The lighter side of ADHD
Like telling someone who’s missing both legs to get better shoes so they can keep up.
On the flip side, someone with legs isn’t gonna understand the point of prosthetics because it would be totally useless to them.
ADHD has definitely opened my eyes to how much we humans subconsciously assume we know everything based on our own experiences.
Also one of those things is visible and generally comprehensible to others.
Someone getting annoyed because your advice didn't work for them due to their specific mental patterns....is very different from missing a leg.
Like telling someone who’s missing both legs to get better shoes so they can keep up.
But it's not. You're confusing material conditions with psychological conditions. The brain is far more plastic than the leg (stump). And neuroatypicals regularly develop coping mechanisms that would be the envy of any paraplegic.
ADHD has definitely opened my eyes to how much we humans subconsciously assume we know everything based on our own experiences.
I think people will often divert to "This won't work on me because I have ADHD" and often miss that lots of advice is just bad or otherwise useless to the public at-large. The "Bootstraps" mentality of self-help gurus constantly assume you have more free time, more financial slack, and more raw dumb luck than the average prole.
I can't count how many times I've seen "just go door to door handing out resumes" pitched as a solution to a few million people rendered unemployed during a recession. I routinely see InsanePeopleFacebook tier "smart savings" advice that amounts to either comically unrealistic spending/savings rates or recklessly foolish investment tips. Then there's the Common Wisdom that only survives the first two years out of high school. "Just go get an X", be it a vocational career or a law degree or a ticket to the next boom town or a rich spouse, works right up until too many people take the same advice.
"Haha, you can't trick me into joining your MLM because I'm neurdivergent" signals that you've made the right choice but often for the wrong reasons. As a result, it just opens you up to a different kind of affinity scam ("We invented an MLM for ADHD!").
Rather than self-segregating and embracing alienation, we need to recognize the fundamental economic game as rigged and tackle it with a unified front.
someone with legs isn’t gonna understand the point of prosthetics
...?
Probably could have worded that better but there’s no perfect analogy :/
I was trying to say that when you look at someone missing legs most people immediately understand certain areas of life are more challenging for them than for yourself. You might even treat them with more respect because of this and support them when you’re able.
However, looking at someone with ADHD, you can’t see their prefrontal cortex or neurotransmitters at all. Thus it usually doesn’t make sense why life could be more challenging for them than it is for yourself.
The reality is most of us default to projecting our own life experience on others as hard facts (sometimes leading to false assumptions other people’s intentions). We could all really benefit from looking at people around us with an openness and curiosity, knowing that there’s a lot we don’t know and can’t see
It's fair I can't understand why they don't just use the legs they don't have
"doesn't hurt to ask"
me panicking because I have to ask
Now I'm having a secondhand panic attack for you asking
"just sit still" said to me by pretty much every teacher my entire life.
I'm not sure what teachers should do with chronic leg jigglers and fidgety people, but telling them to just sit still was not a winner lol.
Do you really think being fidgety as a child is sufficient to consider yourself neuro-atypical?
Sounds like your teacher was just a piece of shit.
Yeah there's fidgety and then there's leg jiggling so aggressively that the entire row of desks is moving and I'm not even noticing because I am so focused on what I am writing down.
Also in adulthood I was finally properly diagnosed with "moderate to severe ADHD". Probably should have done that in highschool when I told my parents but what are you gonna do. Can't change the past.
"Get up, go run to that tree, and come back" was sometimes at least somewhat effective, particularly with younger children. Also, getting up and moving for a minute helps with learning anyway.
Nah I just got sent to the principals office for being "purposely distracting" to other students.
Some teachers shouldn't have their jobs.
I would like to recommend the following order of presenting the argument:
I didn't follow your advice because it relays on me not having ADHD and therefore is useless.
I am so tired of being judged
Every manager I’ve ever had
"All you have to do is just pay attention!"
I mean...what do you expect from this situation?
I'm inferring a scenario where you are being taught how to do something. And you are not paying attention. it also sounds like you're not communicating any of your needs.
So: what do you expect from this situation other than someone to be annoyed that you're wasting their time? What is the good outcome and how do you and this other human with a different brain to you get to that outcome?