Hemorrhoids have entered the chat
this post was submitted on 27 Apr 2025
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Eat more fiber. And stop pushing so hard when you poop.
Apparently stop sitting there for twenty minutes after too. Gotta poop and scoot
If only it is that easy.
I have a trick to help along hesitant logs. First, you get some toilet paper over your fingers, then you press in at the soft spot right past the end of the tailbone. The sweet spot seems to be about half way between the tailbone and the bhole. Do it right and the log just glides right out with practically no effort and no pain.
The ole poop and scoot. I had a cocker spaniel who was a master at this maneuver.
Do the poop scoot boogie
And never leave.
Just be constipated at work. Get paid to browse memes.
I've never understood reading on the toilet, or nowadays playing on a phone. I sit down, shit, wipe, I'm gone. The whole process takes me like 2 minutes and I don't go in there til I'm ready. Seems like there are much more comfortable places to read. Am I some kind of mutant with a lucky metabolism? I just don't get that whole concept.
A lot of folk treat toilet as their sanctum. You are alone in there. Nobody is gonna bother you, it's just you and your thoughts. You can take a breather, let out a good, long shit and allow yourself to become calmer. When ready, go out to face the world again.
Just eat more fiber. I'm literally never constipated.
Or drink some water.
Tmi.
When I got old, my prostate woke up and even a normal movement is pain. When I get constipated I am screaming to the gods. Sadly I don't get to meme :(
How do you mean ‘woke up’?
The proctologist delved too greedily and too deep
It has started spasming and the doctors so far don't know why.
Magnesium supplements help.
Happens to the best of us
This hits so hard at this exact moment