Programmer Humor

I want a programming language that supports German composite words.

My brother in Turing, that's just camel case.

Kein Problem: https://ddp.im/

POV: ESL programmers

Spring JPA Query methods are kind of like the composite words. You just declare a method with a name that describes the database query you want, and it generates the code and SQL for you.

https://docs.spring.io/spring-data/jpa/reference/jpa/query-methods.html

Make enough C macro definitions and you can certainly do that, I did my final project in my high school programming class in the 90's like that, made macros to simulate QBasic syntax and then just wrote it in basic, the end result is the macros converted everything into valid C++ and it compiled fine. Fortunately my teacher for that class was cool, and he was amused by it and since it compiled with no warnings and did what it was supposed to do, I got full marks for it.

In college, we had to use Hungarian pseudocode. I still have PTSD from it, especially as the teacher was a psycho that had a meltdown every time her "how do you do fellow kids" moment terribly backfired, most infamously by putting Twilight references into a test (everybody audibly cringed reading the tests).

French fucking Excel formulas is an abomination and needs to die.

integer

Was soll der Quatsch denn heißen? Wer ist hier integer? Bei uns heißt das Ganzzahl, verdammt!!1!

*wütende Programmierergeräusche*

I want a programming language that supports German style composite words

Java

https://github.com/michidk/rost

Aren't you müde from writing Rust programs in English? Do you like saying "scheiße" a lot? Would you like to try something different, in an exotic and funny-sounding language? Would you want to bring some German touch to your programs?

rost (German for Rust) is here to save your day, as it allows you to write Rust programs in German, using German keywords, German function names, German idioms.

Finally, a language where CamelCase feels natural

Whoa, I was expecting just a light joke & was not prepared for this, lolwut.

I use VBA frequently, don't actually speak German, so I'll ofc try this. And none of my code was ever readable (weirdly lewd, but not fully making sense), so that's fine.

At least the names are extremely self-documenting. Some of those German variable names are long enough they might even be self-aware!

Yeah, Excel does that, it always fascinated me. It was so weird writing =KDYŽ instead of =IF in Excel. Different times, I guess.

Wofür steht 'wd'??? Wochendag oder wie??? GEFEUERT werden muss die Person!

Seriously, fuck Excel for this. I always hate to look up function names in German.

A key reason English became the preeminent language of scientific and technical communication, and thus the source of keywords in programming languages, is because German (the other candidate) fell out of favour due to the two world wars. So, were it not for Prussian militarism, our programming languages may have instead been based on German (along with most scientific literature being in German).

I know there is a programming language called windev, all in French, just in case you want to suffer. I would except a good exception handling mechanism in a French base language.

An example from their website: ` TotalCA est un monétaire = CalculCAMoisEnCours()

SI TotalCA >= 1 250 000 ALORS LIB_Objectif= "Objectif dépassé !" LIB_Objectif.Couleur= VertFoncé

SINON SI TotalCA <= 200 000 ALORS LIB_Objectif= "Objectif non atteint" LIB_Objectif.Couleur= RougeClair FIN

FIN `

Functional programming languages kind of are that way. Just chain together enough map calls

I am german and I feel physical pain reading this code

silently goes to German GitHub to learn German words

My experience with German programming languages is with Siemens PLC's, since the programming language changes together with the IDE when you set the language to German. Looking at Structured Text / Instruction List having U (und) instead of A (and) operator and bunch of other things was interesting.

But IIRC there were also higher programming languages that are in other languages? Wasn't there one for arabic? Was this it: https://github.com/nasser/---/