this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2023
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In addition to all the comments about de-federation, there are a few other things too.
One, its the nature of federated services that it is asynchronous. Similarly if you send a large email, and most of your contacts are on @gmail it will show their practically immediately, and the guy on some other IMAP server will take slightly longer to get it and its replies, and if you have a one off on an old POP3 server, he could end up days out of sync.
Servers on the fediverse as a whole, and lemmy particularly, are on overdrive right now due to the increase in new users based on #RedditMigration that we weren't entirely prepared for. It will work out in the end, be patient!
Bonus: This type of "issue" makes flame wars far less likely.