

You could put your feet in your kneepits, but I'm not sure how warm they are.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Mine is always cold, but turns into a fucking nuclear reactor when she falls asleep.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago

A mobile thermonuclear reactor that needs to cuddle. I need a cool bottle of water nearby at all times to prevent overheating.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

let's try bleeding monthly for a week for a couple of decades and see if we can still keep our feet warm

we should also spend half of that month with a lower body temperature

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago

Mine's a heat battery. Normally colder than anyone around, but let's go cuddle and sleep and 1h later I'm overheating after she reached critical heat and started radiating it back.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Bunch of show-offs in here bragging about having wives...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

Roll on snare. Everybody laughs.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

I'm both the wife and the wife haver

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago

I don't know if it's a brag when the relationship is that transactional.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago

̶:̶ ̶.̶ ̶|̶ ̶:̶ ̶;̶

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

There's an infamous comic titled "Loss" and it's become a meme to try to remind people of it by making other comics with a similar arrangement of characters. The comic in this post has kind of a reversed arrangement, so one might see it as the opposite of Loss, therefore "Found".

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago

Ah I figured it had something to do with Loss but I couldn't see the resemblance at all

[–] DarkSirrush 4 points 3 weeks ago

They are joking about it because it looks similar to the webcomic Ctrl+Alt+Del

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

So not just me

Good to know I’m not the only sufferer of wife having cold feet

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

I think my partner and I have had almost this exact conversation even.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Holy shit Something Positive. I used to read this religiously. Glad to see it's still around.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

Right? I've been reading that since like, high school.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago

Oh man, it's been forever since I read this webcomic.

And yeah, that's pretty much how my 20 years of marriage has been.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I actually don't get it, can someone please explain ?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

The guy got a milkshake for his wife and she was grateful, then they both got sarcastic because that's how they do.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

Is that what a chocolate malt is? I was wondering about that. Do they actually add malt to it?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago

Yes and yes. It's pretty good imo, my favorite milkshake flavor. They were super popular in the 1920s.